now the sh*t starts

[piglett]

now the sh*t starts

well i wondered how long it would be & it sure wasn't long at all.
Marilys sister is past due on her 1/2 of the rent & now she exspects me to pay her share ....hey thanks for that sister : )
So now i get to send over p15000 by the end of the month ....Oh joy
the only up side is now Marily is starting to see what i was talking about when I said "they think i am rich"


piglett

[Heruamen]

  Does Marily expect you to pay or does her sister expect you to pay,  How does Marily feel about that? How do you feel about that.  Do you feel warning bells or is it something you are coo with.

[Gato4Astrid]

Piglett

I do not know about Philippines, but I have checked the exchange rate  15,000 PHP = £220 GBP / $330 / $620,000 COP

That's about 1 month wage in Colombia doing adminstration work!!! 

[z_k_g]

Piggy,

You actually see an upside?

Over $330 USD for HALF the rent!!

I think Heruamen was paying close to that for an entire house in an exclusive neighborhood in CDO!

This is a test as far as I see it, one that you probably should fail in terms of paying.  You need to really understand Marily's position clearly on this also.

Zulu

[thekfc]

15,000 for half, so that is 30,000 pesos for a month - that is expensive, even for Manila. That would be the price for a 2 bedroom all inclusive in a good neighborhood in Manila - swimming pool, A/C, cable, etc.

In Metro Manila (especially Makati - Financial District & Pasay - Airport/business/restaurant/shopping/entertainment), an apartment would be about the same price (if not more expensive) as a house. It is about location & convenience.

[Heruamen]

   I paid 25000php  (500 American dollars per month ) for a house in one of the most exclusive neighborhoods (Xavier Estates) with guarded gates, beautiful huge country club .   I did not want to leave there.  At the exchange rate was 48pesos to the dollar.  NOw its 45pesos and the past 3 months it went down to 43 pesos.  That didn't make me very happy when it came to sending money there.  Cause then I had to pay a little more plus the western union fees . Now i use xoom cause they only charge 5 dollars to send money.   By the way KFC your fiance is beautiful you lucky dog hehehheeheeh

[z_k_g]

Piggy,

A few questions.

Is this a budget shortfall because of some emergency?  If her share is P15000 then why is she short the entire amount?  Does she have P5000 or P3000 or at least something to pay on her own rent?

Is she simply over extended and her apt is too expensive for her budget?

P15000 is expensive for the PI, is this the first time she has had a shortfall?

Maybe these questions make too much sense and are irrelevant because she just wants the rich Kano to pay her rent!

But if she is really in need of assistance then I would suggest that she move and find a place that's within her budget.  She can't afford this place.


Zulu

[thekfc]

 By the way KFC your fiance is beautiful you lucky dog hehehheeheeh

Thanks Heruamen

[Celtic_Jorge]

My burd's mother is disabled and her grandmother is retired and they're expecting me to send money over every month for their rent and food...  Right now she's the only one who works in her family, and when she comes to the USA, she can't work for a long time (I have heard conflicting stories on exactly how long it takes before she can actually get a green card..)

I guess this is the way it goes.. We're the man, we have the job, so they just expect us to help their family.

[fathertime]

They survived before you came along.  Hopefully your wife is not encouraging/insisting you make this payment.  The harder thing to do is say NO, and that is exactly what needs to be done as a strong precedent.  You have your own responsibilities and appear to be on a relatively tight budget, they will have to respect your boundaries IF you make it clear that these boundaries exist.  IF not, then prepare to break out the wallet fairly regularly for things you should not be paying.     

Fathertime!

[Gato4Astrid]

Celtic Jorge

I disagree with your posting.......  There are millions of Philipines/Colombians/ Martians are surviving everyday and they all do not have the help of foreigners services!!

[Gato4Astrid]

They survived before you came along.  Hopefully your wife is not encouraging/insisting you make this payment.  The harder thing to do is say NO, and that is exactly what needs to be done as a strong precedent.  You have your own responsibilities and appear to be on a relatively tight budget, they will have to respect your boundaries IF you make it clear that these boundaries exist.  IF not, then prepare to break out the wallet fairly regularly for things you should not be paying.     

Fathertime!

Well Said!

[Alabamaboy!]

I don't think a little cash is a bad thing. Even if it is a recurring expense. I send my mom a couple hundred dollars a month because she needs it. So if it is needed with my wife's family, and we can do it without causing problems in our own life, I don't see a problem. The problem is the amount. I think $200 would be about the limit for me. And with that, only if they were appreciative.

I sent about that much to my ex wife's family in Pangansinan and they were able to put her sisters through University to get degrees as a nurse and pharmacist. And were able to expand their house, many other things.

[Alabamaboy!]

I do think it is bad if they ask for it though.

I think of doing these things on my own because I think it is a pure form of charity without any religious middlemen. And I do it all the time with my workers, family, etc. Nothing wrong with giving a helping hand if you are able to do so. But just don't get taken for a ride.

[Celtic_Jorge]

Celtic Jorge

I disagree with your posting.......  There are millions of Philipines/Colombians/ Martians are surviving everyday and they all do not have the help of foreigners services!!

Depends on the circumstances.  My burd's mum and grandmum literally can't work....  And there's no one else in the family who can support them after she's gone.. I kind of feel for them. 

[thekfc]

My burd's mother is disabled and her grandmother is retired and they're expecting me to send money over every month for their rent and food...  Right now she's the only one who works in her family, and when she comes to the USA, she can't work for a long time (I have heard conflicting stories on exactly how long it takes before she can actually get a green card..)

I guess this is the way it goes.. We're the man, we have the job, so they just expect us to help their family.

CJ, let me get this right.

You just recently started chatting with this woman.
You have never meet her or visited her.
The two of you have not spent a second together.
You have not seen what her situation is in person, you are only relying on what she tells you.

And they are EXPECTING you to send them money for rent & food every month. Not requesting or would like you to or it would be wonderful if you send money..... but expecting you?

And are you going send any money? Without first taking a trip & meeting this woman in person.
 
CJ, I am rooting for you & want to see you get a good wife and have a happy family but first you need to sit down & drink a few Guinness Stout. You will think more clearly when you are drunk.

[Gato4Astrid]

CJ

In addition to The-KFC's posting, they could be RANGERS supporters   

If in the case, what KFC has written about you, please do not send any money until at least after you have met her, or get to know her better.

[Alabamaboy!]

Celtic_Jorge, look at all the people who donate money to churches or other "organized" charities. Then you find out later they are only getting a fraction of the money and the rest goes to management or worse yet to finance the kiddie porn/gay love situation that has happened so frequently in the religious organizations.

At least when it is inside your own family you should be able to keep close tags on what it is being used for.

But the amount that was being tossed around earlier, seemed to be excessive for the Philippines.

If you can afford it, why not help out people who will greatly benefit from it? But again, that being said, only if they truly appreciate it.

*** Just read the post from kfc below. If this girl is not at the minimum your fiancee, then hellsssss no, don't give her anything. Unless you are only doing it as a complete "charity" case and you have money to burn. But just think, if you actually do someday marry a Filipina, that money that you are spending now could be used to truly help out your own extended family with your wife. If you blow it on this girl and she is really a scammer and doing the same thing with others, the cash is gone and cannot be used later with people who are actually part of your family.

At the very minimum if you are helping with cash to that degree without being at least engaged, you are setting up bad precedent. And they will be milking you for a long time to come and you will have a realllllly hard time trying to discover if she is interested in you or your wallet.

[Ray]

But if she is really in need of assistance then I would suggest that she move and find a place that's within her budget.  She can't afford this place.

This is excellent advice so pay attention Piggy Bank!

If that is really what she is paying for rent, then she can’t afford it and she can’t afford to support her sister either.

Put your wife on a monthly budget until she is on the plane. $300-400 per month or something close to that should suffice.

She will need to start by getting all of her documents in order and applying for her passport and doing her CFO class.

Tell her to rent a room where she can stretch her allowance, and tell her sister to go pound sand. You didn’t marry her sister, so she can go find her own husband to support her ass. Is this the same sister who completely dropped the ball on the advance marriage prep with the church?

Ray

[Celtic_Jorge]

Alright just to clarify I'm not sending her any money now.. Except for a small amount for her phone.  I am getting my plane ticket early next month and going over there to Thailand.. There I think we'll decide if or not we want to get engaged on a more serious and formal level.  So yeh, no money is being sent right now.. She just basically told me that she can't move to the USA unless money gets sent over every month to her family because her family is dependent on her due to the above described circumstances (too old, heart trouble, disabled).  She doesn't want money sent now, but when she actually arrives here to live with me.

On the Rangers note.. ha ha.  I'd be really surprised if there were any Thai huns...  There is, however, a Hong Kong Rangers FC, named after the huns in Glasgow.  Some real Rangers players (and funny enough, some former Celts) have gone over there to play towards the end of their careers.. It was founded by a Scottish guy too.. Too funny.

I have a mate though who has seen some Scottish huns around Pattaya, though...     Probably there for some boom boom like most farang...   

[piglett]

  Does Marily expect you to pay or does her sister expect you to pay,  How does Marily feel about that? How do you feel about that.  Do you feel warning bells or is it something you are coo with.

Marily is very upset with her sister over this.
this is not the 1st time her sister has pulled this cr@p so i should have seen it coming i guess. So Marily will bunk with her cousin Alma for a while but the past due rent will have to be paid ( her cousin lives in the same building) I guess the up side is that Marily will be able to live very cheaply because Alma only wants p2000 a month.


piglett 
 

[piglett]

Piggy,

You actually see an upside?

Over $330 USD for HALF the rent!!

I think Heruamen was paying close to that for an entire house in an exclusive neighborhood in CDO!

This is a test as far as I see it, one that you probably should fail in terms of paying.  You need to really understand Marily's position clearly on this also.

Zulu

The rent for the Marily's apartment is p7000 a month
Marilys 1/2 is been paid in full .I know this because I met her landlord while there & i saw the paper that he had signed each month when she paid her part of the rent.
the problem is that Marily's sister is only in Manila once in a while the rest of the time she is in the province studding for the bar exam that she will take in Sept.
I have now texted her sister twice & each time she fails to respond.
so I guess i get to be the guy holding the bag.


piglett

[piglett]

This is excellent advice so pay attention Piggy Bank!

Oh i am hearing everyone loud & clear.

If that is really what she is paying for rent, then she can’t afford it and she can’t afford to support her sister either.

she can & has been paying her 1/2 of the rent for months with no problem but she can't come up with her sisters share which is about 4 months past due. 

Put your wife on a monthly budget until she is on the plane. $300-400 per month or something close to that should suffice.

she makes enough for her to live off of as a nurse.

She will need to start by getting all of her documents in order and applying for her passport and doing her CFO class.

Ok what is a "CFO class?" she should have all the documents from the province by the end of this week.

You didn’t marry her sister, so she can go find her own husband to support her ass. Is this the same sister who completely dropped the ball on the advance marriage prep with the church?
Ray

OOOOOH YES this IS the same sister that "helped" with the wedding.


piglett

[thekfc]

In addition to The-KFC's posting, they could be RANGERS supporters  

CHELSEA FC supporter here.  

[Bob_S]

Depends on the circumstances.

I agree.  Every situation is different.  My mother-in-law is a retired professional in a first world industrialized nation, so she has a comfortable pension to keep her in mochi and fish heads to her heart's content.  But if you're in a third world nation with no real social safety net, able-bodied children are your retirement plan.  If you are taking their one source of income, it is only fair that you find or provide an alternate source.  It doesn't mean you need to provide them in the lab of luxury, but if you can keep them in the same standard of living with no real dip in yours and still be able to provide for your new family, that works out great.  Do it if you can.

OOOOOH YES this IS the same sister that "helped" with the wedding.

It sounds like this sister is going to be trouble.  Your new bride seems sharp enough to realize this.  Lots of us have or have had in-law trouble.  But if you picked a good woman, she'll have your back and try to protect you from their drama.  By moving in with her cousin rather than trying to placate her sister, it looks like your wife is doing just that.  This is a very good sign.  It all may seem like a big hassle for you now, but later, looking back, you'll see that this was a test that proved very important to your marriage.