Is it difficult to get my Fiance & 3 children to the USA?

[michaelb]

And maybe she IS A PROSTITUTE, I do not know, after all I am thousands of miles away.

I'm sure I don't know either, and maybe it doesn't matter to you....but consider this, if the consulate officer giving the interview thinks she is, she won't get the visa.

[fathertime]

Greetings HOM,
You don't appear naive or like a deer in the headlights...so I say do what you want...you know what you might be getting into... take your chances....the worst likely result is you are out a maybe 10k or so and your feelings are a little hurt....i'm guessing a full grown man can hack that (well at least most)....maybe the lady isn't as bad as everybody here is assuming...just in case she is scamming you, i would continue to refrain from sending money...any chance you will go back and visit her a second time prior to any visa committments?

happy trails,

Fathertime!

[Bear]

Please don't think I'm ganging up on you cause it really isn't like that.  The guys who post here do so because we learned the potential problems (someone of us the hard way) and use our spare time to help others avoid them.  Of all the guys here, I've helped so many after they had some user or unforeseen situation rips them apart in a prejudicial manner without any mercy and some even taking them for every penny they could get.  People in other countries don't grow up with the same attitudes we have towards being helpful and giving, they grow up with extreme hardships and they think we are fools because we surrender to their lies so easily.  I've seen the sweetest thing you ever had a wet dream about distroy and man 3x her size and show disgust while doing it.

Please don't do this or your next.  And if you do please don't try to be my friend cause I'm tired of seeing men cry.

BTW, there aren't any MOBs around here or anywhere else in this freaking world!!!

The Bear Family

[piglett]

Why say that?
“THREE Children 3 fathers…”
“The Fathers… The only time they contact her to give her money is in the hopes of having sex…”
“…the only time he comes to see her is not that much and he just wants sex and brings her a little money for the child.
“She refuses to have any sort of relationship with him including sex (or so she says!) but I trust her.”
“She says that the Fathers (2 different) do NOT support the children in any way.”
“She is unemployed, she does massage but no sex”
 â€œI know she wants out of her situation”
And finally:  “…yes I may be naïve…”
You said it, so I was only confirming your suspicions.
Wake up man!
Ray

Ray you & i mite see things differently at times but not this time
your rite on the money!!!!


Hotoil ...... you really need to take a step back & think man

I'm not trying 2 bust ur chops here but wow there are red flags all over the place 

I think your biting off way more than you can chew.


good luck
piglett

[bcc_1_2]

Let me put this in perspective for you asian lady seekers. This is like going to Pattaya and deciding to marry a bargirl or street walker.

You can take the whore out of the whorehouse... but you can't take the whore out of the girl. You can take the girl out of the bar... but not the bar girl out of the girl.

These girls act soft and desperate, but they are hard to the core and they know exactly what they are doing (you just don't find that out til later).

hotoilmassage (imagine with that screen name me thinking you might be a monger) is going to do whatever he wants... but NEWBIE beware.... it never works out. Speaking of Thailand... Stickman has posted people's stories about such situations like this. I believe the worst thing that can happen is being stabbed repeatedly. Putas be crazy.

A gringo has options in Central America. My advice is to use them. Find a hot single chica with no kids. Educated and being middle class help too.

Leaving this woman is not a hard decision. In fact it is simple and easy. Do not visit her again. Block her email, number, etc. The end. In time you'll get over it and be ready to get back in the game.

You aren't a white knight. You aren't rescuing this girl. You think you are? What if she wasn't smoking hot. Would you marry her then?

Seriously, if you are thinking about dating a "professional" at least go talk to (or chat up online) a guy or two who is into that scene. Because rule number one is never date them.

Everyone thinks they are different, there relationship is different, this hooker is special. No you/they aren't. If you even get the hint she's a hooker... RUN.

[utopiacowboy]

What is with this strange compulsion of gringos to rescue poor Third World women? Is that a basis for a relationship?

[hotoilmassage]

TO: fathertime

thank you and appreciate the kind words.
Life is FULL of chances.
My feelings are not so hurt easily
I do not think she is bad at all, she has had 3 men all knock her up, neglect to see or support their child which to me is a very evil thing ot do.
She is very unhappy and meets men all the time with her work.
then she meets me whom (all modesty aside  hehehe ) think that she is sweet and all of a sudden this board thinks I am naive' and an idiot.
maybe I am, but you know, only time will tell.
i have told her upfront that i will NOT be sending her money each month, I have heard a lot of sob stories before.
She wil have to make the choice of marrying me and living here, which she wants, and hopefully wil happen soon.
Most of all she is indeed genuine (not an actress) she asks for nothing from me and is happy when I come down there.
And... if she is scamming me, my fault
I am actually going there at the end of the month for a week, nice way to start the New Years eh?

to BEAR

I am a photographer and APPRECIATE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM and would have not posted this here if I could not take the heat.
And THANK YOU ALL for caring enough to add your two cents worth.
I MEAN THAT!
And I have learned the hard way, I am a single father who adores his child and my "ex" (never married) is a "PREDATORY FEMALE" (read that book)
who keeps my child from me to make her the better person.In reality my child loves and misses me, but when she sees me on weekends, it is nice!

And yes I think our attitude is different her in the states.
I have been homeless and use to make thousands in the 80's I had a little problem with the white powdery stuff, but I praise God every day
that since 1986 I have not been like Richard Pryor and snorted peru. LOL!
But seriously doing soul searching, I am truly blessed to have my kind of life.
When I get sad, I think SOMEONE ELSE OUT THERE HAS IT WORSE THAN ME.

I spent 2 weeks in Peru this summer and drove all around and I will never complain about waiting inn line here for coffee again.
Those people a lot of them have it so bad there but they do not complain, I spent 2 weeks and had NO PROBLEMS at all.
And It makes me happy to have what I have, except for a significant other.
Of course.
Well women all over are designed to destroy dreams READ THE PREDATORY FEMALE and you will understand this better.
And I will not cry to you, ever, I promise.
thanks BEAR!

 
TO piglett:
I hope you are wrong, biting off more than I can chew.


TO: bcc_1_2

I am not an asian lady seeker, nor did I go to CR to find romance, IT FOUND ME!
Whore or not, she is forgiven and people can change, if not then I made a mistake.
I am an ex new yorker and spent my life there so I am not that naive'.
well as far as my moniker it is what it is.
You say it never works out, has it worked out for you?
It worked for my parents 44 years before mum passed.
So things CAN work, not everyone is a money grubbing whore.
BTW I can find dozens of ladies if I want, but this is the one I want and if she has "baggage" that is the way it is.

leaving her is like defeat.
Failure is not an option.
It is like working out, you can sit in a chair complain and get fat or you can work out and enjoy the pain leaving the body.
I am not going to sit back and let complacency take over.
You are correct LEAVING IS ALWAYS EASY it is the COWARDS way out, IMHO.

And with all due respect, who are you to tell me how to live my life?
Not email her, block her phone, etc?
Is that how you handle your romance?
Pretty pathetic I must say.
I handle things in person MANO A MANO or Man to lady.
As far as getting over it, nothing is over.
We have a week planned together and we will enjoy it.
Never said I was Superman or a White Knight, just an average Joe from USA that has a blessed life and wants to share it with one I love and one that loves me.
Listen, she has asked me for NOTHING!
Not a penny! Not a promise, nothing.

And yes if she got hit by a car and was disfigured, i would love her no matter what.
I think your idea and mine on love are different.
yours is superficial and vain and mine is deep and pasionate.
I take the good with the bad, and can deal with if whe weighed 300 pounds, (she does not), but how can you say you really love someone if you only look as the
outside?

I am not into dating anyone, a pro a hooker or any of that, this is my FIANCE' and it is what it is.

And no I am not running anywhere.
but thanks for your advice.

To: utopiacowboy

"What is with this strange compulsion of gringos to rescue poor Third World women? Is that a basis for a relationship? "

 Well I went to 26 different countries so far on business and this is the only girl I have met that I would like to be with.
Maybe in Colombia I can get a MOB but not interested.
So sorry to deflate you but I am sorry that you think I am trying to "rescue" anyone.
Yes I am trying to take her away from a life that is uncertain and people like her old boyfriends that only want to see their children and get sex from mom.
So if that is trying to "rescue" a Third World woman, I guess you are correct.
BTW I think Costa Rica ROCKS it has a far better health care system than Colombia.
Not to insult your country, it is BEAUTIFUL I have been there, but Costa Rica is by far a superior "Third World" country than a country like Colombia.
Maybe I buy you a drink in Cali sometime just to shouw you I am not a bad dude!


BTW to all!
THIS IS THE BEST FUN AND ADVICE I HAVE HAD ALL YEAR THANKS!
I owe you all a Guinness
Slainte'

[jm21-2]

You are correct LEAVING IS ALWAYS EASY it is the COWARDS way out, IMHO.

Knowing when to walk away from a bad thing is a very important trait.

leaving her is like defeat.
Failure is not an option.

And that is the fool's way in...to a lot of trouble.


For almost everything, I can easily walk away. I was able to avoid countless bad deals and thus preserve the resources to take advantage of the good ones. But when it comes to women I have historically adopted the fool's attitude that leaving her is a defeat and tried to make things work. It never did. Just caused unnecessary pain. I am still working on breaking that retarded habit. I urge you to do the same.

[bcc_1_2]

Whore or not, she is forgiven and people can change, if not then I made a mistake.

I'm not going to post it on the message board. But if you PM me with interest I'll send you a link of a monger board so you can ask them about the putas in Costa Rica (or you could just google Costa Rica Tica monger forum).

I'm not surprised she found you. Look hookers ALL play the game. They all know the game. You have no idea what this "game" even is. If you want to know I'll send you to a place where you can find out. If not... enjoy the ride.

It is not uncommon for Ticos not to pay child support. Yet she let 3 different guys "knock her up".

[Ray]

Hey hotoil,

We’re not trying to bust your balls. We’re only trying to help you.

I know that you will do what you will regardless of what we say, so at least take your time and don’t rush this, OK?

Give it another year…you’re still young…and then if you are still set on going through with this, I’ll do whatever I can to help you with the visa stuff, OK?

I understand how you feel, but I hate to see a fellow traveler get hurt. Be careful!
Ray

[william3rd]

TO bcc_1_2

She is not either Puta or monger just a desperate woman trying to get out of a desperate situation.
She does NOT work in a high class hotel.
And maybe she IS A PROSTITUTE, I do not know, after all I am thousands of miles away.
however, we were both tested and came up Negative and she practices safe sex.
I know massage i sdifferent in CR and I do trust you, I know the difference.
Well I am not going to be sending her money each month not this person.
I am sure she could get other men, she is very beautiful.
Hail mary like Doug Flutie? LOL!

Oh my pride is out there for all to see and I agree with you and maybe I will add my sob story but maybe I will add a SUCCESSFUL and loving marriage.
if not, there are plenty of fish out there, and the ocean is always open.
Actually I AM THE ONE who gives HOT oil massages to athletes she gives theraputic (yeah right!) massage.
I am sure she can cry on demand but so far she has been either the best actress not to get an Oscar or a genuinly good person stuck in a rut.
I have done a lot of research and this board is helping me some, and I appreciate all the people that are not thinking I am doing the right thing, it motivates me into
checking into all aspects of this.

I googled and WIKIPEDIA the K1 but wanted ot see if anyone had experience in 3 children, that is all.
I think I walked into a mess...
Thanks

The children will not be the main issue. If yo u have the income, then the children follow. The issues are the potential permission from the fathers or a CR court order or mom's occupation. Prostitution , while "legal" in CR, warrents a bar on the issuance of a US visa. 

I have a a couple of clients with 3 step children over the years. The number of children involved in visas decline dramatically as their numbers go up. Three has been the absolute top.

[hotoilmassage]

to: jm21-2

I totally agree with you about knowing when to walk away, but that time has not come yet.
I am no fool nor int trouble, I will know when.
You dispense good advice!
Thanks

to bcc_1_2:

If you send me the link I will check it out thanks.
Well we sort of found each other by accident.
I know about hookers we have them here in the USA as well.
It is also not uncommon for deadbeat dads here in the USA NOT to pay support, but it disturbs me, it shows lack of love on the Fathers part.


to: Ray
Bust my balls, I need it. This is more theraputic than paying some schmuck $90 an hour and you are all nice or else you would be doing other things, right?
Maybe a year is a good idea but she in the meantime is suffering a great deal.
She has her sister watch her kids as her apartment is small and my house is big.
She has little, I have a lot, the list is endless.

TO bcc_1_2
Right now the children are a stumbling block if you will, and I mean that in a positive way.
I have no desire to take here hee without her children, I am a Father and that is not even a consideration.
They will come if we can get the paperwork done.
You say permission from the father from a CR court?
Does that really apply when they have NO CUSTODY of the kids?
They do not even see their kids, one does but maybe every 3 months.
One man wants to have a threesome with the mother and another lady and give her $50 and see here kids, is that normal?
I do not think so, well, being a sick pup, a threesome is every mans fantasy, been there done that.
But I am a changed man now, I devote my life to the Lord and she does also, maybe we are not perfect, but having sex with your ex to give money to the kids???
That is not good and I think it is pathetic.

My former self might have knocked his teeth out but God will take care of it not me.
My irish temper is in the past thank God.
Well... if I do HAVE to get permission from the fathers, that WILL be difficult.
Do I drag them into court and prove that they are unemployed, alcoholics, deadbeats?
This is a tough one for me.

[Capstone]

hotoilmassage,

I am not going to give you any advice about what you should or should not do because I think that enough has already been said by the other guys on the board that should give you something to think about. What I will give you though is a little visa information that you should consider before proceeding with the process.

1. Visa approval in not automatic - many guys get engaged or married to foreign women and their visas do not get approved.

2. As part of the visa process background/name checks are conducted on both the petitioner and beneficiary and if anything is found which has not already been disclosed in the visa paperwork then a denial is probably forthcoming.

3. On the visa application paperwork your fiancée will have to detail her job history for the past 10 years and irregardless of what you think, the fact that she has been giving massages in Costa Rica will raise a HUGE Red Flag with the visa/consulate official who handles your case.

4. Your fiancée will need to go through a visa interview with the consulate or embassy in Costa Rica in which they will ask her about her past. If the visa/consulate official has any suspicions that she may have ever engaged in prostitution then her visa will be denied.

5. The fact that your fiancée has 3 children with 3 different men will raise another huge red flag with the visa/consulate official who conducts your fiancee's interview. I am not saying that it is right or wrong for this to be a red flag but just stating a fact that it indeed will be. 

Speaking as someone who just recently went through the visa process myself I can tell you that you will have a very rough time and there is a very good chance that your fiancee's visa will not be approved. I am sorry to be so bleak but the visa/consulate officials who work these cases seek out anything that they can point to which merits a visa denial and your case will have many red flags for them to raise.

[william3rd]

most countries, including this one-and its 50 states- require that permission be given by the non custodial parent to allow for the move. An alternative is a court order allowing for the move away. It is not a matter of the non custodial parent being unfit or non supportive-although these factors may come into play.

We used to run into a request for "fees" for the permission signature in Russia and Ukraine.

[william3rd]

[quote author=Capstone link=topic=4913.msg56461#msg56461 date=1260369
1. Visa approval in not automatic - many guys get engaged or married to foreign women and their visas do not get approved. MOST DO, HOWEVER

2. As part of the visa process background/name checks are conducted on both the petitioner and beneficiary and if anything is found which has not already been disclosed in the visa paperwork then a denial is probably forthcoming.DELAY FOR INVESTIGATION IS LIKELY BUT DENIAL IF THE MISREPRESENTATION IS MATERIAL

3. On the visa application paperwork your fiancée will have to detail her job history for the past 10 years and irregardless of what you think, the fact that she has been giving massages in Costa Rica will raise a HUGE Red Flag with the visa/consulate official who handles your case. YUP

4. Your fiancée will need to go through a visa interview with the consulate or embassy in Costa Rica in which they will ask her about her past. If the visa/consulate official has any suspicions that she may have ever engaged in prostitution then her visa will be denied. TEN YEAR RESTRICTION

5. The fact that your fiancée has 3 children with 3 different men will raise another huge red flag with the visa/consulate official who conducts your fiancee's interview. I am not saying that it is right or wrong for this to be a red flag but just stating a fact that it indeed will be.  THIS ONE IS DEFINITELY PROBLEMATIC

[/quote]

You need to hire an attorney for this case. This is not a case you should do by yourself. The normal timeline will probably not apply to this case.

[michaelb]

Do I drag them into court and prove that they are unemployed, alcoholics, deadbeats?

Again, I don't know the law of CR, but I suspect that being alcoholic deadbeats doesn't matter (it doesn't in Colombia). I recommend (in this order)
1) No skin off your teeth, be a nice guy and sign the papers.
2) Don't you want your kid to have the opportunity of a better life?
3) OK, then, be that way, how much is your signature going to cost me?
4) That much?? H*ll, I can present the judge with your death certificate for less than half that.

Even after that, of course, there is still the little matter of getting her profession past the consulate.

[sean126]

You may want to pay close attention to Sir William....he's an attorney who does this everyday for a living.  Good luck to you and your endeavors.

You need to hire an attorney for this case. This is not a case you should do by yourself. The normal timeline will probably not apply to this case.

[hotoilmassage]

TO: Capstone

Thanks!
VISA INFORMATION IS WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR not lectures, (although I understand their concern)
Red flags will be raised indeed, but does not the fact that I love her and want to take her from that mean anything?
And... the more I am reading into this, she will most likely be denied.

So they judge her by her past mistakes with men?
That is rough but I guess a reality.

TO: william3rd

So the father has rights?
Even if they do not support the child?

TO: michaelb

in America deadbeat dads pay up, pay child support or go to jail.
Thanks and like everything eles in CR it seems, Money talks!

I LOvE THIS QUOTE
i HAVE READ THE ART OF WAR AND I RECOMMEND EVERYONE TO READ "THE PREDATORY FEMALE"


"All warfare is based on deception." --Sun Tzu

[jm21-2]

Just for the record, women are more likely than men to be delinquent on child support.

Past behavior is the best indicator of future behavior, especially in mature adults. That is why guys here are warning you. That is why they will do background checks and watch out for behavior like prostitution. Are there people who change? Sure...but the government has no reason to take that (very bad) gamble, and I would advise any guy not to take the gamble either. There are too many good women out there.

[william3rd]

TO: Capstone

So they judge her by her past mistakes with men? NO- THEY ARE JUDGING AS TO WHETHER OR NOT SHE IS LIKELY TO BE A FINE UPSTANDING LAWFUL PERMANENT RESIDENT OF THE US. THE SOVEREIGN HAS AN ABSOLUTE RIGHT TO DETERMINE WHICH ALIENS ARE ALLOWED TO ENTER THE COUNTRY AND UNDER WHAT TERMS THEY ARE ALLOWED TO REMAIN

TO: william3rd

So the father has rights? THE FATHER ALWAYS HAS RIGHTS UNTIL THEY ARE TAKEN AWAY BY JUDICIAL MANDATE.
Even if they do not support the child? THIS IS ONE OF SEVERAL FACTORS THAT MAY BE GERMANE TO THE DECISION MAKING.

ONE THING YOU SAID EARLIER STANDS OUT-

YOU will be dragging nobody into court. YOU do not have standing in their Court system. SHE and hopefully an attorney that you will hire for her will be dragging the 3 guys into court- one at a time-much to the chortles and merriment of the judicial employees.

in America deadbeat dads pay up, pay child support or go to jail.
ALOT DONT- I GET CCW cases here where Dad doesnt give a rat's ass. Only when the Driver's License disappear does Dad offer to pay something. Only the most extreme cases ever go to jail.

[piglett]

Let me put this in perspective for you asian lady seekers. This is like going to Pattaya and deciding to marry a bargirl or street walker.
You can take the whore out of the whorehouse... but you can't take the whore out of the girl. You can take the girl out of the bar... but not the bar girl out of the girl.
These girls act soft and desperate, but they are hard to the core and they know exactly what they are doing (you just don't find that out til later).
hotoilmassage (imagine with that screen name me thinking you might be a monger) is going to do whatever he wants... but NEWBIE beware.... it never works out. Speaking of Thailand... Stickman has posted people's stories about such situations like this. I believe the worst thing that can happen is being stabbed repeatedly. Putas be crazy.
A gringo has options in Central America. My advice is to use them. Find a hot single chica with no kids. Educated and being middle class help too.
Leaving this woman is not a hard decision. In fact it is simple and easy. Do not visit her again. Block her email, number, etc. The end. In time you'll get over it and be ready to get back in the game.
You aren't a white knight. You aren't rescuing this girl. You think you are? What if she wasn't smoking hot. Would you marry her then?
Seriously, if you are thinking about dating a "professional" at least go talk to (or chat up online) a guy or two who is into that scene. Because rule number one is never date them.
Everyone thinks they are different, there relationship is different, this hooker is special. No you/they aren't. If you even get the hint she's a hooker... RUN.

All very good points Bcc , but not so sure this guy will listen no matter what.
he will probably end up getting screwed 1 way or another by this chick.
& i don't mean in the way he would like either   
Oh well let him go get his teeth kicked in if that's what he really wants.
the rest of us already know that's how it's going 2 go down anyhow.
doesn't it always go down that way ??


piglett

[jm21-2]

Don't forget about the affidavit of support. I recently had a divorce case where the husband ended up paying out the wazoo to get the wife to waive her contractual rights under the affidavit of support. I don't even want to think about a woman with three dependent children and no job prospects...hoo boy...

They don't like sending those who don't pay child support to jail because all it usually does is cost the system money to have them in jail and the non-payer loses his/her job which decreases his/her ability to pay and increases his/her likelihood of using welfare programs. Oh and they can get a public defender if jail time is sought which is another expense. Not the best remedy.

[hotoilmassage]

TO: william3rd
That is what I am wondering about, their court system.
Does the mother have any rights regarding her children that the men do not take care of?
A lot of folks seemed bemused about all of this me trying to find answers.
My heart is pure and I am only trying to find answers about this so we can help each other.
And so what if the deadbeats get dragged in one at a time, they deserve t for not seeing their kids.


TO: piglett
I do listen and am glad your life is perfect as you seem to enjoy judging others.
If I get screwed, that is my fault, but that has not happened yet, my glass is stil half full.
And your negativity amazes me, I find it sad you like to wish ill will to others in love.
Glad you can forsee the future, how are my stocks going to do?
hehehe
You seem like the most negative person I have read in a long time, nice ot know that there are people out there that wish others bad.
Nice to know that because I am nt one of them.

TO: jm21-2

"Don't forget about the affidavit of support."
What is that all about?
She was never married does that apply here?

[michaelb]

Affidavit of support is a document that you have to file with the US government stating that you will support her once she is in the United States. It has nothing to do with the other men in her life, whether she was ever married to them or had children by them. Been so long that I can't remember if you file it before they issue the K-1 visa or after you marry her, during the adjustment of status process. I think (but can't remember for sure) that it has to include that you will support all children that you bring in with her......I'm sure Ray or William could tell you both who is included and when you have to file it right off the top of their heads without even looking it up. You really should to out la migra's website, they explain all of this stuff in great detail. Another good place to look is a website called visa-journey, it's full of people sharing their experiences (good and bad) and advice dealing with getting spouses and children here.

[william3rd]

TO: william3rd
That is what I am wondering about, their court system.
Does the mother have any rights regarding her children that the men do not take care of?
A lot of folks seemed bemused about all of this me trying to find answers.
My heart is pure and I am only trying to find answers about this so we can help each other.
And so what if the deadbeats get dragged in one at a time, they deserve t for not seeing their kids.

GIVE HER THE MONEY TO CONSULT WITH AN ATTORNEY INVOLVED WITH THIS ISSUE IN HER COUNTRY. DO NOT SPEND ANY MORE TIME SEEKING ANSWERS IN THE UNITED STATES. YOUR ANSWER MAY EVEN VARY BY THE JUDGE DOWN THERE.

THE MARCHING AND CHOWDER SOCIETY DOES NOT HAVE THE ANSWER YOU SEEK.

IF THEY ARE SEEING THEIR CHILDREN, THEN YOUR LIKELIHOOD OF SUCCESS IS REDUCED AS IS THE LIKELIHOOD OF THEM NOT SUPPORTING THEIR CHILDREN.
TO: jm21-2

"Don't forget about the affidavit of support."
What is that all about?
She was never married does that apply here?

THE I134 AFFIDAVIT OF SUPPORT IS FILED BY YOU TO ASSURE THE GOVERNMENT THAT YOU CAN SUPPORT THESE FOLKS IF YOU ARE PERMITTED TO BRING THEM TO THE US. THE I864 IS FILED AFTER A MARRIAGE OCCURS  .  THE I864 IS A BINDING 10 YEAR SUPPORT OBLIGATION THAT ENDS AFTER CERTAIN CONDITIONS OCCUR OR TEN YEARS.

MY ADVICE TO YOU FWIW IS THAT YOU DO NOT BRING HER AT THIS TIME. I WOULD SUGGEST THAT YOU GO DOWN AND VISIT SOME MORE.  IF IT WERE ME, I WOULD NOT BRING HER AT ALL. THE WHITE KNIGHT SYNDROME IS A SERIOUS ISSUE HERE. I BELEIVE YOU CAN FIND EQUALLY AS ATTRACTIVE WOMEN WITHOUT THE BAGGAGE.

FOR OVER 15 YEARS I HAVE CAUTIONED READERS - YOU CAN TAKE THE GIRL OUT OF THE BAR BUT YOU CAN'T TAKE THE BAR OUT OF THE GIRL-voice of experience here, pilgrim- OR OUT OF THE MASSAGE PARLOR.

THIS IS MY LAST WORD OF ADVICE TO YOU. IF YOUR SITUATION IS REAL, THEN GOOD LUCK TO YOU.