Dress Attire Question

[LatinSharpei]

I am starting to pick up things to wear and stuff for the trip... Is it considered okay to wear khaki dress shorts when going out during the day...I am hearing two things... I have to wear pants all the time and that it's okay if I wear nice shorts NOT GYM SHORTS...  I hear it hot as heck in July and don't want to be hotter than I have to be but I am looking for a cultural answer to this from guy that have been down there...
 
When I go out at night I plan on dressing to impress so don't think I am trying to scum bum this... But I hate being hot if I don't have to be...

[whitey]

Unless you are in your house or hotel, at the gym, at the beach or poolside, walking around during the day in the tourist areas of Cartagena, Santa Marta, or el Rodadero ... don't wear shorts.  You'll look like a clueless tourist.

[whitey]

Except Micky ... he gets a pass ...

[robert angel]

Unless you are in your house or hotel, at the gym, at the beach or poolside, walking around during the day in the tourist areas of Cartagena, Santa Marta, or el Rodadero ... don't wear shorts.  You'll look like a clueless tourist.

AS hot as it is, it's the same thing in the Philippines. If you're a white guy, you might as well glow in the dark.

[Chris F]

I am starting to pick up things to wear and stuff for the trip... Is it considered okay to wear khaki dress shorts when going out during the day...I am hearing two things... I have to wear pants all the time and that it's okay if I wear nice shorts NOT GYM SHORTS...  I hear it hot as heck in July and don't want to be hotter than I have to be but I am looking for a cultural answer to this from guy that have been down there...
 
When I go out at night I plan on dressing to impress so don't think I am trying to scum bum this... But I hate being hot if I don't have to be...

Everyone is correct about this one. It does not matter how hot it is during the day do not wear shorts.

[fathertime]

I wore shorts quite a lot during the days and it didn't create problems for me....now in retrospect I would say it is best not to and here is why:


  During the days if you are out and about, you are likely to run across a lot of attractive ladies.  If these ladies see you running around in shorts they may be less likely to encourage you to approach them.  If you are dressed very nice, you give yourself a better shot at them  being receptive to your advances. 


Fathertime! 

[InnocentVixen]

Thank god for all the advice against shorts, I believe they should be illegal, I don't know what it is about them but even the most attractive man in perfect shape out there can look bad in shorts in my opinion.


I understand you don't want to be hot as it is not only uncomfortable but it doesn't exactly helps you look your best, the fabric can make a world of difference so you may want to pay attention to that while shopping for your trip.

[Brazilophile]

My dos centavos are to dress for the occasion.

If you are trying to attract the attention of pretty ladies, by all means dress well and that means no shorts.  If you are on a date then dress well.  If you unintentionally want to attract the attention of thieves, not only dress well but wear lots of gold colored jewelry as well.

On the other hand, if you are simply going about your business and not trying to attract anyone's attention, then wear whatever you want; Bermuda shorts, gym shorts, Hawaii shirts, tee shirts, etc.  For example, if you leave your hotel or apartment go to a bodega to buy some cold cervazas to drink while watching a soccer game, you can wear whatever you want.

I was sternly warned about shorts for men in Latin America and on EVERY one of my trips ANYWHERE over the past 15 years, local men have worn in public every form of clothing imaginable, and especially the clothing that tourists are warned never to wear.

That said, I dress down a LOT.  When I am planning to meet ladies I dress appropriately.  When not, I dress for comfort and to avoid attention.  I have been pick-pocketed once on a public bus.  I have heard stories of tourists taken for "taxi rides" to ATMs.  I do not rely on randomly meeting women on the street due to being well dressed, and neither should you nor anyone else.

[braziliangirl]

My dos centavos are to dress for the occasion.

If you are trying to attract the attention of pretty ladies, by all means dress well and that means no shorts.  If you are on a date then dress well.  If you unintentionally want to attract the attention of thieves, not only dress well but wear lots of gold colored jewelry as well.

On the other hand, if you are simply going about you business and not trying to attract anyone's attention, then wear whatever you want; Bermuda shorts, gym shorts, Hawaii shirts, tee shirts, etc.  For example, if you leave you go to a bodega to buy some cold cervazas to drink while watching a soccer game, you can wear whatever you want.

I was sternly warned about shorts for men in Latin America and on EVERY one of my trips ANYWHERE over the past 15 years, local men have worn in public every form of clothing imaginable, and especially the clothing that tourists are warned never to wear.

That said, I dress down a LOT.  When I am planning to meet ladies I dress appropriately.  When not, I dress for comfort and to avoid attention.  I have been pick-pocketed once on a public bus.  I have heard stories of tourists taken for "taxi rides" to ATMs.  I do not rely on randomly meeting women on the street due to being well dressed, and neither should you nor anyone else.

I'm with Brazilophile. I live in one of the warmest cities in Brazil and everyone here use shorts (or how we call them bermudas, we use shorts for really short shorts, which I would never look good on a guy). The younger ones use board shorts, the older dress or jeans shorts. Just don't wear high socks, never! It screams tourist.

But of course, habits in Colombia may differ a lot... If you have to use pants, they you may want to use linen ones for hot weather.

[V_Man]

You are going to Cali. Yes it may be a little hot (makes no difference that it is July).
However it is not appropriate to wear shorts in almost any situation.

You can wear them around the house when not expecting visitors, when next to a pool or when excercising. Otherwise, to them you will look like somewhere between a boy and a stupid gringo. There is no law against it - especially since you are a gringo but you will definately be looked at as a bit of a moronic gringo. Zero class.

The only time I wore shorts or sneakers in Cali was when I went for a run around the park. Even when relaxing on the family finca I did not wear shorts.

You can buy thin cotton pants or spend up large on those special fabric trousers to keep cool. The only thing I found uncomfortable was the need to always wear leather shoes, because they don't breathe. Hence consider some boat shoes or something that looks nice but is still breatheable.

[Disclaimer: I live in a place with a climate similar to Cali so you may struggle more than me.]

If you are staying in a hotel then I assume it is airconditioned. If you are staying in someone's house then unless it is estado 6 it probably will not be airconditioned. This is not usually an issue because the temperature cools at night to a plesant level.

As a general note. The people in Colombian cities like Cali and Bogota are in some ways a little more civilised than your average laid back westerner. They pay far more attention to personal grooming, dress, etc. For example you will be expected to have a manicure. I was told this before I went but I didn't really believe it. Well by the second or third day my new girl took me along to get a manicure and the following week it was a manicure and a pedicure.

So you see while you are wondering if you can get away with wearing shorts when not on a date, her expectations of your personal appearance are twenty times more sophisticated.

[Brazilophile]

So you see while you are wondering if you can get away with wearing shorts when not on a date, her expectations of your personal appearance are twenty times more sophisticated.

 This has become a deal breaker for me. 
 
 The gist of most posts is that we need to be hyper vigilant about how we present ourselves because "her expectations of your personal appearance are twenty times more sophisticated".
 
 In this same forum, we have more than a few threads about insecure Latinas engaging in violent, almost psychotic, behavior; Latinas who refuse to learn English while in the US and refuse to care for step-children; Latinas who date other men while claiming to be faithful to their US boyfriends; and a long thread about Latinas being "prepagos".
 
 I personally have never preferred appearance over behavior.  I much prefer a plain looking, plain dressing woman who has an honest character, pleasant personality, an even tempered disposition, and is capable of giving and receiving love to a gorgeous woman who takes excellent care of her appearance but lies, steals, is physically violent, is verbally abusive, and is unloving.
 
 If a woman's order of priorities for a man is manicures and pedicures over Spanish (or Portuguese) speaking ability, willingness to work hard, smart and careful with money, caring and loving towards her and any children, then that woman is NOT for me.  Frankly, given the current, and foreseeable, economic environment in the Americas, getting involved with such a woman may be a disaster in the making.
 
 I was going to relate a story but it became too long.  Anyway, I assume that at least some of the posters here are in the 99% who need to work for a living, and that includes keeping up on your skills, on the new developments in your field, and on the new developments in related fields so you can collaborate intelligently with others.  Especially if you work in IT, a field that changes and evolves faster than any other, you need to keep up with new hardware (iPads etc.) , the new operating systems that control that new hardware, the old applications that must be re-worked to adapt to the new OS's, and developing new applications for the new hardware. 
 
 If you get involved with a woman whose values and priorities will cause you to be distracted by appearance concerns such as manicures and pedicures, then you court disaster.  Computers permeate the lives of everyone who lives in an advanced economy and none of them are concerned about anyone's appearance.  Computers are only concerned about the code they read.  I am told that for those who work in IT falling too far being the leading edge makes you unemployable. 
 
 The current and foreseeable economy is not one in which to risk becoming unemployable.  Stick to women whose priorities are in line with current reality and who meet OUR expectations of their behavior.  IMHO, get involved with women who focus primarily on appearance at your own peril.
 

[Bob_S]

From my travel experience, shorts are effectively outlawed in almost every country outside of the U.S. (with very few exceptions), and even then only acceptable below certain latitudes (in So Cal shorts are considered semi-formal attire).  Just don't pack 'em, period, especially if you are going to meet women.  And if you're going to whine about how uncomfortable you'll be, just remember that the women you are going to meet aren't wearing those sexy leg-shaping high heels because they like the arch support.   

[Micky]

Thanks Whitey,  appreciate the pass.
 

I guess the do not wear shorts advice is good.  I only know Med and here the wearing of shorts has increased over the last few years.  My brother in law,  Edwin,  a high end dentist,  now wears shorts most of the time.  I do wear jeans for baptisms,  weddings and funerals.  The rest of the time its shorts.  I do not care one bit if anyone likes it or not.  I walk a lot,  all over the city,  not the worst barrios (12 of October, Popular,  etc.)  but barrios were you could not find a gringo with a search warrent,  in four and a half years I have never had a problem.  Just working class people,  I am no threat to them,  and they are no threat to me.  I do agree with the guys that have first hand knowledge of the other cities,  if shorts are a no-no there, then by all means do not wear them.  I am old and lame and go with BP,  if someone wants to look at me, or judge me negatively,  BECAUSE I am wearing shorts,  probably not a person I care to chat with anyway.  My philosophy is "be yourself,  or be by yourself".  I doubt that at the time of my death I will give any thought to what I wore during my life.  What is this post about?
 

Micky

[V_Man]

Yes but Micky you live there. It's your life style. This guy is going for a short trip to meet some women.

"I am told that for those who work in IT falling too far being the leading edge makes you unemployable.  "

Absolutely true but even IT people are capable of looking after their apperance when the inspiration strikes. 
 
 "Stick to women whose priorities are in line with current reality and who meet OUR expectations of their behavior.  IMHO, get involved with women who focus primarily on appearance at your own peril."

Like everything it is a matter of degrees. I established an intimate relationship with my girl before I let her take me to get a manicure. I let her know that compared to her I am a little bit wild and savage. I explained to her that I come from many generations of wild savages. That doesn't mean I don't use a folk or iron my shirts.
The bottom line is that it does not threaten my identity to act like someone she can be proud of in social settings. She does not live in an estrato 6 guilded cage.

It is possible for a woman to have good priorities and still want her man to look good. I could counter that if she shows no interest in how you present yourself then that is a worse sign.

Expectations of behaviour are a two way street.
My grandfather said:
"If you don't want to be disappointed, don't have expectations."

He was illerate but always was a master at the simple truth of things.

[fathertime]

It is possible for a woman to have good priorities and still want her man to look good. I could counter that if she shows no interest in how you present yourself then that is a worse sign.

 

I have dressed like a slob most of my life sort like micky (no offense)...in the last few years, my wife has slowly switched out my wardrobe 2-3 pieces of clothing at a time...I had no idea what style was or that style even existed.  I would still say I'm not really stylish, the change has definitely been good for me.  Now my children are less embarrassed to have me in the stands of their sporting/school events! 


Fathertime! 

[Jeff S]

Every obese women I've ever talked to has had this exact same philosophy:

if someone wants to look at me, or judge me negatively,  BECAUSE I am wearing shorts overweight, probably not a person I care to chat with anyway.  My philosophy is "be yourself,  or be by yourself".

How many potential great guys walk right by them just because they're obese that they'll never get a chance to meet?


Whether it is right or wrong, people judge us by our appearances, especially if it is things we have control over, like our weight, attire, hair, piercings, skin art, and grooming.


For those of us who are married, we realize that our wives stopped judging us on our appearances long ago, so we don't have to concern ourselves as much about these things. However if you are on the hunt, and are looking for a woman who takes care of herself and looks good all the time, three guesses on how you should present YOURself. (the first two don't count.)


I used to dress well when I was single, mostly because everyone else did and I was expected to. That was when people dressed a lot nicer than now. I think I worked for 10 years before I came to work without a full suit, dress shirt and tie on - when the concept of casual Fridays started. Nonetheless, like Fathertime, my wife, let's say "steered" me to wearing more stylsh clothes. It isn't expensive and certainly not uncomfortable to look nice. The important thing is that women notice these things. You may be barely conscious that you're even wearing shoes, but every women you walk by knows what kind of shoes you're wearing, when the last time you polished them and makes value judgments about you based on them. Same with the type of denim in your jeans, what kind of shirt you're wearing and if it's pressed, how your hair is trimmed, your fingernails, and on and on.


So you may think you don't want to meet someone who judges you by your appearance or clothing, but you just cut out the majority of your potential dating pool.


But that's just the way I look at it. You're free to look at it any way you wish.

[JaxPaul24]

 
I have been there twice in the last year I wore shorts everywhere depending on the occasion of course. Cali, Barranquilla, Cartagena and Santa Marta, I wore shorts all the time. In fact I can't even imagine not doing so because it's too damn hot to be walking around in jeans and leather loafers! Hahaha.... I have never had any problems or any funny looks that I know of because I wore shorts. I was even in some barrios in Cali that look like something out of National Geographic. My best friend (From Cali) wore shorts all the time too. Maybe it's a different for me because I'm Latino and I can blend in a bit easier but honestly I don't really think anyone really cares....
 
Now I don't wear flashy things. I don't wear flashy Nike "Jordan" shorts or tops. I wear solid colors of Nike shorts with solid white or colored shirts. I'll wear lots of cargo type shorts with a nice Golf Polo or T-Shirt. I also don't wear flashy tennis shoes. This last time I took a pair of solid black Reebok Zigs and they were great comfort for my feet.
 
As for the Ladies.....I got plenty of compliments all the time on my laid back attire especially from the younger gals in their early 20's. I think I even mentioned this in my trip report on Barranquilla. As for the one's that didn't like my attire....well I didn't even notice. Just depends on the guy I think, if you're walking around looking like a tourist then yea you'll probably stick out more wearing shorts.
 
You can still look sharp, clean-cut, confidant and respectable while "rockin" some shorts in Colombia!
 
JaxPaul Out!

[Micky]

Jeff -

 
I understand your point and do not disagree with the crux of it.  Not a very good comparison though changing "shorts"  to "overweight".  Take just about any real physical beauty and it does not make THAT much difference what she is wearing,  Just as you could take any super lard azz and whatever tent they wear will not make much of a difference.

 
I am six feet,  178 lbs,  33 inch waist.  I am always as neat and clean as can be when out and about,  never have been out the door in sandals.  My statement about "being judged"  was a little bit of BS,  being that I have NO idea what people think,  but was honest about the "I do not care one bit"  part.

 
Not to get too far off the topic.  I do agree with guys giving the advice about the mode of dress.  Long pants and [snip]s with buttons on it.

 
Micky

[Jeff S]

I realize that obesity and dressing down aren't anywhere near equivalent - and wasn't trying to compare the two. I was just pointing out to the many of the unmarried readership that, like a fat chick automatically cuts herself off from a big proportion of the potential dating pool, so a guy wearing a worn out Metallica tee shirt, cargo shorts and flip flops, automatically cuts himself off from a huge percentage of the single ladies out there, both here at home, and even more so in other countries - no matter how poor the countries are. In the US, dressing sloppily and looking like you just got out of prison is chic - well, let's say trendy, even out to a nice restaurant . Elsewhere, people will be laughing at you. For us married guys to hang out in grubbies is one thing. If you're out looking for a relationship, or a wife, though, it's not a very wise tactic.

[InnocentVixen]

I am not the typical latina and prefer a man who is clean, wears clothes his size and can hold a decent conversation vs. a man in designer clothes wearing almost the whole bottle of the most expensive aftershave he can find and likes to party like there is no tomorrow... but quite honestly? even if I am not a fashion guru and can sometimes miss the obvious, I will notice if you are wearing something that looks good on you, whether is an expensive designer thing or not.


The most common mistakes I've noticed, even if a man is actually wearing nice clothes are:
-washed out clothes (learn to let go!)
-wrinkled clothes
-lack of structure (too much / too little fabric) <--- this one guys is sooo important, if you are in great shape the clothes will not make you justice and if you are overweight but have the right clothes on you will still look decent, I know tailors are expensive in the states, but at least try on different brands so you can find a closer match to your body shape.

[Micky]

IV -
 
VERY well explained.
 
Micky

[benjio]

I am not the typical latina and prefer a man who is clean, wears clothes his size and can hold a decent conversation vs. a man in designer clothes wearing almost the whole bottle of the most expensive aftershave he can find and likes to party like there is no tomorrow...

DAMN!!! I always knew I had little to no chance IV, but I guess you just etched it in stone! LOL!!!!
 
That aftershave wears off after like two hours...I have to put the whole bottle on!

[beginthebeguin]

Benjio I agree. Aftershave that they make these days stink (bad pun). And after the first hour it is practically gone. Why back in the day, my father used Old Spice exclusively, not the new stuff, the old formula (Pre-1975) and you could always tell when he was in the house after coming home from work. jajajajajajajaja   

[Researcher]

I am not the typical latina and prefer a man who is clean, wears clothes his size and can hold a decent conversation vs. a man in designer clothes wearing almost the whole bottle of the most expensive aftershave he can find and likes to party like there is no tomorrow... but quite honestly? even if I am not a fashion guru and can sometimes miss the obvious, I will notice if you are wearing something that looks good on you, whether is an expensive designer thing or not.


The most common mistakes I've noticed, even if a man is actually wearing nice clothes are:
-washed out clothes (learn to let go!)
-wrinkled clothes
-lack of structure (too much / too little fabric) <--- this one guys is sooo important, if you are in great shape the clothes will not make you justice and if you are overweight but have the right clothes on you will still look decent, I know tailors are expensive in the states, but at least try on different brands so you can find a closer match to your body shape.

  Great advice IV. Same things my wife says.


     Researcher

[LatinSharpei]

Great Advice... This really helps for when I got shopping for my clothing... Very good points!!!