Single Father No More........ "Please Read"

[raycjs]

To All:

I decide after a long conversation with SFNM (Jeff) to make an appeal to all the members on this board to help any way they can.. SFNM has a full time job in Peru
working as a School teacher he will be working 8 hours a day 7 days a week from now until December . Then he will cut back to 6 days a week He moved to Peru to better his life and his children he is behind the eight ball finically until November. That is when he will start to receive is pay checks and his paperwork is all finished with Canada social services so he now can continue receiving his children's benefits from the death of his wife.The first check will arrive in November and every month there after. He needs some money to get him though the next 30 days. After the 6th of November he will be fine and will not need any help. I would like to know how you guy's and or Gal's feel about sending money to one person and then that person can forward the money at one time to SFNM.... I have no problem receiving the money on his behalf if you want i have a PAYPAL account i can use for this. I am also open to any other ideas. If you can help Thank you in advance.... IF you can not help I still say Thank You i know right now times are hard for many so what ever you can do i say thank you....


Please all feed back is welcome.....

Thanks
Ray

[Dan]

To All:

I decide after a long conversation with SFNM (Jeff) to make an appeal to all the members on this board to help any way they can.. SFNM has a full time job in Peru
working as a School teacher he will be working 8 hours a day 7 days a week from now until December . Then he will cut back to 6 days a week He moved to Peru to better his life and his children he is behind the eight ball finically until November. That is when he will start to receive is pay checks and his paperwork is all finished with Canada social services so he now can continue receiving his children's benefits from the death of his wife.The first check will arrive in November and every month there after. He needs some money to get him though the next 30 days. After the 6th of November he will be fine and will not need any help. I would like to know how you guy's and or Gal's feel about sending money to one person and then that person can forward the money at one time to SFNM.... I have no problem receiving the money on his behalf if you want i have a PAYPAL account i can use for this. I am also open to any other ideas. If you can help Thank you in advance.... IF you can not help I still say Thank You i know right now times are hard for many so what ever you can do i say thank you....


Please all feed back is welcome.....

Thanks
Ray

Ray,

Does SFNM have a PayPal account? One that he can access in Peru?

Assuming so, we can do a couple of things. PL can, if you (and SFNM) want, set up a PayPal Donate button that will either gather up funds for passing along to him via PayPal, or that is directly tied to his PayPal account - either way.

In any case, PL is 'in' for $50. Just let me/us know how you want to receive funds (PayPal preferred).

- Dan

[obyjuan]

I am in..I will give you a call, Ray.  Toby

[Swisskid]

Please let me know the PayPal account link so I can donate $ before I leave for Manila next week.

[Researcher]

        Ray,
             You can count me in.Just PM me if you want to let me know what you guys have come up with.

       Researcher

[raycjs]

To All:

Thank you all for the feed back... Here is what i would like to do, i am going to send SFNM (Jeff) $ 1,000.00 this will get him though the next 6 weeks with Oct and Nov rent and money for misc. I would like anyone who wants to go to paypal and use my email address ray@centraljerseyservices.com to send me what every you feel you can afford i will repay my self up to $ 800.00 anything over that i will forward to SFNM (Jeff) anything less it is on me. He needs help now so this is why i will send it and this will be open for 30 days if anyone wants to help. He does not have a paypal account so i will send it to him via moneygram.

I want to let everyone know that what every you send will be kept in private and only SFNM (Jeff) and i will know so please do not feel like you have to match someone else or feel if you can only give $5.00 every dollar counts.

I want to Thank You all on behalf of SFNM (Jeff) and his family.

Thank you again

Ray

[Bear]

How does the cost of living there comepare to where he is from in Canada?

The Bear Family

[singlefather no more]

Hello Guys,

Well I was robbed a while back and it has been very rough. stupid me flagged downed a taxi in the evening.

I was set up by a taxi driver and he had 2 guys jump in and rob me on the way to our casa. He used a cell phone to make a call after he picked me up which I was told was the set up call. stupid me. He had a nearly new car and was well dressed so i thought it was safe.

Always call for a securo taxi .. Don´t repeat my mistake.

I flagged down a cab and did not call one at night.. big mistake and please don´t repeat my mistake.

They got my wedding ring , money , bank cards and wallet and glasses.

I am in one piece and ok.

I was and feel stupid , impotent , mad , upset and was scared [snip]less when robbed.
I got hurt at the end when they were dragging me out of the cab to dump me after they got everything. I thought they were going to kidnap me or something worse so I fought.

They took me out of the taxi and took my glasses well jumping me and making sure I did not see the taxi plate number. what a friggin nightmare. so be smart and dont repeat my mistake.

I was brought nearly to tears when Roxi various family members came by and gave her money to help us out. These are wonderful people my new family..

I walked for 10 minutes without glasses after being robbed but found our casa.

I am not going to repeat my mistake and still love Chiclayo.

I have to get new glasses soon as I am near sighted.

My children do not know about this at all.

The people of Chiclayo are very nice and a lot of people have come up to me and say they are embarressed that this happened to me in Chiclayo.

I take responsibilty my actions and for not knowing what to do and hopefully someone will learn from it.

The hard part is being in this financial position with my 2 children and my wife in Peru. Some people might say I was wrong to bring mu kids here but they are thriving and love it here. My son and daughter have been doing great.

My kids are sick right now with chest colds and we are going to take them to the doctor tonight. They both slept with Roxi last night as that what made them feel a little better and comforted.

They are in love with their new Mom Roxi and she treats them like gold. We have laughed like we have not laughed in years.. Roxi has a great sense of homor.

My son says his future wife is in Peru and loves all the kisses and hugs he gets every day from all the girls. He loves the muchachas and has really come out of his shell. My daughter loves it here and has made many girl friends.

In closing guys always call for a cab,

stupid gringo in peru,


Singlefather

.

[raycjs]

I want to thank all the guy's and you know who you are for stepping up and helping a good guy when he is down..


thank you all so very much

Ray

[jmcooper002]

I must say it is impressive how a friend in need can come to you, and you help him out like you did. That is true friendship. It seems to me that SFNM has had a rash of bad luck over the past two years, and I would probably lock all my windows and doors and hide under the bed if I had to encouter what he has.

Good luck to you SFNM I enjoy hearing about your adventures and I hope you will continue to keep posting. How have you adapted to the culture since you have been there? Has your wife been adjusting well to her new life with a husband and two kids? I think its great how your children are adapting, and am glad they are not as fearful now that they are in there new home.

Besides your incident recently do you feel pretty safe down there? Did you know Spanish before you got there or are you learning now? Anyway best wishes and I hope all goes well.

[Researcher]

    Hey SFNM,

         I hope you are doing well now.Getting robbed is always a possibilty.My wife`s brother recently got robbed when he went to pay tuition at the university he attends in Bogota.He had his girlfriend with him who would not stop screaming so they stabbed my brother in law.He is OK now. Taxis off the street can be dangerous.I always carry a "fake" wallet full of old credit cards and an ATM card from an old bank account. I usually carry a little money in it but put money in another pocket or even my shoe.It wont stop me from getting robbed but I would get satisfation from knowing some scum didnt get much out of me.

      Best of luck to you SFNM and keep us posted on your adventure.


 Researcher

[Gavan]

SingleFatherNoMore,

I am very sorry this happened to you after everything you have been trough. This type of thing happens all the time here in Peru. I have been here for more than 3 years now and nothing has happened to me, but I do not go out much on my own and always try to call a taxi at night. Everyone in my novia´s family has been mugged. Peru is great for a while, but I don´t think I will be staying here forever because of the safety issues.

If you are looking to make some extra money you should visit this site: www.warriorforum.com. Lots of helpful info there on how to make money on the internet. This is how I make a living here in Peru.

Take care,

Ken in Trujillo, Peru

[Brainiac]

SFNM, I am so sad this happened to you.  I wish I had warned you that you should only go out with a little cash and NO wallet.  I carry a photocopy of my passport and it I'm going to the ATM I just take the one card. 

Remember: Gringo equals TARGET!!!  It doesn't matter how nice the people are (and they are) you are perceived as rich.  It's simply that you're white and from North America: that's how they think.  Ask Roxi to take you to a Polvos Rosados or whatever they call it in Chiclayo and buy clothes Peruvians to wear so you'll fit in more.  You might even want to dye your hair for a time.  This is probably the worst that will happen to you, unless they find a way into your car or apartment.  Teach your children to be observant, too.  I don't know about kidnapping in Peru, but it could happen.  Don't be fooled by the easy smiles and laid-back attitude the people have: you really don't know what they are thinking.

Well, this is all after the fact, but I hope this is the last of your homework in the school of hard knocks for a long while.  Hang in there, get through the adjustment phase and it'll work out.  I think you did the right thing by your children by going there.

[lite sweet dude]

SFNM, didn't you also get robbed in Lima when you were down for your wedding? Then, the tribe mugged you in Canada. Man, you do seem to have some black cloud hovering over you.
I think you need to start packing heat or carrying a shank.

Rules to live by in Peru. No rings, nothing flashy, old clothes...try to dress like a wino. (My apologies to any winos out there.) Copy of your passport, no bank cards. Just enough soles to get by on or chump change as I like to call it. Taxis seguros or walk when you can.
Good luck, bro.

LSD

[Red Clay]

If you absolutely have to flag a taxi alone, a gringo friend of mine always picks the oldest, most docile-looking driver he can find. I realize that sf's particular driver had accomplices, however.

[Dave H]

Hey SFNM,

I am glad to hear it wasn't worse and that you are OK! Just consider it a good lesson!

I live in an affluent neighborhood in the Philippines. We are not walled and gated, which allows people to pass through, entering and leaving easily. There are more than the citywide average of petty thefts, burglaries, and robberies in my area. Just after dark a few weeks ago, I was parking my truck in our gated carport. I opened the gates and was walking to my truck outside, when I noticed that a commercial tricycle (motorcycle with sidecar) was parked in the middle of the intersection (I'm on corner) with it's motor running and lights out. I realized that it was odd since they always shut down if they will be waiting for more than a few seconds, as at a traffic light. Suddenly, a man jumped out and approached me rapidly. Then he pulled a knife when he was about 10 feet away. I was ready! I turned and smiled, revealing a “pistola” which  I leveled between his eyes. He screamed and ran back to the tricycle! Jumping in as it took off down the street at a high rate of speed. I had a good laugh, as my “pistola” was really a  telescoping steel baton. I was a bit disappointed I didn't get to use it on his head! I also had my pepper spray and a big combat knife as backup. I am thinking about buying a bullwhip for some real fun!   But, my real backup was that my wife was watching (as she always does) from the balcony (sometimes from behind the gate). I was really only worried that she was going to snipe the guy from the ol' belltower before I had a chance to have some fun.   You might consider a gun (legal or illegal-throw down)...if you are willing to pull the trigger.

The moral of the story: BE PREPARED, HAVE A PLAN (and a backup or two), BE ALERT, AND BE AWARE!

There are some areas I stay out of, especially at certain times.  I seldom go around town after dark and then I go with Filipinos, not Kanos (Gringos). Being on fire rescue for 19 years, I found that more bad things happen after dark than during daylight hours. I am not from here and still a bit unaware of all of the dangers that are lurking. Overall, I have also found that it is much safer here than in South Florida...and most people are MUCH friendlier!

Dave

[Gromit]

It's too late to nominate Singlefather for an Academy Award this Sunday.  If he were in the running I'm sure he would have taken an Oscar home for best actor.

I hate to kick a guy when he's down as he is in the process of getting a divorce from his Peruvian wife but it's high time that someone set the record straight about SFNM.  I would like to warn others in case anyone is thinking about helping him out.  Had I known that Single Father was using people and borrowing money without intending to pay anything back I would not have helped him.  

A lot of well meaning people donated as well as loan him money.  There were at least two different forum fund raisers to help him and his family that I'm aware of.  It was easy to feel compassion and empathize with him not only for the inordinate amount of problems he and his family went through but he is a likable guy as well as a good poster who was willing to share his private life with us.  I now believe he intentionally did this to pull on people's heart strings to obtain financial assistance.  I was one of the people who got duped into sending in a contribution to assist him and his family then later loaning him money when he told me privately about more dire straights he was in.  I know of at least three other people that loaned him money with SFNM's empty promises to pay them back.

I was embarrassed to post this information earlier after realizing I had been fooled into helping someone who didn't really deserve it.  As I stated above, I hope that people will think twice about helping out someone who I believe lied about many circumstances in order to obtain additional sympathy.

I'm sure this post will encourage a few others with a similar story regarding SFNM to come forward.

Yes, "Single Father, Please Read" as I'd enjoy hearing your response.

[Gato4Astrid]

Everyone keeps saying not to send money without ever meeting, so why should it be different to SFNM ?!!

[JimD]

sfnm sounds like a rough night for sure. In Cali they call that a "paseo millionario". However it goes down differently from your experience. They don´t just take your cards and throw you out of the car as in your case instead they take you and your cards to ATM machines and withdraw money with them. In some cases they´ll sort of kidnap you because some cards allow only a limited number of withdrawals in a twenty four hour period. It sounds like you were jumped by some pretty dumb crooks if all they did was take your cards. Wouldn´t do them much good with out your pin. Luckily you no doubt have your account numbers and emergeny numbers anotated some where safe so you can just get on the phone and have them FEDEX new cards to you. Should only take a few days.

[Gromit]

Everyone keeps saying not to send money without ever meeting, so why should it be different to SFNM ?!!

Gato,

Some of us have met Single Father and vouched for him on the board.  That was good enough for many to contribute.  

I'm curious and maybe Raycjs can fill us in on how much he received in donations just from this one forum.  

Jim,

Tell me you didn't read my post.  I have serious doubts if SFNM was robbed.  I think it was a ruse to garner more sympathy in order to line his pockets from others generosity.  

He's lied to me and others to get more sympathy so why not tell more lies on the forum to reach a bigger audience.  Some had questions regarding his "unfortunate circumstances" yet he conveniently avoided answering them.

I did find out that his former wife did die as he stated but all the other hard luck stories he shared (there are many) I have serious doubts about there validity.  This guy is a con man and needed exposing.

[Researcher]

    Well Gromit, with as few posts as you have and being a newbie I doubt if you get anyone here to believe you without proof.

       I take things at face value if there is no harm in it but you are making some pretty serious accusations here so I'm having trouble believing you.


       Researcher

[Gromit]

A reasonable statement Researcher but wrong conclusion.  I do have all the records about loaning him money and SFNM's written promise as to when he'd be paying me back.  I don't think it would be appropriate to post this proof on the forum.

One other poster that was scammed by Single Father has told me that he'll be sharing his experiences here which might put your doubts to rest.  I'm sure there are others, whether they come forward is a different matter.

[Bob_S]

...I do have all the records about loaning him money and SFNM's written promise as to when he'd be paying me back.  I don't think it would be appropriate to post this proof on the forum.

How much would be appropriate?  Can you scan it and black-box censor out personal info that would not best be shared?  Would the admin here allow it?

[Fuzzyone]

    Well Gromit, with as few posts as you have and being a newbie I doubt if you get anyone here to believe you without proof.

       I take things at face value if there is no harm in it but you are making some pretty serious accusations here so I'm having trouble believing you.


       Researcher

   Researcher

     When he was still in Canada, do you remember he went to the hospital. After that S.F. came back and claimed he had been robbed. Then he stated he was mugged by the indians who made it their life to get him at all cost. I found his home town newspaper and read online every day for the entire month this happened. Guess what no mention of anything like that happening.  I was married to a Peruvian woman for 4 years and I knew it was only going to be a matter of time before someone was shown the door!

[Researcher]

      Fuzzyone, that certainly doesn't look good on SFNM. Did he ever say that it was reported to the police or newspapers?



    Researcher