pulling the trigger

[Bob_S]

I'm stealing that for my FB quote of the day.    

[robert angel]

Yea Bob, that's it--the serenity prayer--for hopeless romantics, punch drunk in love guys, heck for plain old drunks trying to stay sober--for anyone really--that one's a charm.

It's 'public domain' --so run with it--we all could use it a bit I think.

I don't recall that last line in the version you make mention of, and I think they might not want to include that--especially if they're carrying it in their wallets or purse. But nonetheless, at times, I think we've all had various ideas of how utilitarian a 55 barrel of hydrochloric acid can be!

My wife doesn't recite that prayer, but sometimes I make her so mad, she threatens awful things briefly and I do wish she'd add that one to the novena she recites every Wednesday. Might improve our mileage.

Thank God, she usually doesn't stay pissed of at me for too long! I couldn't blame her if she left me, and I'd get a lot more extra curricular activities in besides, but I'd wish her all the health and happiness in the world. I'd just still love her, remember the good times and try to focus on them, and I'd miss her, along with a few pieces of electronics, some furniture, some cash and a car, but that's all replaceable, while she's 'one of a kind' for sure.

Nothing's forever and 'live and let live' I say. After five years together and few being close to each other before that, she's hanging in with me, but if I got on her last nerve, or her on mine, I'd want no caged, not to mention chronically unhappy, bird sharing my nest.

For now, we're balancing the "For better or worse" part of our vows pretty good...

[thekfc]

“God grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, The Good Fortune to run into the ones I do, And the Eyesight to tell the difference.

And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today as they be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.

And help me to remember...When I'm having a really bad day, and it seems that people are trying to piss me off, that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4...to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me! Amen."

And lord, please help jm21-2 to stop worrying so much. 

[z_k_g]

And lord, please help jm21-2 to stop worrying so much.  

Amen kfc!!

But......That's not gonna happen!!!

God made everyone different, makes the world a more interesting place!!

Based on his previous trip reports and other posts, he's got as much chance for success (or failure) as anyone else.  If his observations are spot on, I think he's got a pretty decent woman, so he's got some good odds for a great marriage!

Zulu

[jm21-2]

I think we'll be fine overall. Just a lot of lifestyle adjustments and unknowns for both of us.

I think I need to get some boat projects done before we get married and she ties the purse strings shut for boat projects, haha. They're basically all to ensure she has a good experience boating anyways (or as she would put it, seduce her into sailing). Installing a regular head instead of a porta-pottie, building a large custom berth near the wood stove, better light fixtures, etc.

Just got to make sure there's enough money for a nice honeymoon or there'll be hell to pay....

[Capstone]

They're basically all to ensure she has a good experience boating anyways (or as she would put it, seduce her into sailing).

You may be surprised by how much she ends up liking being out on the water. My wife had never really done any type of 'outdoor' activities before we married but now she is always bugging me to take her fishing. Ever since we went fishing for the first time she has literally been 'hooked' ever since. She has even gotten to the point now to where she baits her own hook which is very surprising to me. But she really does like being out on the water now whether it be a river, lake or ocean.

Just got to make sure there's enough money for a nice honeymoon or there'll be hell to pay....

I am kind of surprised by this but I guess that is one of the differences between Taiwan & China in that Taiwan has adopted many of the western aspects of a wedding where as in China a honeymoon is pretty much still unheard of for the most part. How about engagement/wedding rings - are they common in Taiwan? My wife is the only one amongst her friends who has an engagement and/or wedding ring.

[throwawaydad]

PING Robert
Stop making your wife angry.  Reminds me of an old joke...

Guy goes the Doctor..."Hey Doc, it hurts like h3ll when I do this" (waves giant circles above his head with his arm).

Doctor says to patient..."Don't do this anymore" (waves giant circles above his head with his own arm).

Sorry for the thread drift.

[jm21-2]

You may be surprised by how much she ends up liking being out on the water. My wife had never really done any type of 'outdoor' activities before we married but now she is always bugging me to take her fishing. Ever since we went fishing for the first time she has literally been 'hooked' ever since. She has even gotten to the point now to where she baits her own hook which is very surprising to me. But she really does like being out on the water now whether it be a river, lake or ocean.

She actually likes being outdoors. We were outside all day except for late in the evening pretty much. I think she'll like it a lot, but it does get pretty cold here at night out on the water, and I don't have a shower on my boat (no good way to install one either). So that could cause some problems. V-berth is also on the small side but there are a couple ways I could make a larger berth out in the salon. Also, there's a little Island near where I live that's all park and just got electricity. Can plug in the electric heater and you get pretty amazing views of the Seattle skyline.

Problem is that private yacht ownership is illegal in Taiwan and it's a very strange concept to her. And she's gotten sea sick a few times. She also is somewhat allergic to mosquitoes which would be a problem in some places. Though I think there are a lot less mosquitoes here compared to Taiwan generally.

I am kind of surprised by this but I guess that is one of the differences between Taiwan & China in that Taiwan has adopted many of the western aspects of a wedding where as in China a honeymoon is pretty much still unheard of for the most part. How about engagement/wedding rings - are they common in Taiwan? My wife is the only one amongst her friends who has an engagement and/or wedding ring.

I think that is just her. She loves to travel but couldn't care less about weddings and rings. The honeymoon will be one last splurge before settling into frugal married life. She is hoping to travel around a bit to Cambodia, Laos, and maybe a couple other countries while the visa process is finishing too. I don't know how common honeymoons are in Taiwan but Taiwanese don't seem to travel abroad much, so I think she might be an exception.

I think if I bought her an expensive ring she would actually be pretty upset at me wasting money. She doesn't want any rings and doesn't want a wedding, but I think my parents will insist on the wedding. I think wedding rings aren't all that common in Taiwan but the weddings can be pretty darn elaborate. I'm wondering whether to buy some simple gold bands or just forget it.

[jm21-2]

Update:

Wow, what a long frustrating process.

So when we first filed processing times were looking pretty good, looking at the stats on VJ. Since then there seems to be at least a month added on to the average processing times. I was hoping I could get the NOA2 in November but now it looks as though it might be December or even January.

She held off on getting a car because she thought she was flying back to Taiwan fairly soon, which has been a real inconvenience for her. The unpredictability of our timeline is really getting to her. She's also very lonely in Australia and not able to put much in savings. It just so happens that airfares from AUS to Taiwan start skyrocketing in mid-November and don't go back to normal until mid-January. So if she doesn't fly back soon then she probably won't until mid-January. The packet is going to her mom's house though and in the off-chance it came in December or early January it would be nice if she was there.

We haven't seen each other in over 5 months now and are both really missing each other (we met the second time towards the end of May, but she wasn't ready to file until the end of August). It's now looking like it could be another 4-5 months before this process is finally over.

So we talked this weekend and it's looking like she's just going to fly back to Taiwan early and wait there at her mom's house. I'll make another visit at the end of November/beginning of December. I had planned a trip in October to AUS but we decided to bag it because it looked like things might move quickly and we wanted to save more money for when she moved here. It is looking so long now though that another visit with her will help tide us over and should look better for the interview. I will probably also bring an inexpensive engagement ring which might help at the interview too (I figure anything that helps, why not?).

I hired an outside bookkeeper and we've been having lots of problems with software incompatibility and corrupted files. Haven't paid myself in the last two months due to not knowing how much I can take out of trust accounts. But would need to book tickets soon. Sigh... fortunately had a lot saved anticipating taxes and her moving here. Will probably sell my boat to help.

To the newbies out there: this is not a cheap, quick or easy process.

[thekfc]

Update:

Wow, what a long frustrating process.

So when we first filed processing times were looking pretty good, looking at the stats on VJ. Since then there seems to be at least a month added on to the average processing times. I was hoping I could get the NOA2 in November but now it looks as though it might be December or even January.

I think that there is a backlog now at USCIC especially CSC. But you never know when that NOA2 will come in.

To the newbies out there: this is not a cheap, quick or easy process.

Patience....they will need it.

I wonder how piggy's progress is going along? His initial though was to "read" up on the process after he return from the PI.

[Capstone]

Yes, the time waiting for the petition approval can be very frustrating to say the least. Mine took about 6 months to get approved and then another 3 months before the visa interview took place. Try to turn what at first seems like a negative into a positive - the extra time can be very beneficial. Take the extra time to prepare as many things for her eventual arrival as you can - put a new coat of paint on the bedroom, buy a new bedding set, get those needed small appliances (electric tea kettle, rice cooker, etc.), make as many preliminary wedding/honeymoon arrangements as you can (not easy to do when you don't have a date but you can at least maybe decide on where and how you will do it). There are all sorts of things that you can be doing which will make her transition once she arrives much easier - her initial impression/experience of things will probably be an important component of her adjustment to life here.

If you can swing another trip, go for it - you can't take too many in my opinion. Just keep in mind that all the waiting will be more than worth it in the end.

[thekfc]

YTake the extra time to prepare as many things for her eventual arrival as you can - put a new coat of paint on the bedroom, buy a new bedding set, get those needed small appliances (electric tea kettle, rice cooker, etc.), make as many preliminary wedding/honeymoon arrangements as you can (not easy to do when you don't have a date but you can at least maybe decide on where and how you will do it). There are all sorts of things that you can be doing which will make her transition once she arrives much easier - her initial impression/experience of things will probably be an important component of her adjustment to life here.

That is what I am in the process of doing.
I am making space for her things, clearing out the "thing" that I do not want.

I am debating between putting a fresh coat of paint or wallpaper. They put up some beautiful wallpaper at my job & if I can find that same wallpaper in the color that I want - I will go with the wallpaper plus I do not really like to paint when it is cold.

I am getting all household items that I currently do not have - for kitchen, bathroom, etc.
About a week before my wife arrives - I will do grocery shopping for the perishables - I will buy the non perishables gradually ahead of time.

I am also looking at airfares for first time immigrants & when the times comes, I will have her book the ticket on her end as it will cheaper than if I book it myself.

[jm21-2]

Yep. Trying to get some things done. I bought my house in May and have been slowly working on projects. Fortunately my birthday was just here and for bday/xmas presents my family is helping me out with some house projects. Will be finishing repainting the interior, replacing a fixture or two, and most importantly (and expensively) replace some very old crappy carpet in the bedrooms with some faux wood flooring. Fortunately my dad was able to get the flooring down in OR on sale with no sales tax so it was about half the price as up here. She wants to have a say in a new bed though so that's waiting.

We're looking at Hawaii for the honeymoon probably. Kind of cliche but it's fairly inexpensive (for those living near Seattle) and will have nice weather. Looking for a nice weekly house rental on Maui or Kaui. Craigslist has some deals that seem good.

I will probably take about 10 days at the end of November and beginning of December and fly to Taiwan. Just needed to check my work computer and make sure I didn't have anything scheduled. Looks clear so everything is good to go at this point.

I wish I could find this brand of Japanese matcha powdered tea she likes but the only store I can find that has it is in CA and is in a different packaging so I'm not sure if it's the right one. Will probably order some and cross my fingers.

Not sure I need to do much about foodstuffs since I have a lot of Asian ingredients on hand already and she's just learning how to cook. I noticed a little Asian grocery store opened about 3 blocks from my house but when I went to check it out it was closed. I started cooking Chinese and Japanese food in middle school or so, so I have a nice selection of cooking implements. Wish I had a nice gas range but nothing I can do about that. I've got some portable butane burners I use on my boat that are at least a little better than electric....maybe if I install a better hood on the range I could set some outdoor style high BTU propane burners inside, though it would look like crap and is probably dangerous.

Will probably have someone come in and do a deep cleaning of the house a week or so before she gets here.

[Capstone]

I am also looking at airfares for first time immigrants & when the times comes, I will have her book the ticket on her end as it will cheaper than if I book it myself.

Have you by chance noticed if airfares originating in the PI are lower than the same flights which originate in the US right now? I bought my in-laws some tickets last week (for a mid February departure) and found that their flights which originate in Hong Kong were a little over $200 less than the same flights/route which originates in the US. I was pleasantly surprised by that.

[thekfc]

Have you by chance noticed if airfares originating in the PI are lower than the same flights which originate in the US right now? I bought my in-laws some tickets last week (for a mid February departure) and found that their flights which originate in Hong Kong were a little over $200 less than the same flights/route which originates in the US. I was pleasantly surprised by that.

Yes I did check & it is. Also tickets bought in Phil are cheaper than if I buy them in the US (for the same flight).

For first time immigrants (via a travel agent in the P. I.), EVA Air, Korean Air & Asiana Air all gives a fare between $515 - $575 ~ PI to NYC o/w for travel in Late Nov to early Dec and just a little bit more for travel in January. China Airline & Cathay were just a little higher.

[Dave H]

I think she'll like it a lot, but it does get pretty cold here at night out on the water, and I don't have a shower on my boat .

Hey JM,

I lived in Florida...so I don't know much about cold water.  

There are a number of simple ways to at least take a deck shower on a boat. You will find these products at camping, boating, and department stores. I have used 3 main methods on boats, camping, and after hurricanes...that I can remember.    The "Sun Shower" is quite common. It warms in the sun, hang it up and grarvity does the rest. I can't remember the name of the second, but it was a flat, black rubber bladder that I bought at a boat show. You filed it with water from a hose or faucet through the discharge hose. Placed it in the sun to warm. The pressure from the expanded rubber bladder (looked like half a basketball when full of water) expelled the water at a nice pressure when the bladder was sitting on the floor or ground. I have it here somewhere in one of my boxes. If I ever find it, I will tell you the name. The third that I can  remember was a five gallon bucket of water (can warm in the sun or on a stove.) I usually fill it about 3/4's full, then add boiling water. Then I place in my Coleman battery powered shower and enjoy! There are also portable propane and DC water heaters and shower tents. With a little imagination, you can make your own creations. I could never figure out why Filipinos take cold azz showers. I created a hot water heater here using garden hoses.  

Dave

Gravity Showers








Coleman Battery Shower




Pressurized Showers






Water Heaters and Water Heater-Shower Combos






Shower Tents

[jm21-2]

Hm. Eva is a Taiwanese company. Will have to look into cheaper fares bought in Taiwan. Might the lower prices have something to do with taxes? Or maybe just smaller demand?

Dave,

I've used sun showers many times. My parents use them on their boat all the time. They extended the hose on one, hang it from the boom, and pipe it into the bathroom below through a window. My boat doesn't have the proper draining equipment for a similar setup though.

The water flows south along the pacific coast, so we get that wonderful Alaskan water. There are a couple pockets protected from the current that get pretty warm though. All up in Canada I think so I don't go to them much.

In any case, I put the boat up for sale today. Will see what happens. The moorage is going to become difficult after she gets here and I could use a few extra grand in my pockets right now. My parents retired up here and they have a small dock that's too shallow for a sailboat, but I may eventually go in with my dad on a small powerboat and put it at their dock. But maybe no boat for next year.

[thekfc]

Hm. Eva is a Taiwanese company. Will have to look into cheaper fares bought in Taiwan. Might the lower prices have something to do with taxes? Or maybe just smaller demand?

jm, there are "hidden"  air fares/classes that are not published or given to people outside of the host country. My friends here in NYC tell/have their family (who are in HK & Singapore) buy the ticket there for them, they save a few $$, sometimes $$$.

Take a look at this link - that is for the  P I

http://www.santraphael.com/home.php

$372 for a 1 way ticket from Manila to LA/SF for Dec travel. Try finding that fare here in the USA.

You should look/ have your girl look into it from her end in Taiwan - have her try different travel agencies if she have the time, she should find something comparable/similar.

[Jeff S]

Maybe you could build a boat. Lots cheaper and more fun than buying one.

[jm21-2]

Maybe you could build a boat. Lots cheaper and more fun than buying one.

I don't think I'll have the time, especially after she gets here. My dad is thinking about it though. They met a guy who had built a 20' or 22' power catamaran that my dad was pretty impressed with. Used boats are so cheap here right now though that it's hard for me to think too much about building. I saw one fairly decent brand of boat (c-dory) that was being offered for free if you bought the used outboard that was on it. Needed to rebuild the transom is all.

[Jeff S]

Well, you know whereto send him.....

[piglett]

I don't think I'll have the time, especially after she gets here. My dad is thinking about it though. They met a guy who had built a 20' or 22' power catamaran that my dad was pretty impressed with. Used boats are so cheap here right now though that it's hard for me to think too much about building. I saw one fairly decent brand of boat (c-dory) that was being offered for free if you bought the used outboard that was on it. Needed to rebuild the transom is all.

A friend of mine in Delaware just sold his ChristCraft, it had a 4.3 Chevy inboard & only had 47 hours on it.
YES 47 original hours & it was the anniversary edition which had a lot of little freachers that they are not even putting on their new boats. I think new that boat is 30k he got 9k for his. He had already sold his F350 so he no longer had a vehicle to tow it to the boat ramp down the street so he decided it needed a new home.


pig

[robert angel]

The best boat to use is SOMEBODY ELSES boat.

I don't mind springing for gas and food if it's somebody else's boat.

Sure,  I'd like a boat big enough to run out the 40-45 miles to the red snapper banks or even a bit farther to the Gulf Stream, and to have it always docked in the water, but it's just impractical to me to spend the money a 25+ foot deep v hull boat with a couple big Honda or Yammies out back costs, when I might use it a handful of times a year for the long excursions.

If I was going to do it all over again, I'd buy a smaller skiff--just big enough for shrimping and sea trout and on a nice day, out in the bays. if I took the seats out of my big skiff now--it could actually fit that Ford F350 in it (and still float) and it's just too much, unless I was a commercial shrimper/crabber, which are dying trades.

I guess I've been pretty lucky in some respects with the dames, because I have never seen anything as money sucking as a boat......

That why they say the two happiest days in a boater's life are the day he buys a boat and the day he sells it....

[jm21-2]

The best northwest boating joke I have heard is this one:

If you are thinking of buying a boat in the Northwest, do the following:
1. Pull a bunch of hundreds out of your bank account.
2. Fill up your bath tub with buckets of ice until you have an ice water bath.
3. Make sure the toilet lid is open.
4. Strip and climb in the tub.
5. Start throwing the $100 bills into the toilet.
6. When you are out of bills, flush the toilet.

If you enjoyed that, then you may also enjoy owning a boat in the Northwest.


Of course, that being said, the area around the Puget Sound and San Juans has the highest boat ownership per capita in the world.

I am thinking a cheap powerboat with a cuddy cabin and free moorage may fit my needs better as I will probably be taking just weekend trips when there is good weather with my fiance. Paying $2,400 per year moorage on a boat that is probably worth $4,500 is not as appealing as it once was, aside from repairs. I got such a good deal on it it's hard to complain too much though.

[jm21-2]

Flight to Taiwan is booked. Leave 11/26 and get back on 12/7. Tickets for a decent flight ended up being about $1070 (1 short stop in Japan, decent departure time).

Now to plan where to go. she's convinced Taiwan is boring and doesn't realize how interesting it is to me.

EDIT:
I think I will really be loving this Nook I got on the trip....usually I take 2-3 novels for the flights and they take up a lot of space in my carry-on.