Still can't pull the trigger

[Woody]

Last Edit: Yesterday at 10:23:16 PM by Jeff S

And it does "sound" like Jeff. Maybe it was just some moderation error.

It confused me at first, it looks like Jeff was trying to edit his own post or make a new reply and accidentally edited Steve's. (The controls are all the same to Jeff, because he is logged in as a moderator.)

[Jeff S]

Yes - sorry - hit the wrong button. It was my reply to Stevieboy's question. I inadvertently modified your original post. My bad.

[Jeff S]

Its hard for me to understand the urgency of this all. I mean you all talk about the path as if it is work. Man the path is where its at. Have fun and live, If you meet her great, if not why stress. Its so gringoesque. Gotta get results right now... Gotta be married... etc, etc. The goal thing gets in the way of living in the moment.

Exactly!

[Researcher]

Its hard for me to understand the urgency of this all. I mean you all talk about the path as if it is work. Man the path is where its at. Have fun and live, If you meet her great, if not why stress. Its so gringoesque. Gotta get results right now... Gotta be married... etc, etc. The goal thing gets in the way of living in the moment.

     That is why I say make it part of your lifestyle. Some people don't think that way though. Some people set goals and make plans and marriage and children are planned along with their careers. They say "I'll finish college this year, find a job at this point, get married when I am this age and have children at this age." After having a few serious relationships when I was younger I decided not to do that. Life doesn't seem to work that way. But sometimes good things don't just fall in your lap either. It's best to live in the moment but be open to possibilities as well.


    Researcher

[benjio]

Stevie,
 
I can definitely relate to your apprehension because at times I can be a VERY analytical person as well. I researched Colombia and foreign dating for years before finally taking the plunge. However, I try my hardest not to let fear be a factor in my decision making. Broken Hearts recover, money lost can be earned again, and there's nothing more valuable than the memories of huge risk you took in life after overcoming your fear, regardless of the outcome. Just [snip]ing go for it man!!!!
 
By the way, I'm in Barranquilla staying at Jamie's now. There are such a variety of women here that every concern you've expressed isn't really of any circumstance. Do what you can afford to do initially and weigh your options afterwards, but do not let past experiences with a culture of women prevent you from having a ton of new experiences with a another culture of women that's completely different.
 
I have never heard of any man coming to Jamie's and regretting it. Even when it doesn't work out their first or second go-round...they ALWAYS come back.

[aconcepts]

Benjio are you using Jamie's services?


Do you regret taking so much time analyzing?

[htown]

Stevieboy have you ever considered northern Mexico?  I always wonder what is it about Colombia that makes it basically the only latin country that men seem to be seeking to find a wife?  There are like 30 other countries in latin america, afterall. 


Also I'd like to point out that in Houston (where I live) and Austin there are ALOT of women who very recently immigrated to the US and I know for a fact that many of them would love to marry a gringo, maybe even moreso a hispanic gringo like yourself.


Let me just give you a couple of ideas.


Your own city, Austin. 


1.One thing you could do would be to place an ad in the personals section of a local spanish language newspaper stating that you're a middle aged American looking to meet marriage minded women.  I've never tried this but I'd bet money that you'd get more than a few good responses.


2. Another approach would be to start attending spanish mass at a catholic church.  Churches always have little side functions and events like dinners and bazaars for the churchmembers.  Show up and start making friends.  Let them know that you're a single guy looking to meet a good, decent, traditional woman who's looking to marry.  You might be surprised how many people would introduce you to their sister, sister-in-law, friend, neighbor, daughter, etc, etc.


3. Spanish dance clubs and bars.  This may or may not be an attractive option for you.  If you happen to be a partier, drinker, dancer you could definitely go out to the latin clubs and meet plenty of hot single women, and then who knows where it might lead.


Another place that you may want to consider would be Monterrey, Mexico.  I mention Monterrey because I live there part-time and I know the city.  I keep an apartment there and I only pay $3000 mx pesos a month which right now is about $215 usd, all bills paid, cable, internet, lights, everything.  You can fly san antonio-monterrey for less than $200 bucks round trip or you can drive there in less than 8 hours.  Monterrey is a city with a population over 4 million.  The people are very friendly and the women are beautiful, traditional, and humble.  If you can't fall in love there I dont' see how you could fall in love anywhere.


I'm sure Colombia and Colombian women are great, I just wanted to give you some other options that may be a little cheaper and easier for you.


 

[Stevieboy]

@ htown--
You know the cultures around here. I've been Houston many times for work. Austin as you know is very independent women minded and not as many hispanics as you might think.
.
 Let me comment on your ideas:
.
1. I've placed an ad before on latincupid and have actually been on a couple of dates, but the "nortenias", with all do respect, don't look near as pretty as the Colombian or even interior Mexican women I've seen. The closer they're home State is to the border, the higher the probability she'll ask to help bring her family over, or brother or cousins to find work. It's happened to me before, and before I knew it her brothers would call my cell phone constantly. Interior Mexican women are scarce here and usually come from money. I've lived in Guadalajara before, and women there dress different, talk different, and listen to music different than the nortenias.
.
2. The churches you speak of don't exist here like probably in Houston. You're population is 5 fold ours.
.
3. Spanish dance bars. I've tried this and have actually gone with hispanic friends to these places. DANGEROUS! Tejano or nortenio music is what they mainly play, and there's usually fights and cops there at closing. The nortenios wear taco hats and those loud colored, long pointy tipped boots. If I'm not dressed like that, I stand out, therefore, I'm an outsider looking to take one of their women from them, which warrants chingasos.
.
As for going to Monterrey, is it a vacation spot? I'm really only interested if where I'm going, I'm meeting a lady or ladies who may be marriage material.     
.
So by now, with all the helpful info I've gathered on PL, I think I'll take one of these singles tours anyway as a form of vacation. If I don't meet someone significant the first time, at least I had fun doing it. A big plus I hadn't thought of before; I can go on a vacation by myself and have company already waiting for me when I get there. It's unlike trying to find friends or a date to go on a vacation here in the states.   

Thanks, Man, Oh, by the way, are you married? If so, where is she from?
PS. can't thank everyone everytime, but yes, I've read all your comments. Benjio, you're right too. Time maybe to call Jaime.                       

[benjio]

Benjio are you using Jamie's services?


Do you regret taking so much time analyzing?

AConcepts, I came to Jamie's the first time almost 4 years ago. I'm here in Barranquilla for business and I like staying at his place because I can cook instead of eating out everyday, he has a lovely, peaceful garden, and no one bothers me here. I don't know if this is still Jamie's rule but in the past once you paid in full for his introduction service anytime you returned to Barranquilla and paid for lodging he would still set up as many dates with girls as you want. I chose only one girl and I've spent time with her everyday I've been here.
 
I don't regret spending so much time analyzing, but I do wish I had someone like myself telling me things only an experienced veteran would know about dating in Colombia. As much as someone may read on boards like this there are just some things a guy won't fully understand until he hops on the plane and gets here.

[benjio]

3. Spanish dance bars. I've tried this and have actually gone with hispanic friends to these places. DANGEROUS! Tejano or nortenio music is what they mainly play, and there's usually fights and cops there at closing. The nortenios wear taco hats and those loud colored, long pointy tipped boots. If I'm not dressed like that, I stand out, therefore, I'm an outsider looking to take one of their women from them, which warrants chingasos.

Spanish Dance Bars in Houston, Austin and especially San Antonio are EXTREMELYdangerous. They have become the primary locations for violent crime in all three cities. Keep in mind, these clubs are where cartel members working in the U.S. usually come to hang out and unwind. If something happens that rubs them the wrong way they will not for a second hesitate to resort to deadly violence and head straight for the border after they've killed someone. Latino Men have always been an enigma to me. They will cheat on their wives with dozens of other women, but they want to kill any other man that talks to their wife or any of the dozen on the side. The few times I've been to these bars I didn't really see any single women worth my time anyway.

[htown]

Spanish Dance Bars in Houston, Austin and especially San Antonio are EXTREMELYdangerous. They have become the primary locations for violent crime in all three cities. Keep in mind, these clubs are where cartel members working in the U.S. usually come to hang out and unwind. If something happens that rubs them the wrong way they will not for a second hesitate to resort to deadly violence and head straight for the border after they've killed someone. Latino Men have always been an enigma to me. They will cheat on their wives with dozens of other women, but they want to kill any other man that talks to their wife or any of the dozen on the side. The few times I've been to these bars I didn't really see any single women worth my time anyway.

Lmao!!!  Wow, stereotype city!!  What you're talking about does very much exist here but it's only a small fraction of the scene.  Let me mention a few very safe, very nice, very latin spots.


Paparruchos- Two blocks away from the Galleria.  Always an all latin crowd with plenty of super hot Mexicanas and Colombianas.  Not dangerous in the least.  No cowboy boots.


Belvedere thursday night- Latin night is thursday night.  Very upscale.  Very trendy.  The parking lot has mainly new bmw's, mercedes, jaguars.  Very attractive monied crowd. As safe as you'll find anywhere.  No cowboy boots.


House of Blues sat. night- Very upscale.  Very hot Colombianas, Venezolanas, and every other kind of latina.  Extremely safe.  No cowboy boots.


Metropolis-  A little younger crowd.  Not as upscale.  Super hot latinas from central america, Mexico, and south america.  Not as educated, or monied, but just as hot and maybe a little easier.   Plenty of security.  Alot of young latino guys but far from dangerous.  No cowboy boots.


Club Tropicana- Salsa club.  This place is full of super hot latinas dancing salsa, bachata, and merengue all night long.  Safest place you'll ever go to.  No cowboy boots.


I've actually seen goofy looking gringos hanging out at these places and not doing too bad with hot latina chicks.  Even goofy looking asian guys.  Knowing a few dance moves goes a long way.  I could name alot more nice latin places, these are only a few off the top of my head.


If you like colombian food go to Dodo's Chicken and Mi Pueblito on Richmond Ave. right by Jeanetta.  There are ALWAYS hot colombianas there.  And there are at least 5 more colombian restaurants with 5 minutes from there, not to mention the honduran, mexican, and salvadorean places.


My only point is that you don't necessarily have to go another country to find latin america.  If you live in Houston you're already in latin america.  And you actually think that you're safer in Colombia than here?  You better check the crime statistics.


With that being said, I'm personally dying to go to Colombia.  Lol!  I just haven't gotten all my ducks in a row, but I'm trying.

[Stevieboy]

Thanks benjio. It's obvious you know what I'm talking about. Just for disclosure, I grew up in El Paso. For those that don't know, it's yards away from Juarez Mex. I used to party as a kid in Juarez. If a hispanic American kid strayed away from the tourist clubs, they'd get their ass kicked by the locals, whether nortenios or chilangos. It's because of examples like that, that I don't want to land in Colombia and create a stir in some club from some jealous valiente there. Going to jail in a Juarez for fighting is one thing, but in Colombia? No, I'm not looking for a fight (you know who you poor readers are). I shiver just thinking about it. Some might think the fear is over the top, but I've been in dark places before, and I'm too old not to be careful. Don't kid myself, it's Colombia afterall. My mother would slap me silly if I told her I was traveling to Medellin Colombia to look for a wife. She wouldn't understand, and probably couldnt convince her.   
.       
So, from what you say, Jaime's place sounds like the place to be, especially because you can return and get the same treatment. it also sounds safe.

[benjio]

Lmao!!!  Wow, stereotype city!!  What you're talking about does very much exist here but it's only a small fraction of the scene.  Let me mention a few very safe, very nice, very latin spots.


Paparruchos- Two blocks away from the Galleria.  Always an all latin crowd with plenty of super hot Mexicanas and Colombianas.  Not dangerous in the least.  No cowboy boots.


Belvedere thursday night- Latin night is thursday night.  Very upscale.  Very trendy.  The parking lot has mainly new bmw's, mercedes, jaguars.  Very attractive monied crowd. As safe as you'll find anywhere.  No cowboy boots.


House of Blues sat. night- Very upscale.  Very hot Colombianas, Venezolanas, and every other kind of latina.  Extremely safe.  No cowboy boots.


Metropolis-  A little younger crowd.  Not as upscale.  Super hot latinas from central america, Mexico, and south america.  Not as educated, or monied, but just as hot and maybe a little easier.   Plenty of security.  Alot of young latino guys but far from dangerous.  No cowboy boots.


Club Tropicana- Salsa club.  This place is full of super hot latinas dancing salsa, bachata, and merengue all night long.  Safest place you'll ever go to.  No cowboy boots.


I've actually seen goofy looking gringos hanging out at these places and not doing too bad with hot latina chicks.  Even goofy looking asian guys.  Knowing a few dance moves goes a long way.  I could name alot more nice latin places, these are only a few off the top of my head.


If you like colombian food go to Dodo's Chicken and Mi Pueblito on Richmond Ave. right by Jeanetta.  There are ALWAYS hot colombianas there.  And there are at least 5 more colombian restaurants with 5 minutes from there, not to mention the honduran, mexican, and salvadorean places.


My only point is that you don't necessarily have to go another country to find latin america.  If you live in Houston you're already in latin america.  And you actually think that you're safer in Colombia than here?  You better check the crime statistics.


With that being said, I'm personally dying to go to Colombia.  Lol!  I just haven't gotten all my ducks in a row, but I'm trying.

HTown,
 
I don't think you realize who you're talking to. Perhaps we should meet for a beer when I get back to Houston and you'll realize where I come from. I've been all these places numermous times. You're correct on some levels, so perhaps I should have been more specific. I'm talking about an entirely different kind of club.
 
By the way, one of my best friends was shot outside of Metropolis and is handicapp for life because of it. Metropolis is not a Spanish Dance Club. Extravaganza, the mini club inside of Metropolis plays Latin music, but Metropolis is primarily Hip Hop.
 
Belvedere?!!! House of Blues on Saturdays? C'mon man...give me break. We're talking clubs that play Tejano all night, where none of the staff speaks English. Where if a gringo white guy does walk in he's getting stared at like he has [snip] on his face.

[JaxPaul24]

HTown,
 
I don't think you realize who you're talking to. Perhaps we should meet for a beer when I get back to Houston and you'll realize where I come from. I've been all these places numermous times. You're correct on some levels, so perhaps I should have been more specific. I'm talking about an entirely different kind of club.
 
By the way, one of my best friends was shot outside of Metropolis and is handicapp for life because of it. Metropolis is not a Spanish Dance Club. Extravaganza, the mini club inside of Metropolis plays Latin music, but Metropolis is primarily Hip Hop.
 
Belvedere?!!! House of Blues on Saturdays? C'mon man...give me break. We're talking clubs that play Tejano all night, where none of the staff speaks English. Where if a gringo white guy does walk in he's getting stared at like he has [snip] on his face.

 
Man.....  still Benijo some of those places that H-Town mentioned sound pretty nice and definitely not all dangerous and thugged out like Stevie made it sound.  H-town never said to go to the [snip]tiest Tejano bar in Houston.  Things like this discussion are important to make sure people are getting different points of views.  If I just went by Stevie's view on the scene in Houston I would think damn.... Houston is a dump, but H-Town who lives there and you yourself have confirmed that their are indeed some really nice places to go and hit the Mexican and Latin scene.  Damn....makes me want to take a trip down to Houston! I got some old military buddies living there. 

[utopiacowboy]

Spanish Dance Bars in Houston, Austin and especially San Antonio are EXTREMELYdangerous. They have become the primary locations for violent crime in all three cities. Keep in mind, these clubs are where cartel members working in the U.S. usually come to hang out and unwind. If something happens that rubs them the wrong way they will not for a second hesitate to resort to deadly violence and head straight for the border after they've killed someone. Latino Men have always been an enigma to me. They will cheat on their wives with dozens of other women, but they want to kill any other man that talks to their wife or any of the dozen on the side. The few times I've been to these bars I didn't really see any single women worth my time anyway.

My wife and I always go dancing at a club in San Antonio that features tropical Latino music. We've never had any problems - everybody is laid back - all ages and races - enjoying the music and dancing.

[htown]

HTown,
 
I don't think you realize who you're talking to. Perhaps we should meet for a beer when I get back to Houston and you'll realize where I come from. I've been all these places numermous times. You're correct on some levels, so perhaps I should have been more specific. I'm talking about an entirely different kind of club.

You said "spanish dance clubs".  Every place I named is a spanish dance club.  In my post I did somewhat agree with you when I said that Houston definitely does have those dangerous types of places.  I know them very well.
 

By the way, one of my best friends was shot outside of Metropolis and is handicapp for life because of it. Metropolis is not a Spanish Dance Club. Extravaganza, the mini club inside of Metropolis plays Latin music, but Metropolis is primarily Hip Hop.

[size=78%]Metropolis is only hip-hop on thursday night.  All other nights it's all latin, all spanish.  Trust me, I'm a regular there.  [/size]
 

Belvedere?!!! House of Blues on Saturdays? C'mon man...give me break. We're talking clubs that play Tejano all night, where none of the staff speaks English. Where if a gringo white guy does walk in he's getting stared at like he has [snip] on his face.

These are "spanish dance clubs".  I go to these places, I know.  Every thursday night, Belvedere and Saturday night House of Blues are all latino crowd with all spanish music.

[Cam]

htown, does Houston still have the taxi dance clubs? I used to go to these in Los Angeles and they were fun, if you have the right frame of mind.
 
You pay about $30 an hour, pick a lady and dance and converse. Yeah it's kind of prepago-like, but a nice alternative to being alone. I usually found that the ladies were quiet friendly and liked getting a chance to practice English with a Yanqui. Better than a normal night club in some respects, since nobody declines a dance.    I've heard New York has some of these too but never been there.

[Calipro]

Stevie,
 
I can definitely relate to your apprehension because at times I can be a VERY analytical person as well. I researched Colombia and foreign dating for years before finally taking the plunge. However, I try my hardest not to let fear be a factor in my decision making. Broken Hearts recover, money lost can be earned again, and there's nothing more valuable than the memories of huge risk you took in life after overcoming your fear, regardless of the outcome. Just [snip]ing go for it man!!!!
 

http://www.greendroppings.com/2012/05/29/brazil-girl-part-4/


Here is a blog post from a guy that had a lot of apprehension about getting married to his Brazilian girlfriend that lived with him in the States and all he had to do was take her to the local courthouse to get married.


It can be tuff to throw away singlehood when you are getting a lot of good looking tail state side....but something tells me this isn't the case with Stevie.


Stevie


Why not "throw your hat in the ring"....make it official and declare yourself a "wife hunter". There are worst things in life.....I mean you could be an internet dater. jajaja

[Stevieboy]

HA!!! You totally got me on the "online dating" thing. Yes I do?! What? Once you go "international wife hunter" you never go back? Hey, except for the story of that guy getting murdered, I'm already hooked. Actually been very interested for a years like benjio, but wouldn't "pull the trigger".
I think it's time to let em drop   

[Calipro]

"I'll take a woman who can wash my clothes on a rock any day over some educated big mouth."


Look up my posts, read my crap. You'll love it.


Just go down there and own the room.


Life is too short to procrastinate.


I know guys who come here every 3 or 4 months and hang for a long week and get satisfied and then return to masturbation land.CR may be a good place for you to start yiur adventure.


Jeff is right,


Its a lifestyle so to speak.


For me I have made the lifestyle my life.


I am pretty much an old man I turn down opportunities my friends back home would give their left nut for.


I ain;t that old, When I tell the Ticas, hey what do you want with an old man like me - they laugh and say seriously "you are not old."


back in the US I would have to buy a Ferrari and make a full time occupation to get the same women and it would not be as fun.


Come on down and get you feet (?) wet. You will have a better attitude dispues.

http://www.rooshv.com/united-states-of-broken-women


Here is a note worthy rant on American women.

[fathertime]

htown, does Houston still have the taxi dance clubs? I used to go to these in Los Angeles and they were fun, if you have the right frame of mind.
 
You pay about $30 an hour, pick a lady and dance and converse. Yeah it's kind of prepago-like, but a nice alternative to being alone. I usually found that the ladies were quiet friendly and liked getting a chance to practice English with a Yanqui. Better than a normal night club in some respects, since nobody declines a dance.    I've heard New York has some of these too but never been there.

Hi Cam! 
Well that is interesting, I am in the LA area and never knew these types of clubs existed.  When I was single, I'd see no harm in trying to get to know a few ladies and practice Spanish in such a setting, although I suppose it could be a little weird...What has your experience been?
Fathertime! 

[Stevieboy]

Grab a random man off an American street. Take away the penis, broad shoulders, and body hair. Add breasts, a crotch hole stingy with its lubrication, and a tendency for inane chatter that is insignificant to all forms of life two minutes after it’s uttered. You have an American woman. I’m not attempting to be funny: I sincerely cannot feel the difference between the men and women of this country once you take away the clothing and hair. Men look and act like fags while women act like men of yesterday, all to make a lot of money in an office park that contains a Starbucks.

That's precious. It's true....and true no matter what color they are here IMO.
 
Wait for it....Wait for it...someone's gonna get butt hurt 

[benjio]

You said "spanish dance clubs".  Every place I named is a spanish dance club.  In my post I did somewhat agree with you when I said that Houston definitely does have those dangerous types of places.  I know them very well.
 
[size=78%]Metropolis is only hip-hop on thursday night.  All other nights it's all latin, all spanish.  Trust me, I'm a regular there.  [/size]
 

These are "spanish dance clubs".  I go to these places, I know.  Every thursday night, Belvedere and Saturday night House of Blues are all latino crowd with all spanish music.

HTown, I use to be a regular at Metropolis. I stop going when my friend got shot. That was seven years ago so maybe the scene has changed. We should meet up some time. I won't be back in the states until mid-July. I will PM you my contact info if you're interested.

[Cam]

Hi Cam! 
Well that is interesting, I am in the LA area and never knew these types of clubs existed.  When I was single, I'd see no harm in trying to get to know a few ladies and practice Spanish in such a setting, although I suppose it could be a little weird...What has your experience been?
Fathertime!

It's been a decade since I was in LA but there were several taxi dance clubs downtown. Club 907, Las Palmas, Club Fantasy come to mind. Some of these places were dumps but they had friendly girls who liked to dance and flirt. The odd thing was, how many cholos would be hanging around in there watching soccer or playing pool without even bothering to pick a girl. I guess they are there so much they get bored with the same choices all the time?
 
It's kind of an underground scene and it does have a seedy element to it, sometimes the clubs get raided for underage girls working there. It's an avenue for women without skills or English ability to earn a little money and sometimes the line gets pushed too far.
 
I have heard these exist in Houston and New York too. They pop up in places with large immigrant populations. The men are lonely and will go there to talk to a woman while their wife/girlfriend is still in their home country.

[aconcepts]

Why would you pay thirty bucks to talk with chicks?
Do you get laid for the thirty bucks?
 
"I wondered where I could score some of the testosterone she must be injecting so I, too, can adopt a take-no-prisoners attitude that she was taught will get her what she wants out of life. In reality the testosterone is not injected directly into her skin—it’s absorbed by her brain through the culture, which is rewarding young girls when they display go-getting aggressiveness that men used to possess. At the same time it punishes the easy-going, compliant qualities that are necessary to maintain fulfilling relationships and sane households."
 
Well you all know my feelings and even though I found this guys stuff a bit immature (?) he does have some gems. Like the above.
 
The above illustrates the "own the room" concept I describe in another thread.
 
I saw this crap happening in the early 90's. That's when I bailed US women for the most part. Yeah I kept thrashing a few but treated them with disdain and never fathomed a future with them.
 
I feel very sad for those clueless "men" puppy dogs that love to be slapped to sleep, and the immediately slapped for sleeping!
 
Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you guys up there?
 
Me and my Tico crew down here just shake our heads in amazement.
 
American women are men and american men are women. Like I say, the Hollywood whores who dictate culture up there and the same people who cause us to be probed before we get in an airplane.
 
I absolutely frickin loved it when lady gag gag was stopped from playing a concert in Indonesia where she was branded as the devil (She is!). I wish I could have voiced support.Muslims do not have it all wrong you know. Most of their culture is correct, They get a bad rap while the Jewish culture that anchors Hollywood is adored. Something very wrong there.
 
Yesterday I am sitting with this hot super feminine and skinny 23 year old Tica at the Xandari hotel overlooking San Jose and these two gays chicks from the US sit at the table next to us. I almost lost my dinner right there. Then this decent looking dude walks in with his enormous fat old lady. Next table is two couples and all of them are chatting like women. Everybody talking at the same time and no one listening. It made me ashamed to be an American. My Costa Rica citizenship is not too far away. I will proud to be Tico where men are still men.
 
That is until the US pussywhips come down here and ruin it for us...
 
Man I will never go back to that "culture."
 
US culture is an oxymoron. When it comes to women, men there are morons.
 
Tell me why US men do not revolt?