Birth Control opinions in Colombia

[jvoorhees]

Being a largely Catholic country, I am curious about the cultural norms toward birth control in Colombia.  Especially since I get the impression that Colombians are not shy about sex.
 
Do Colombian women usually prefer using a condom, the pill, the rhythem method, or something else?  How does that differ for begining dating sex vs married sex?

[Gato4Astrid]

Jason, the most simplest and safest way is to use condoms!   (and obviously not wearing hockey mask)

[jvoorhees]

Jason, the most simplest and safest way is to use condoms!   (and obviously not wearing hockey mask)

I think that depends on the level of the relationship.  When I begin a relationship, I would strongly prefer condoms to prevent for other things beyond pregnancy.  But if I am lucky enough to marry a Colombian, I'd really like to not have to wear a condom every time for the rest of my life.
 
I guess my question, maybe poorly worded, was to understand if Colombians are much different from Americans generally when it comes to birth control.  I'd hate to make a false assumption about their culture without knowing.

[maritime04]

Cathloic Hypocrisy, among the general population birth control is not preached or taught very often. but the cutlure of regaton, drnking and partying leads to alot of sex. not uncommon to see women at age 21 with 2 kids from 2 diffrent men. its a problem there. abortion is illegal. colombian men do not like wearing condoms, and many women do not mind it but you can find some responsible women who insist on condums and use birth control, it could be that these things cost money and many colombian men can not afford it, or they just act like pigs, and do not care. regardless its a problem.
 

[El flaco]

Being a largely Catholic country, I am curious about the cultural norms toward birth control in Colombia.  Especially since I get the impression that Colombians are not shy about sex.
 
Do Colombian women usually prefer using a condom, the pill, the rhythem method, or something else?  How does that differ for begining dating sex vs married sex?

I think I remember reading on Jamie's web site that most women in Barranquilla do not use birth control so as Gato said you have to take responsibility.  In Colombia like many other places the further you move up the economic ladder the more likely women are to use birth control.


Colombia recently passed a new law to expand the use of birth control.


http://articles.latimes.com/2010/dec/12/world/la-fg-colombia-birth-control-20101212




Brazil has been subsidizing birth control for years.

[JimD]

The monthly injection birth control costs $14.000 or about eight dollars but as the poster above said Colombian guys are not inclined to pay for it. Of course dropping a hundred and fifty or two hundred thousand at a disco Friday night is perfectly reasonable.
Many many girls in Colombia get prenant at fourteen or fifteen. The really young age is more common in the pueblos but plenty of big city girls get pregnant at that age too. I saw a statistic somewhere for unwed mothers in Colombia but don´t remember where. I do remember it was impressive. You see plenty of eighteen year olds with a kid in the agencies, eighteen being the youngest age they´re allowed to sign up at.
 

[AndyLee]

I agree with JimD. The figure I read a while back was 72% of colombian women are single moms. Very similar to the percentage of black women in US who are single moms.

[whitey]

Just in the last 4 months, two young ladies (21 and 23) at the bank where my wife works became pregnant and are getting married to their boyfriends.  These are women with good jobs, university education, and disposible income.  Seems like birth control wasn't very well managed for these two at least ...

[Gato4Astrid]

colombian men do not like wearing condoms,

and they refuse to pay for to support child too!!

[dennislevy]

Two VERY good methods for birth control in Colombia.
 
1. Dont date..............guranteed to be 100 % baby proof 
2. oral sex.................also guaranteed to be 100% baby proof
 
jejejejejeje

[maritime04]

allot of dead beat dads in Colombia, its like responsiblity just scares the [snip] out of em or they run like rabbits. You can find so many single women. i have often wondered and seen somethings that makes me believe thats it not just the guys fault, but that does not give enough reason to abandon your child, for years at a time.
 
for example my girls sister has a child by a man who has litteral not even bothered to call for more then a year, he does not care about his daughter at all, needless to say he does not provide anytime of support. he did a few years ago allow her to work in a repair shoe shop for 12 hours a day for like 70 mil a month, and wanted sex on the side,  that was his version of child support.

[chameleon]

The state doesn't enforce child support?


God knows I hate condoms, but I suck it up and wear them. I'm not ready for babies (and I'm 31) and don't want any accidents.

[braziliangirl]

allot of dead beat dads in Colombia, its like responsiblity just scares the [snip] out of em or they run like rabbits. You can find so many single women. i have often wondered and seen somethings that makes me believe thats it not just the guys fault, but that does not give enough reason to abandon your child, for years at a time.
 
for example my girls sister has a child by a man who has litteral not even bothered to call for more then a year, he does not care about his daughter at all, needless to say he does not provide anytime of support. he did a few years ago allow her to work in a repair shoe shop for 12 hours a day for like 70 mil a month, and wanted sex on the side,  that was his version of child support.

And yet people ask why Latinas are looking for foreigners. I don't know much abut Colombia, but it seems like the situation is similar to Brazil. Most guys think that taking care of the kids is the woman's responsibility only. Even the married ones. And even if both work.

[braziliangirl]

The state doesn't enforce child support?


God knows I hate condoms, but I suck it up and wear them. I'm not ready for babies (and I'm 31) and don't want any accidents.

Chameleon,

If it's like here, most of those women can't afford a lawyer or don't know how to access the resources the government can provide. Some of then may even think this bad attitude is normal, since they may have been raised that way or seeing such things happening everywhere.

[michaelb]

The state doesn't enforce child support?

I don't know what the law says, but defacto they pretty much don't.

[chameleon]

Chameleon,

If it's like here, most of those women can't afford a lawyer or don't know how to access the resources the government can provide. Some of then may even think this bad attitude is normal, since they may have been raised that way or seeing such things happening everywhere.

Hmmm.... I guess I never thought about it. Up here, if you don't pay, it's pretty easy for a woman to have the state garnish your wages.


I'm curious though... I know what the marriage agencies tell us (that all latinas want a foreigner), but how many women actually think about it as opposed to just living their lives? Is it something you talk about amongst yourselves? Do women use sites like LAC/CC to meet guys within their own countries? Or is pretty much everyone on there hoping to find a foreigner?

[braziliangirl]

I'm curious though... I know what the marriage agencies tell us (that all latinas want a foreigner), but how many women actually think about it as opposed to just living their lives? Is it something you talk about amongst yourselves? Do women use sites like LAC/CC to meet guys within their own countries? Or is pretty much everyone on there hoping to find a foreigner?

From what I've learned here, Brazil is very different from Colombia in that way. So it would be more helpful if one of the member's Colombian wives or novias answered your questions.

Not so long ago in Brazil, most of the women that married foreigners were prostitutes gringos met while doing sex tourism. Now with internet, things changed a bit but there is still the stigma. So, I don't see many Brazilians talking about wanting a foreigner. And I don't really think everyone on here is hoping to find one.

I guess Brazilian girls didn't learn yet how different gringos can be. By what guys tell here, it seems like most Colombians are aware American men can be a good option over chauvinistic Latinos. (I'm sure that doesn't describe the totality of guys there, so I believe not even in Colombia everyone is hoping to find a foreigner.)

Even having some contact with foreigners before because of my job (which is nothing like the kind of contact or job mentioned above!), I just started thinking about looking elsewhere when a Venezuelan lady, who sat beside me on flight from Bogotá to Caracas, noticed my hand without a ring and advised me to do that and told how nice her daughter's American husband was.

[AndyLee]

Good feedback BZG. I'm of the opinion that on Latin Americna Cupid and Colombian Cupid both that the majority of the men are Latin. I only did a brief scan of Colombian Cupid but there are only a hand full of gringos living in Colombia. So that leads me to believe that Colombian women are looking at Latin men as much or more than they are looking at gringos. That's just an idle observation on my part. There are of course thousands of gringos living in other countries, but as has been pointed out here countless times, the average Latina would rather meet and marry and live in her own country rather than have to relocate to a strange country to find the man.


BTW, BZG, your tag line is by one of my favorite American writers. Have you read a lot of his work? I've actually visited the cabin where he lived without possessions for two years. He is one of the reasons I chose to leave the US with only what possessions I could fit in three suitcases.

[chameleon]

From what I've learned here, Brazil is very different from Colombia in that way. So it would be more helpful if one of the member's Colombian wives or novias answered your questions.

Not so long ago in Brazil, most of the women that married foreigners were prostitutes gringos met while doing sex tourism. Now with internet, things changed a bit but there is still the stigma. So, I don't see many Brazilians talking about wanting a foreigner. And I don't really think everyone on here is hoping to find one.

I guess Brazilian girls didn't learn yet how different gringos can be. By what guys tell here, it seems like most Colombians are aware American men can be a good option over chauvinistic Latinos. (I'm sure that doesn't describe the totality of guys there, so I believe not even in Colombia everyone is hoping to find a foreigner.)

Even having some contact with foreigners before because of my job (which is nothing like the kind of contact or job mentioned above!), I just started thinking about looking elsewhere when a Venezuelan lady, who sat beside me on flight from Bogotá to Caracas, noticed my hand without a ring and advised me to do that and told how nice her daughter's American husband was.

Thanks for the insight. Your english is very good btw. How did you learn it?

[braziliangirl]

Thanks for the insight. Your english is very good btw. How did you learn it?

Lots of willing to work towards something! 

I started studying English when I was 13. Like many people here, I went to English school two times a week for six years, it was good for learning grammar and to read, but I just became capable of writing and speaking more fluently when I needed for work and decided I should train my ears too. I started to read technical books in English, but I realized if it could be more fun, so I also watched movies without subtitles and tried to write down song's lyrics. Even with years of study, it was very hard in the beginning, but it didn't take long to feel more comfortable with the language.

I'm sure it's easier when you are immersed and really have to speak the language. So, don't worry, it may take a lot less time for a girl to learn once she gets there.

Btw, thank you for the compliment.

[maritime04]

"I'm not ready for babies (and I'm 31) and don't want any accidents."
 
I am 30; and looking forward to starting a family, i live the single life in Medellin for 5 years, and ready to settle down. but i can understand why you think your too young, but put it another way, if you wait till your 40, you may have a 18 year old daughter when your pushing 60, might prevent you from beating up her boyfriends.
 
The dating agency's are sticly foreigners but i def. see how Colombian men whould use the online sites as well.
 
I do not think all colombian women want to marry foreigners and leave Colombia even barrio girls they are soo attached to
1. lifestyle there
2. family friends
3. the culture
4. their MOTHERS
 
some are willing to leave but i dont think its in the 1000s
 
Colombian women can only report him and if they catch him the corts try and make him pay up; but that doesnt happen to often its easy to just dissapear in Colombia
 

[chameleon]

"I'm not ready for babies (and I'm 31) and don't want any accidents."
 
I am 30; and looking forward to starting a family, i live the single life in Medellin for 5 years, and ready to settle down. but i can understand why you think your too young, but put it another way, if you wait till your 40, you may have a 18 year old daughter when your pushing 60, might prevent you from beating up her boyfriends.
 
The dating agency's are sticly foreigners but i def. see how Colombian men whould use the online sites as well.
 
I do not think all colombian women want to marry foreigners and leave Colombia even barrio girls they are soo attached to
1. lifestyle there
2. family friends
3. the culture
4. their MOTHERS
 
some are willing to leave but i dont think its in the 1000s
 
Colombian women can only report him and if they catch him the corts try and make him pay up; but that doesnt happen to often its easy to just dissapear in Colombia

I don't want to wait until i'm 40 either, but I definitely want to enjoy being married without kids first. It's hard to travel to Europe and eat in nice restaurants, or go to Africa, with an infant. I want to do all that stuff with my wife before a kid enters into the equation.

[jb]

I don't want to wait until i'm 40 either, but I definitely want to enjoy being married without kids first.

by chameleon

wow Chameleon, you read my mind.  I definitely agree with you about traveling/enjoying being married first before children.

I'm 35 so my time table is a little different than yours.  Actually when i first thought about it, 60 years old (as maritime04 mentioned) got me moving.  I decided i wanted kids, figured it might take about 5 years to find someone, see if it was right for marriage, give myself a couple year buffer if it wasn't and had to start over.   plus i would love to travel for a couple years and build a solid home (in the relationship sense) with my wife before kids.  Once i figured I could be about 60 when they graduated high school, i decided i needed to start looking pronto!  But realistically, i'll enjoy each moment, not rush.   enjoy the adventure of meeting someone, and if i have kids i'll enjoy that too.

if you wait till your 40, you may have a 18 year old daughter when your pushing 60, might prevent you from beating up her boyfriends.

  by maritime04

maritime04, what do you mean?     when i'm 60 i plan on being able to beat up my daughter's boyfriends, and i also plan on making sweet passionate love to my wife regularly at 60.       If in the event i have a daughter at that age, i'll have her brothers beat up the boyfriends when i'm 80.  haha

[maritime04]

having kids is a huge commitment of time and money; I understand about traveling and enjoying life as a married couple before having kids.
 
many married couples choose not to have children, and thats ok. I have had to do alot of thinking about what i want in life, and as much of a lifestyle changer it is, i want children. not right away, if i could live forever then time would not be a problem but since sadly one day i will die, i had atleast develop some plans or time frame, i realize life can toss unexpected things but i would like to
1. have a loving wife (be married) to some one who can be a great mother
2. have a stable home in a good area
3. good job
4. money saved up
5. be ready for kids