Introduction - Hey Everybody!

[jb]

Hello All,

I am so happy to have found a community with a great amount of knowledge, wisdom, humor, and advice at Planet Love.  Listening to everyone has been sooo helpful in the month or two since following P-L, and I hope to be able to add if in some small way.

Well a little about myself.  Not sure what to say so here goes.

35 single male, never married, no kids.  parents still married, only child.  Never dated after high school.  Had a girlfriend in high school for a couple of years into my first year of college, but i really didn't have a clue then about how to treat a lady or appreciate her for who she was etc. 

About 3 years ago I finally took the opportunity to hang out with a woman i had interest in.  We hung out for about 2-3 years with a mixture of what seemed like dating, being friends, confidants, best friends, but never really a couple relationship. It helped define somethings of what i want and what i don't want, and it also helped in the personal growth process. Thankfully I've continued to grow and have had some major perspective changes that are good to have before searching for a life partner.  Both in religion and perspective on sex, not necessarily related though.     whether i meet someone now or years from now, i feel i can contribute to a loving nurturing relationship with the right woman. 


As for what I am looking for in a life partner: a woman who loves me for me, who's natural disposition is feminine, who's loving, kind, sincere, playful, physically attractive, sexy, communicative, younger, smart, desires to be with, faithful to and support her man, desires to be a mother, ...

When i first heard about international relationships i was super excited bc i was bumbed thinking i wouldn't be able to experience the type of relationship i wanted for marriage.  But when considering a partner from abroad, i could see it as reality.

I was drawn to Latin women because I understand them to be family oriented.  I was drawn to Colombian women because well, they got that extra something in the sex appeal department.     and because they may be less experienced (frequency of partners) in sex due to a family oriented culture and high influence of the Catholic Church.      cough, cough.  uh, after reading on this forum and learning about the culture of Colombia, I have a better understanding on this subject.  O.K so i was naive, very naive.  Yet, for me i haven't fully resolved this issue for my own life let alone what i would truly feel comfortable with in a life parnter.  I'm a virgin in the technically strictest sense, but does that really matter.      I used to think that it was right to wait until marriage, but now i look at things from a different perspective, not so black and white.  yet I would prefer to find someone with whom i'm compatible however that works out.       

As far as right now, I'm looking to find/start a new vocation or mode of income that will allow me to earn a U.S. based income yet work from anywhere in the world.  I look forward to this coming to fruition.  It'll be great!
I would love to travel South America, and probably relocate to there if i found the right spot.

The last part of October I'm planning a trip to Barranquilla Colombia, probably with an agency due to my lack of speaking Spanish combined with connections made online.  I'm just starting, but know i don't want to wait to make my first visit, and have already postponed from this July.  The way i look at it, I'll start my search in BAQ but won't exclude anywhere even the U.S. if i meet the right woman.

I've very much enjoy reading the wisdom and fun on this forum.
Hopefully this intro gives you some insight into my history, desires, and timeline in this process.
Any questions feel free to ask and especially any advice (vocationally or otherwise), please do share.  it's definitely needed.

[Jeff S]

Hi jb and welcome. I was in my 30s when I found my foreign bride and it was my first and only marriage so far. I'd traveled a lot before then and had relationships with quite a few women, though, in the US, Latin America, Asia and Europe. The best advice is to take things slow and easy. Keep your wits about and think with the big head and you'll do fine.  Looking forward to your participation.


- Jeff

[robert angel]

JB,
 
Welcome aboard. Sounds like you're picking up pretty good on the 'learning curve' here. Keep coming back and bring any questions you might have. Eventually you may be the one dispensing good advice!

[dennislevy]

welcome abroad.....we re here to help you.

[Researcher]

   Hi jb, thanks for posting and welcome to the board!


      Researcher

[maritime04]

thats good that your planning a trip, try to come down as often as you can, and learn spanish. its a new and diffrent culture so do not be so rash to judge. Colombians have something speacial in their ablity to take joy in life and strength from their family; despite poverty and family fueds.
 
Everyone deals with life diffrently so good luck in finding some one

[InnocentVixen]

Hi Jb, welcome to the forums,
I want to wish you the best of luck in your search and to advice you to read the forums archive throughly, not only the latin ones but the asian ones as well, you are not as naive as you think, it's just that it is usually certain type of guy that is attracted to latinas, even if they are very different some go the same route and end up having similar experience, that does not mean Asia is the land of saints and Latin America the one of sluts.


I remember I once read an intro of this very smart young man that was going to start his search in Colombia, he said that he wouldn't be surprised women over there have slept with hundreds of guys due their good looks and being "hot blooded" he was naive in my opinion, a good woman that respects herself might make a mistake or 2 in her life, but will not sleep around for fun, one that has over 10 "mistakes" just shows lack of good judgement or that she is not mature enough to admit she is not ready for something serious or maybe that she just likes variety a bit too much and is not marriage material.


You might also keep in mind that most latinos are "catolicos de palabra" which means they say they are catholic but don't attend church, some might not even know how to pray.


If you no longer plan on waiting until marriage, just be careful down there in Colombia, experienced guys can feel like kids in a candy store in their first trip, can't imagine how it would be for you if you add the novelty of sex... well actually I can, that is why I say you should be careful haha.


On a side note, have you considered other places in latin america like Peru? those girls have my respect, never met one but have heard nothing but positive things about them.

[maritime04]

I call it "cathloic hypocrisy", but i am not too rash in judgment of anyone especially the underdogs, and they way i see it, Colombian women have a tough fight in life. nothing is a given for a barrio girl.
 
as i once heard
 
"if your born a gir your damned, if your born ugly your double damned, and if your unlucky to be pretty its triple damned"
 
Colombian guys can be [snip]s, and if a gringo wants to come down and marry a colombiana and wants to be a faithfull decent human being more power to you. the best of luck.
 
 

[Gato4Astrid]

jb
 
First of all, welcome to the board.  I wish you the best of luck in finding your future wife.
 
Do not worry too much about learning Spanish at the moment.  Just be yourself and learn when you can and when you have the time.  When you have found the lady, you can start learning her language.  You might find a Filippino or a Japanese, then you do not need to learn Spanish!

[jb]

Thanks IV for the very thoughtful advice and welcome!

I was wondering if reading the Asian forum would be a good idea.  i will now.

On a side note, have you considered other places in latin america like Peru? those girls have my respect, never met one but have heard nothing but positive things about them.

that's a great question.   recently i've started to loosen the blinders a bit, as initially I settled on Latin America after looking at the usual places around the world, eastern Europe, Asia, and Latin America, and then settled on Colombia as on the whole i was physically more attracted to the women in Colombia. 

Your question is great because it reminds me to keep and open mind and to keep focused on the qualities i desire regardless of geographical location.    Two examples.  A friend of mine knows a guy who moved to Guatemala and ended up with a European woman, while another guy found a wonderful Latina who moved up here to the US.

I plan to travel to Peru so who knows.  Also plan at some point to travel to Ecuador, Bolivia, Costa Rica, and possibly Brazil.  So who knows where, but i definitely plan on enjoying time in Colombia later this year regardless of whether i meet someone or not.
 

[jb]

Maritime, it's been good reading this forum to understand it's definitely a different culture and to not superimpose what i'm used to on it as correct per se.
 
 I do remember enjoy reading your perspective of things as it was slightly different than others down there.  It's nice to have such a diversity of experience and opinions.
 
 Gato4Astrid, thank you.
 
 

The best advice is to take things slow and easy.
 

noted, thanks Jeff.
 
 
 To those i haven't greeted yet, Thank you all for the welcome, Researcher, Denis, and Robert.
 
 

[raycjs]

welcome to the board
 
 
best of luck to you
 
Ray

[InnocentVixen]

A friend of mine knows a guy who moved to Guatemala and ended up with a European woman, while another guy found a wonderful Latina who moved up here to the US......
Also plan at some point to travel to Ecuador, Bolivia, Costa Rica, and possibly Brazil.  So who knows where, but i definitely plan on enjoying time in Colombia later this year regardless of whether i meet someone or not.

Great attitude jb, I am sure you'll do great, hell you might even meet someone before actually start looking, have fun in your trips~

[maritime04]

yeah i try to be honest and fully admit i may be little "off", but it is what it is. The best of luck to you, i am sure the guys here have alot of advice and Exp. to learn from.

[Colgando]

Hey JB, loved your intro, I look forward to reading about your adventures, like Nike, just do it! 

[whitey]

Welcome JB and good luck ...

[jb]

Hey Ray, Colgando, and Whitey.
thanks