The Litmus Test... Latin Women Love Gringos

[bcc_1_2]

I had an offline conversation and took issue with some advice I heard. Now you will read this on a lot of websites out there too so I thought I'd bring it up. What is boils down to is that I think socioeconomics play a larger role than what some people might want to admit.
Many that have traveled to Latin America will tell you that Latinas are just attracted to white Americans for whatever reason. They are cool with them being older... and even average looking guys seem like Hollywood movie stars to them. Also we are just known for treating women better than local men. I'm not saying none of that that is true, but I do think there is a great way to put it to the test. I also challenge anyone to give this a try. This challenge is extra fun because the stereotype on the internet is that Mexicans and Central Americans aren't as attractive as Colombians.
So here goes... fly into Mexico City and book a hotel room in the Condesa and Roma area of Mexico City. You will find journalists, celebrities, and plenty of smoking hot women in their teens, 20s, and 30s.
In all seriousness I think guys will have a lot better understanding of the role socioeconomics play. I bring this up not for any one person, but I do have an acquaintance that wants to party in Latin America like me (AKA meet a woman I'm sure).
I used the Condesa/Roma argument to try and debunk some bad advice that was passed onto this person.

[utopiacowboy]

You don't even need to go to all that trouble. Just stop by North Star Mall or La Cantera Mall in San Antonio any weekend and you'll see more elegant beautiful Mexicanas from Monterrey than you can count. They have absolutely NO interest in any gringo except maybe George Clooney or Christian Bale.

[mudd]

maybe 10 years ago, it wouldnt be such an issue but now, gringos are a dime a dozen and any cute girl can easily find some foreigner with $$$ on just about any internet dating site.  i know some paisas who " rotate" gringos every month, one flys in for a few weeks, leaves, three weeks later, the next gringo fly's in and neither knows about the other. amazing what gringos will believe from a cute young pretty face, 


i used to hear years past " im looking for a man who doesnt cheat, doesnt drink like a fish and is a good provider for a family"   now, its " a good job/ economic possibilities and good looking"

[SkyNorth]

So if I am reading the above posts correctly.  Then South of the Border isn't that much different than North of the Border as to what might motivate a female to choose a guy.
 

Now I'm confussed.

[bcc_1_2]

You don't even need to go to all that trouble. Just stop by North Star Mall or La Cantera Mall in San Antonio any weekend and you'll see more elegant beautiful Mexicanas from Monterrey than you can count. They have absolutely NO interest in any gringo except maybe George Clooney or Christian Bale.

I've heard that before too. Say a guy who looks like Louis CK... his experience in BAQ Colombia is going to be way different than say Condesa.
I suppose the moral of the story is that there is no big secret out there. I met some women that would have been perfect for me... if we were living in Cali. I did not have the guts at all to the pull trigger and bring back to the USA. And for younger men like me and middle aged men working to save for retirement and such... moving to a place like Cali is not an option. You generally can't make a good living there (well 99% of us can't bring our work with us) and once the hot chick goggles wear off you find out you are living in a dangerous [snip]hole.
I'm not saying don't go to Latin America. I'm freakin glad I did... but it really comes down to finding a woman with some serious character because moving to the USA comes with big changes and temptations.

[InnocentVixen]

So if I am reading the above posts correctly.  Then South of the Border isn't that much different than North of the Border as to what might motivate a female to choose a guy.
 
Now I'm confussed.

I don't think is confusing at all, basically the situation in Mexico might not be the best but it could be far worse and for the most part we are raised to not throw ourselves to men regardless of our social status, being a handsome gringo might act against you since more often than not the woman will not believe you are serious about her or feel intimidated by you... personally I've always thought that is a good thing since once you win her over and prove yourself she will not have eyes for anyone but you, but a lot of guys on the board see this as bad news since "it's too much work".


Also believe it or not, there is plenty of americans that come here to have a better quality of life with the little they have or for an inexpensive vacation, so it's old news for us gringo does not necessarily = money... there for less attention from golddiggers... which again I would think it is a good thing, but with all the respect there is plenty of attention seekers out there.


That lovely hot girl in her teens/20's/30's will probably end up with a guy who is not wealthy, not faithful and probably even not that good looking no matter what she says she is looking for, why? because he put some effort in pursuing her, sad isn't?


I must admit europeans are still a novelty so they do have an advantage over here.

[Jeff S]

I suppose the moral of the story is that there is no big secret out there. I met some women that would have been perfect for me... if we were living in Cali. I did not have the guts at all to the pull trigger and bring back to the USA. And for younger men like me and middle aged men working to save for retirement and such... moving to a place like Cali is not an option. You generally can't make a good living there (well 99% of us can't bring our work with us) and once the hot chick goggles wear off you find out you are living in a dangerous [snip]hole.

I'm not saying don't go to Latin America. I'm freakin glad I did... but it really comes down to finding a woman with some serious character because moving to the USA comes with big changes and temptations.

Geez bcc, Great post. What happened? I guess getting married knocked some sense into you... 

[Micky]

In my advance stages of "oldtimers"  I have come to this conclusion, -  One could follow all of the "standard" advice,  the red flags,  green flags,  differences of age,  education,  social and economic backgrounds,  etc.. Love,  romance and the entire relationship deal is the MOST unscientific sector of our lives.  You could follow all the "rules",  make all of the right moves and end up in a pile.  You could break all of the "rules" and end up in a sweet place.  To each his own.  All I say is get off the bench and into the "game".  The "only" way to really lose,  stay on the bench.
 

Micky

[bcc_1_2]

Europeans might be a novelty in Ensenada, but I don't think that would be true for Mexico City and other parts of Mexico.
I'm not sure I've had the sense knocked into me... I'm just annoyed by recent events I suppose. You'd think guys would leave a clearly pregnant woman alone  haha. I'm just saying in the Midwest a hot latina really sticks out... creepy guys will stare... guys will always try and strike up a conversation with her just about anywhere... baby bump... ring on her finger... doesn't seem to even matter.
There is a Russian girl in my area... now divorced and dancing in the local strip club... smoking hot and making serious bank... I'm just saying there is some serious temptations here.

[Calipro]

I had an offline conversation and took issue with some advice I heard. Now you will read this on a lot of websites out there too so I thought I'd bring it up. What is boils down to is that I think socioeconomics play a larger role than what some people might want to admit.
Many that have traveled to Latin America will tell you that Latinas are just attracted to white Americans for whatever reason. They are cool with them being older... and even average looking guys seem like Hollywood movie stars to them. Also we are just known for treating women better than local men. I'm not saying none of that that is true, but I do think there is a great way to put it to the test. I also challenge anyone to give this a try. This challenge is extra fun because the stereotype on the internet is that Mexicans and Central Americans aren't as attractive as Colombians.
So here goes... fly into Mexico City and book a hotel room in the Condesa and Roma area of Mexico City. You will find journalists, celebrities, and plenty of smoking hot women in their teens, 20s, and 30s.
In all seriousness I think guys will have a lot better understanding of the role socioeconomics play. I bring this up not for any one person, but I do have an acquaintance that wants to party in Latin America like me (AKA meet a woman I'm sure).
I used the Condesa/Roma argument to try and debunk some bad advice that was passed onto this person.

All you have to do is go to Latin American Cupid or any many other latin dating sites to see that Mexicanas interest in meeting Americans for relationships is practically nil compared to Colombianas. The population of Mexico is about three times that of Colombia and there are 10 times more Colombianas looking to hook up with Americans online than Mexicanas......I don't know what the percentage of Mexicanas living in poverty are compared to Colombia but I bet there are a lot more of them than in Colombia just based on the huge population differences......I think from a cultural standpoint Mexicanas are just not as into Americans as Colombianas.

[V_Man]

I don't think is confusing at all, basically the situation in Mexico might not be the best but it could be far worse and for the most part we are raised to not throw ourselves to men regardless of our social status, being a handsome gringo might act against you since more often than not the woman will not believe you are serious about her or feel intimidated by you... personally I've always thought that is a good thing since once you win her over and prove yourself she will not have eyes for anyone but you, but a lot of guys on the board see this as bad news since "it's too much work".

I am still a little shocked from time to time how much my girl worries that some other girl will steal me from her.

Getting back on topic, I told my girl that I will move to South America if she has any trouble getting a visa to come here. She wants me to start making arrangements now! Her primary concern is that we can be together and stay together. That doesn't mean that she would not like a good life in a rich country with many opportunities. She certainly would perfer that. It just isn't the highest priority. My personal philosophy is that you shouldn't ask a woman to marry you and move to your country if you would not be willing to do the same for her. I don't expect other people to follow that principal but I find it a helpful attitude.

[Micky]

VM -
 
You have a very good attitude Bro,  keep it!
 
Micky

[dtibbet]

In my advance stages of "oldtimers"  I have come to this conclusion, -  One could follow all of the "standard" advice,  the red flags,  green flags,  differences of age,  education,  social and economic backgrounds,  etc.. Love,  romance and the entire relationship deal is the MOST unscientific sector of our lives.  You could follow all the "rules",  make all of the right moves and end up in a pile.  You could break all of the "rules" and end up in a sweet place.  To each his own.  All I say is get off the bench and into the "game".  The "only" way to really lose,  stay on the bench.
 

BINGO Micky exactoooo:)))))

[fathertime]

So if I am reading the above posts correctly.  Then South of the Border isn't that much different than North of the Border as to what might motivate a female to choose a guy.
 

Now I'm confussed.

skynorth...don't be confused...bcc is just full of himself as usual because he is young and married someone his age, and he likes to be backdoor derogatory about women who go for a man quite a bit older....


of course the ladies like the financial security that many of us bring to the table.  It is a GIVEN, & 90% of the men know this and those that don't probably have mental deficiencies that will screw up what ever relationship they are in.    financial security is not nearly enough to make these relationships work, a man has to bring much more to the table than some cash, but it certainly isn't a bad start. 


A half way decent looking man with a good attitude and has enough money to have at least a middle class life here in the states can do just fine in Colombia.






Fathertime!   

[QRCAP2012]

Yeah, I kinda like what Vman has to say, too. What's good for the goose should be good for the gander, yes? It's true a lot of men just can't turn loose of their job and their established life to go live in a [snip] hole as bcc calls it, but they should at least consider the possibilities. there are dozens of ways to make a living independently so being tied to a job in a first world country isn't the anchor it used to be.

[bcc_1_2]

skynorth...don't be confused...bcc is just full of himself as usual because he is young and married someone his age, and he likes to be backdoor derogatory about women who go for a man quite a bit older....

If I would have brought back one of the women I was dating in Cali it probably would have turned into a trainwreck.

[fathertime]

If I would have brought back one of the women I was dating in Cali it probably would have turned into a trainwreck.

That may be but it would have been your fault for either:


1.  Choosing an unsuitable lady.
2.  Not doing what you needed to do within a marriage. 


  Assuming your current marriage is going well, it stands to reason that if you had chosen a suitable Colombian lady it would also go well.   There are many beautiful 'normal' and nice ladies on the international dating scene in Colombia, it appears you feel you didn't meet these types.


Fathertime! 

[bcc_1_2]

That may be but it would have been your fault for either:


1.  Choosing an unsuitable lady.
2.  Not doing what you needed to do within a marriage. 

I vehemently disagree. It is really about time we stop blaming men for everything. If we are talking about a 50/50 partnership here you can't lay it all on the man.

[fathertime]

I vehemently disagree. It is really about time we stop blaming men for everything. If we are talking about a 50/50 partnership here you can't lay it all on the man.

  I’ll tell you this much, when something bad happens to me, one of the first things I start thinking about is what the hell I did to make this happen.  Almost always it is something I did to cause the negative thing.  Of course there are exceptions, like if a freeway overpass suddenly collapses and I get caught at the wrong place at the wrong time, but those are the rare exceptions.  I don’t think it is productive to start blaming the ladies when relationships go bad.   If the woman had a secondary plan, then that was the man’s fault for not figuring that out during the courting process.  If the woman gradually becomes disenchanted with the husband, then it is the man’s job to see the small signs as it is happening, and take steps to fix the relationship.  I think it is the rare woman that would suddenly have a change in heart and run off with some other Don Juan.  There are almost always little signs that things are starting to go off track.  I acknowledge that SOMETIMES things are truly unavoidable, but that is the exception. and in those cases the man can’t do too much about it anyway, so why even worry about it.

This isn’t about ‘blaming the man’, this is about men realizing they as individuals have the control over their relationships.  Your message seems to be a hopeless one, in which it is pretty much a crapshoot, and if you have a happy successful marriage then it is just luck.  I agree though with you partially, some men are going to be easy quitters/blamers and in their case they should just forget about having a young beautiful lady from Colombia, because they will be toast.   I really don't think there is much room in a  solid marriage to have a 'blaming attitude'             

Fathertime! 

[InnocentVixen]

Europeans might be a novelty in Ensenada, but I don't think that would be true for Mexico City and other parts of Mexico.

I have not been to every part of Mexico, I can't even claim to know half of it (never been anywhere south for example or by the gulf) but I can tell you that I have been to Mexico City and Guadalajara before, along with plenty of places along the pacific coast and mexicanas I've met (locals and non-local) find them quite intriguing as a general rule, but who knows? maybe it has been my luck that I end in places where that is the case and happen to meet women that think that way.


I would go into detail about it but I don't see the point in it, just mentioning in hopes the idea doesn't set as a golden rule in foreigners minds. For all is worth the fascination with europeans vs. americans I think it is not much different from the negative views of mexicans in the states, sure we have some bad people, but there is also other latinos doing bad stuff who are often confused with mexicans, so in a way I think americans get blamed on what caucasian men from overseas might do leaving europeans get away with a somewhat decent reputation.

[mambocowboy]

I don't think socioeconomics are all that. "la quimica" seems to be more important. My Barranquillera wife is my wife because I'm stable and attractive enough. There were plenty of other men pursuing who were more financially well off than me, but we have "la quimica."
 

[mambocowboy]

Plus, my wife left behind a career in order to come live with me in the hopes of having a family together.

[Alabamaboy!]

All you have to do is go to Latin American Cupid or any many other latin dating sites to see that Mexicanas interest in meeting Americans for relationships is practically nil compared to Colombianas. The population of Mexico is about three times that of Colombia and there are 10 times more Colombianas looking to hook up with Americans online than Mexicanas......I don't know what the percentage of Mexicanas living in poverty are compared to Colombia but I bet there are a lot more of them than in Colombia just based on the huge population differences......I think from a cultural standpoint Mexicanas are just not as into Americans as Colombianas.

Almost all my clients and workers are Mexicans and they prefer to marry and have relationships with other Mexicans for the most part. Very few of them are interested in gringos. Even if the gringo is a young, handsome guy, with a good job. On the other hand, Colombianas would fall all over these guys. There seems to be a big difference. I  tell my Mexican friends that Colombians seem to be way more compatible with the gringo lifestyle, and they agree. Most Mexicans I have met are very old school and their family is not going to be so thrilled if they marry a non-Mexican.

All that being said, IV seems to be a great girl who would definitely be a great match for a guy living in the States. So there are always exceptions to the rule.

[Alabamaboy!]

skynorth...don't be confused...bcc is just full of himself as usual because he is young and married someone his age, and he likes to be backdoor derogatory about women who go for a man quite a bit older....


of course the ladies like the financial security that many of us bring to the table.  It is a GIVEN, & 90% of the men know this and those that don't probably have mental deficiencies that will screw up what ever relationship they are in.    financial security is not nearly enough to make these relationships work, a man has to bring much more to the table than some cash, but it certainly isn't a bad start. 


A half way decent looking man with a good attitude and has enough money to have at least a middle class life here in the states can do just fine in Colombia.






Fathertime!

I agree with FT, money is not the only thing, but it sure does help. And when I am talking about money, I am not talking about rock star status. I am referring to having enough to have a stable, middle class lifestyle as FT mentioned. No Colombiana is going to be very happy to leave her family, friends, and entire life there to come here and suffer in poverty in a place far away from all that she knows.

[Alabamaboy!]

I don't think socioeconomics are all that. "la quimica" seems to be more important. My Barranquillera wife is my wife because I'm stable and attractive enough. There were plenty of other men pursuing who were more financially well off than me, but we have "la quimica."

You are right, the chemistry is very important. I remember one BAQ girl who I was not ever involved with, but with whom I talked to from time to time on MSN. She was completely in love with a young gringo, blond hair, green eyed. He lived in Iowa or something and was in Colombia with some kind of church propaganda group. Anyway they met, fell in love, and began the Visa process. But at the end, it was a disaster because the guy did not even have enough cash to do the Visa process, let alone support a wife. So she ended up completely turned off from any guy without enough financial means to "get the job done". She ended up hating the guy because he misled her and wasted 2 years of her life.

I told her she should be happy that he was not able to scrape together the cash to get her to the states because her lifestyle here would not be very great. A poor person in BAQ, surrounded by family and friends can be much happier than a poor person in a non-Spanish speaking, small town in the middle of corn country.