One trip of 4 weeks or Two trips of 2 weeks

[V_Man]

Hi guys!

I have 4 weeks leave owing.
For a first timer, would it be best for me to take 2 trips of 2 weeks or one trip of 4 weeks?
I would like to see a little of Colombia as well as do the wife hunting thing.
One catch is that it will take me 2 days to get there and 3 days to get back.
I have a good friend in Cali and so I'll start there.
I was thinking Cali and the coffee region for some tourist activities and to hang with my friend. I may go on a date or two in Cali but it would be low key. Mostly I'd just enjoy myself hanging out with my friend. Also that will help me understand more about the culture, how to stay safe, how to get around with my limited espanol, etc, etc.
I was thinking Bogota for wife hunting. I was thinking Bogota because:
(a) 8 million people hence there should be a few options for me.
(b) read good things about an agency there
(c) I'd like a motivated, educated latina.

I prefer the look of the women of Medellin but after reading all the negative comments here I am wary of that whole scene.
It is more important that she be kind, patient and loyal than be super hot looking.
If I have time I may just stop by Medellin for a couple of days to see what the city is like.

I am looking for someone in their 30s without kids.

I'm not expecting to make it to the coast. If I did it would be just a night in Cartegena or something like that.

I can read Spanish but can not speak very well at all. I can dance a little and I enjoy it.
I know a little bit about the culture but I've never been to Colombia. I consider myself to be far too trusting and not very street smart. Having said that I enjoy being an independant traveller and I've survived thus far.

What else can I tell you that would be relevant?
If I went for 4 weeks I could not go again until next year sometime.
If I do 2 x 2 weeks I could go twice this year.

I wont cry if I don't do too much travelling around. If I only have 2 weeks I'll visit my friend for a few days and then spend the rest of the time wife hunting.

[Gato4Astrid]

Hi guys!

I have 4 weeks leave owing.
For a first timer, would it be best for me to take 2 trips of 2 weeks or one trip of 4 weeks?

I would advice you to take 2 x 2 weeks trips rather than 1 x 4 weeks trip.

1)  If you find the lady of your dream, it will be awful long time to see her again if you had selected the 1 x 4 weeks
2)  If you didn't find the lady of your dream, it will be long time for you to go there again
3)  If you do not like Colombia, you wouldn't want to stay 2 extra weeks
4)  If you love Colombia, you would be able to go back in 6 months time
 
The disadvantage of 2 x 2 weeks is that the 1 x 4 weeks trip would only save you the cost of the flight and length of travelling
 

[benjio]

Hi V_Man,
 
Welcome to Club Colombia (which is also a Colombian Beer...jejeje).
 
I agree with Gato...I'd do the 2 trips for 2 weeks instead of 1 for four weeks. The bad thing is you'd have to pay to get there twice as Gato stated, and I guarantee you will not want to leave after two weeks, whether you find a girl or not. Cali is a great place to start searching for women. A ton of beauties there and they are usually pretty down to earth girls as suppose to a lot of Paisas. Bogota is also a good place but please realize that Bogotanas, for the most part, do not look like most other Colombianas. I don't know if there's a higher content of European DNA in the blood of the women in Bogota, but they're just not very "shapely" women. Please don't get me wrong...there are some very beautiful women in Bogota. And as you said a lot of them are educated and you'll even find a few that know English very well. However, what most of us gringos expect in terms of the physical attributes of a Colombiana will generally not be found in Bogota in huge numbers. That is of course a preference. I myself am an assman, but it's not that important to some other guys. Happy Hunting!

[mudd]

two 2 week trips,
start with Bogota then go from there.   i would suggest a week in Bogota and maybe a week in Barranquilla.  if you find somebody you like and hit it off, then go back.


if you don't, then plan another trip to Cali or  Medellin, Manizales or Preria.


also, their are some small towns outside Bogota with some really cute women, so that's an option.

[Traveler]

Why not keep your options open?  Buy a ticket and plan a two week stay, but if you really hit it with a girl, or you like the place, or you want to visit all three major cities, you can just call the airline and change the dates.  There will be a fee, but it will be far less than a new airfare.
 
The longer you stay, the more opportunities you will have to meet and date girls.  You will feel comfortable, get better in your Spanish.  And most importantly you will have a chance to meet people and make friends, which will really open the country to you.  People in Colombia rotate in their social circle.  That's how friends are made and most importantly, women meet guys.  Very few women use agencies, or go to clubs without a guy accompanying them.  Staying longer will give you an opportunity to improve your language skills and meet friends who will introduce you to their social circle, after which it should be smooth sailing.  You will have a LOT more opportunities to meet women, learn the culture, and have new cool people in your life.  Many women, especially the type that you seem to be attracted to the most (more upper class, professional, etc) virtually never date men outside of their social or family cirlce, or join agencies for that matter.
 
Also, I agree that Medellin or Cali has better quality of women, even though Bogota being the capital attracts women from all over the country including those cities.  Bogota also is for the most part not pretty, cold, rainy and can feel depressing, and the costs are higher.  And it will be a lot harder to penetrate the social circle in Bogota - not impossible, but it will take a lot longer, and you don't have that much time.
 
See if you can do a month, and maybe take another two weeks in six months down the road, even if it is not paid.  Of course it's a question if your employer will be pleased with that  .

[fathertime]

I like the idea of keeping your options open like Traveler said.  Since travel is such a huge ordeal given that you are traveling from Australia I’d really consider the 4 week option to cut back on all those days spent in airports.  If you are like many people and you really hit if off with a lady, you will find a way to sneak in another trip somehow/someway, earlier than you expect to.    Some people truly won't be able to make that second trip in a reasonable time frame, if you know for certain that would definitely be the case with you, then  you do have to factor that in.
Fathertime!

[dennislevy]

v man

I think we have had this discussion before.

If the caleña is just an amiga and there are no expectations....and its mportant for you to meet her you ve got Cali and maybe one other location in two weeks. If you and the caleña hookup and there is romance and sex...you´ll be in Cali for two weeks...you can take that to the bank...jejejeje  unless you cut and run...and you will lose that relationship.

If SHE is  definitely NOT the woman you are looking for as a wife......then it should be obvious, spend a few days with her... and then HIT the road... the question is...Does SHE know what your intentions are?

There are guys who believe that getting in a social circle is important, personally for me  it works in only one way.  If a woman who I like and who likes me presents me to her circle as her special amigo or her novio and that is what we have agreed to...I ll meet her circle.

But I am not going to get passed around a circle as..look, I met this gringo...he didn t do anything for me...maybe you ll like him....Been there, done that a couple of years ago in Bogota.....if youi do it, you re going to spend time and money, meeting women you wont fit with and you dont have enough time for that.   

Better that YOU make the choices as to who YOU want to meet. They may or may not want to meet you...but at least you ve taken your shot.

Knowing what I know, if I were going to be  an agency client again, i wouldn t use any agency but Jamie s in Baranquilla or Consuelo in Bogota. if you want to use Consuleo s agency and endure Bogota...then what has been written is true, it s cold at night, it s rainy...and the air is polluted...and its crowded.  but there are a lot of availalbe women....especially if you combine a dating site cupido AND the agency...

In ten days you should be able to meet 20 women easily...if you re up for that.

What I always liked about Bogota was the variety of women...there are women from all over Colombia who come ot Bogota to make a career or to escape their small town...or both, as well as for other reasons.

if you want to do Bogota, I ll help you as much as I can,  I think I wrote you some private emails...and I ll give you places to stay...unless you want a hostal, you are not going to do much better then say 80 or 90,000 pesos for a good room...call it 45 to 50 USD and it will be a ways from Consuelo. But even with taxis, it wuill be considerably cheaper then booking a room in North Bogota.

Cali and Bogota are two very different worlds......and if you spent time in both...in two weeks you can make a judgement about those cities...but that s only a small slice of Colombia....Colombia is so much more then the big cities.

If those are your only two choices....the 2X2 is short because of the traveling and the 1X4 allows you to meet more women...but will a woman hang in for a year without seeing you? 

WHATREVER LENGTHOF VACATION YOU CHOOSE , BEFORE YOU COME TO COLOMBIA AND IF YOU HAVENT DONE IT ALREADY..... CHECK AUSTRALIA IMMIGRATION POLCIIES FOR REQUIREMENTS ABOUT FOREIGN FIANCEES MAKE YOURSELF KNOWLEDGEABlE BECAUSE........... MAYbe A WOMAN WILL COME TO AUSTRALIA TO BE WITH YOU....BASED ON SAY.... TWO WEEKS WIT HER.... (IF YOU DO the 1X4, CHEMISTRY AND LOVE)  AND A LOT OF CHATTING BETWEN YOUR VISIT AND WHEN YOU BRING HER TO AUSTRALIA.

An alaternate suggestion? will  your employer let you do 1x3 and 1x1?
 
Good luck! keep us posted....

Dennis


   

[Traveler]

Dennis,
 
Much of what you say is good sound advice, as always, but I can't agree with several things.  First, if the guy realizes quickly enough that the girl is not for him, why does he need to "hit the road"?  What is your obsession with constant traveling?  If he goes for example to Cali, and the girl he was hoping to develop a relationship with is not working out, he can stay in Cali and meet other girls there.  Why does he need to go to another city?
 
One does not need to rely on social circle to meet women in theory if he is open-minded.  He can go to Centro in Medellin, and just meet girls walking around there asking for directions for example.  However, V Man has indicated that he wants not just anybody with a nice smile, but a polished professional women, and with no kids on top of that.  That is frankly a rare animal, and I doubt he will meet a lot of those just approaching them spontaneously in the street.  Those women have jobs, travel in private vehicles, live in closed guarded communities, and go out to private parties where they are invited by their friends and family.  How else can he meet them besides trying to get into their social circle?  Agency should be viewed as the last resort, b/c limiting your choice in Bogota, a city of 9 million, to maybe half a dozen women is doing yourself a serious disservice.

[mudd]

What I always liked about Bogota was the variety of women...there are women from all over Colombia who come ot Bogota to make a career or to escape their small town...or both, as well as for other reasons

ditto


best  gf or wife material is in Bogota, but that's just my opinion

[whitey]

ditto


best  gf or wife material is in Bogota, but that's just my opinion

There are great women everywhere in Colombia.  What varies is the relative proportion of women possessing the qualities you are looking for ...

[V_Man]

Hey guys this is all really awesome advice from everyone. Also in a way it is good to know that some experienced guys say go once and some say go twice. That tells me that I am on the right track in my thinking and not just wondering about inconsequential things.

OK a little more information is probably relevant given what you guys have said so far. The Calena is definately only a very good amiga. Even if in the unlikely event something did develop with her it would definately not be a casual fling. We know each other a lot better, a lot closer and for longer than you are thinking. We have already talked about who she might set me up with. She will also help me with other women in other ways as well. This could be a plus but also can have pitfalls. Hence I'll spend some time with her but not all my time.

My boss would much perfer me to take 2 smaller trips than to take 4 weeks off. There is no way I can take 2 weeks off and then hope to extend my stay because I find I'm enjoying myself. My time is often fully booked a month in advance. The money for 2 trips is an issue but maybe not a deal breaker. The travel time is a concern.

I'm on CC and I know enough Spanish to be able to set up a date for myself.
However I really don't think I will have the time to set more than a very few myself. I'm in a very different time zone for one thing.

Also as I said my actual conversational spanish is way behind my reading abilities. I think I'll need translation help once I get past basic introductions, etc.

Hence I can definately see the value in an agency. I have not read any consitent recommendations for agencies in Cali or Medellin. But Consuelo has had good reviews in Bogota.

If I was there for 4 weeks I'd think about short trips to some other cities. There is another woman in a smaller city that would jump my bones if I came within 500km of her! Even if didn't visit her there are indeed some cuties online in those smaller cities. Or it would be possible to visit Medellin. Alternatively it would be nice to just do some touristy things outside the 3 largest cities. I can always go back and hang out with my friend. In other words if I'm bored in Bogota/wherever there would be other options.

If I go for only two weeks at a time I wont have time to be bored. Plus that will force me to focus on wife hunting.

OK so that's a local friend, my independant efforts plus an agency. 3 avenues that I will use. From all I've read I should be able to meet a couple of women after all that effort. 

If I went for 4 weeks I'd plan the first 2 weeks and then leave the last 2 weeks flexible to see if anything developed. If I went for 4 weeks I suppose it is theoretically possible for me to find a way to get back there for Christmas. Although money would be a major issue then so it's not guanteed at all.

I think after 2 weeks of trying to speak Spanish everyday my head might hurt. Also it is not guranteed that my boss will allow me to have the 4 weeks off all at once. We are "in negotiations" you might say.

If I went for 2 weeks and I did meet someone really nice. Then I could chat with her long distance and know I'd be back again 2 months later. So that could all work out very nicely. However since when has anything gone to plan? Still it is possible. I think it's unlikely but I guess it's possible and would work out great.

I had not thought of the 3 weeks and one week. I'll tuck that idea away and mull it over a bit. What you may be forgetting is that I will be jet lagged as well. So after I arrive it will take 2 days or so for me to be fully functional. That's almost 2 days to get there, jet lag for a bit plus almost 3 days to get back. I'd only be fully functional for 2 or 3 days. It could work if I was going that week to only see one lady.

As you can see my problem is I have far too many options.
Also every option has money issues for me but is not impossible.

[fathertime]

Well V=man based on what you have written, I now think two 2 week vacations is the better option.  Don't worry about being jet lagged, I remember travelling to the Ukraine which was also an enormous trip from LA and the excitement of being there made the jet lag go away rather quickly. 


Given what you have said about your substandard Spanish, I'd definitively consider using an agency at least the first time you to Colombia. 


Being SO far away really does complicate things, it would seem that 1 week is just not worth the effort. 


In the future you may have to get additional time off to make this latina wife-hunting expedition work best, but that is down the road some.  For now just get over there and get in the game and see how much you enjoy it, you figure out the rest afterwords.


Fathertime!

[dennislevy]

V man


yes the 1X3 and 1X1 wa sbased on the suppostion that you found someone in three weeks and went back to be with her for 1 week.


If you can do 2X2 and the second trip is two months alter that could work....a reasonable woman should be able to hang in in for 60 days until the man comes back.


Traveler, my point about hitting thwe road was based on V mans comment that he wanted to see some other cities in two weeks.


If the amiga in Cali wants to introduce him ot her friends in Cali...thats certainly an option....but if V man wants to do an agency...there isn t anything or anyone in Cali that would take care of him....and that is just my opinion.  I don t think hittong on women in CCs or in shopping malls is a way to find a wife...its based on visual appeal....there is no up front qualification......the man gets some phoney number so its a waste of time....and there is no connection, hes chasing ghosts..




Ithink there has to be a connection and some sense of obligation. ...a friend of someone or common membership in an agency or some communication on cupido and messenger and skype before a face tio face cita.....


One of Consuelo s strongest selling points si that her show up ratio for first dates is way higher then any agency in Bogota. the agency creates a sense of obligation. She personally makes sure that the dates are confirmed because she sits next to her asssitant who is making the calls.   In six monhs or so, I met 34 women from her agency, and only ne was a no show on the first date.  Granted, I lived in Bogota and I spoke p Spanish. 


The woman has to feel some sense of obligation....and I don t think that happens if a woman is hit on in the  street or a mall.


V man, keep thee psots coming.

[Traveler]

Dennis,
 
I do agree that communication prior to meeting is great, but it should not lead to an obligation, but to attraction.  Dating based on obligation is not fun - for neither party.  This will have all the romance of a pre-arranged marriage.
 
And there are other places to find women in concentration besides malls, BTW.     And what's wrong with "visual appeal"?  It is called chemistry, and there other ingredients to this besides the looks, but there is absolutely nothing wrong to be attracted to a woman before you get to know her life story and invested hours into chatting with her.  And why do you think that a woman you met spontaneously, had a mutual connection with, cannot later become your GF or wife?  That's how everyone met before the internet was invented, for centuries and thousands of years, unless thwarted by culture or religious tradition.  That's how women dream of meeting a guy - spontaneously, out of the blue, destiny sending one their way.  That's romance, and women are romantic, especially colombian women.  Why do you think they always dress to the 9's whenever they step out of the house?  To be ready for this to happen! 
 
Obviously, this approach requires time and language skills that most people lack, and I understand that. 

[JimD]

but if V man wants to do an agency...there isn t anything or anyone in Cali that would take care of him.....

Dennis that simply isn´t true. The allcolombiangirls agency in Cali accross from Chipichape is functioning just fine. It is a "brick & morter" agency where you can go in person and make introduction dates with girls in Cali. A nice feature of the website is a page that shows the most recent sign ups, last twenty or so, so you can head directly to the new girls who stand no chance of being  jaded by endless unproductive dates with gringos.
In the last couple of years this board has evolved to focus exclusively on an agency in Barranquilla run by a gringo. It seems like a serios case of "tunnel vision" has ensued. It´s ok by me, the more I can have the caleñas to myself the better but should a case arise where a new guy is actively discouraged from seeking his "media naranja" in Cali in order to swell the coffers of a gringo in Barranquilla well that in my opinion would spell a sad degeneration of integrity hear abouts.
But back to the question at hand yes two two week visits are the best choice.
 
 
 
 

[Catamaran]

I'd opt for taking the entire four weeks at one time.  The reason for suggesting this is that a two week visit will go by extremely fast.  It would also be less expensive eliminating the need for a round trip ticket.