Who wants to hear Wm3's Philippine and Thai marriage horror stories???

[Cbear]

I do I do, LOL

Ok, William, were ready, we can handle the truth.

[piglett]

Ok explain it to up in terms that we can understand 
& don't be shy

[bcc_1_2]

it has been awhile since i've searched for it... but the net is loaded with stories like this. haven't you read enough of them? i can remember one ending with an english teacher being chased by his g/f with a knife.

[Cbear]

I want a first had experience from a reliable source. Internet stories are just that, stories.

I remember one about an expat living in the Philippines, his wife decided she didn't want him anymore so she accused him of beating her half to death. Even though the neighbors knew she was lying they said nothing. He fled the Philippines and can never return, of course he will divorce her which gives her the right to remarry. Only now she has all his assets which he invested in the Philippines.

I wonder if it is true, but sure sounds believable.

[bcc_1_2]

eeehhh, look i say get to know your woman. if a retired old man goes down for an AFA social and gets engaged he gets what he has coming to him.

But I took my time. I picked the girl with the right values and traits... and I don't think I'll have any of those issues. Plus she is coming to my country to live with me.

These stories are all generally written by the guys... and they may very well have been screwed by a physco asian chick... but seriously how many red flags did they ignore?

If you stay around long enough for something to turn into a horror story doesn't that at least partially fall on the guy? If you just want horror stories for your entertainment... does it really matter if it is fiction or non fiction?

[william3rd]

Got some Colombian tales too.

I will try to get something up tonight. I have a short trial tomorrow before I fly out.

AFA socials and success are two completely opposite propositions for a guy looking for a wife.

[Cbear]

Yes it matters if it is fiction or not. Non fiction only.

Look, most of the guys on here who are really researching this will probably not make the mistakes so many non educated men make. (non educated means guys not taking the time to learn before they jump)

I think a lot of these quickie marriages are to bar girls and prostitutes or very desperate girls. I don't think any good Filipina girl would marry someone after just meeting them.

I know that back when the military was in the Philippines that over 1000 marriages occurred each year from bar girls to servicemen. having lived there during this time I can tell you that those bar girls didn't give a chit about the man they married. After having slept with hundreds of men, why would they want to settle for just one man.

 The stigmatism that comes with being a prostitute can never be washed off, even if it benefited her family enormously so she has no honor to protect anymore, so divorce means nothing to her.

A bar girl is so used to manipulating people and getting the things she wants in this way that it is nearly impossible for her to change. I remember being stationed in California after I had returned from the Philippines. The former bar girls, now divorced always hung around the base, and guess what they were doing???  

So lets here some of Wm3s real stories, it will be educational.

[bcc_1_2]

I think a lot of these quickie marriages are to bar girls and prostitutes or very desperate girls. I don't think any good Filipina girl would marry someone after just meeting them.

Well in Colombia if you are a decent looking young gringo who has a job you can get engaged to smoking hotties who aren't bar girls or hookers pretty fast (if that's what you want to do). I could have come back with a girl so smoking hot your eyes would pop out of your head... if i wanted to. But i had zero interest in spoiled girls... so if you modeled i wasn't really interested.

i did happen to snag a knockout however .

[william3rd]

OK- guys- here is the first story from the early days of catalogues and before the internet. From my book "From Russia and Elsewhere-Seldom With Love"

This is the adventure of "Thai Steve." He is a real person who I have known for 20 years. We used to all hang around the same Thai restaurant swapping game plans-

Steve borrowed my "Thai Ladies" catalogue and tried to do some fishing. He sent out six reply letters, and after four letter exchanges with three of the selections, went to Thailand for a month to meet them all. He had received a better response rate than I had as he had never been married before and had no children of his own. He was writing only to single women without children.

He returned home empty-handed with the opinion that most of these women were liars.
Upon his return to the United States, he explained to me how the much-planned and awaited meetings turned into a series of nightmares as soon as he had arrived and that he had spent the last three of the weeks of his trip with ladies of ill-repute just so that his month of vacation in Thailand was not a total waste of time.
Upon his arrival, he was supposed to be met by his number one choice at Don Muang Airport- an ample bosomed nymphet with a slim waist sparkling eyes.

As he was walking out of the arrival hall, he was looking for his lady friend based on the pictures that he had received. As his eyes glanced expectantly back and forth across the crowded arrival hall, he kept seeing this one moon-shaped (and sized) face looking right at him as if the person knew him. The woman owning the rather overly large face and triple chins was smiling at him almost expectantly as he continued to look for the woman who was supposed to meet him. As he walked past the woman, she called out his name. He looked, started, looked again and was stunned at what he was seeing.
Looking more closely at the gigantic creature before him he noticed that beneath the chin rolls and puffy cheeks, the woman bore a slight resemblance to the slim young woman who he was supposed to meet. Perhaps her mother or older sister had come to meet him instead?

Ironically, the woman’s name was “Noi” which means “small” or “little” in the Thai language. The woman before him was anything but small. As he apologized to her for not recognizing her, she allowed as how the pictures were “a couple of years old” and she had “gained a little weight” since they had been taken. He felt that the statements were definitely “understatements” of “mammoth” proportions.
 
His “mail-order” girlfriend had made hotel arrangements for him and helped him get situated in his room and let him know that since the formalities were already previously discussed in their letters, that she was prepared to spend the night with him as soon as he was ready-like right then. Concealing his disgust and dismay, he told her of the long arduous plane flight from the United States and wanted the evening off to sleep. She agreed that an evening of rest might make him feel better and promised to pick him up in the morning at 9AM to take a tour of the Bangkok Metropolis.
Hoping that a night of sleep may somehow make his tour guide deflate in size or that he would wake up from the nightmare, he slept the night away. Arising fairly early, he breakfasted on the veranda of the hotel.  As he finished his breakfast, he saw the portly shape of his tour guide and bride to be a long way down the street approaching majestically as the crowded sidewalk parted around her like the bow wave of a steam ship. At the time, immensely overweight Thai women were unusual to see and he could see by the passers by’s head-turning and laughter that he was in a highly unusual situation.
Touring the temples with his guide, he was reminded of a picture that he had seen of an elephant with its mahout in part due to the Thai words he was hearing from other tourists as they progressed such as “chahn” which means “elephant.”

Since tour guiding is hungry work, his companion shortly suggested lunch. Thai Steve agreed as this was as good a time as any to discuss the disparity in the pictures. While wolfing down a meal fit for a stevedore or two, Noi allowed as how the pictures were more than a couple of years out of date-just a few years out of date and that she could lose the weight easily AFTER they were married. And that they may as well get the sexual issues out of the way as quickly as possible-like as soon as they returned to Steve’s hotel room. Steve did not really need to feign illness at this point and he claimed fatigue and fever. Noi offered to stay to care for him and Steve declined but agreed that she could return in a few hours to check up on him. Noi agreed to do so and hoped that they could begin their nuptials when she returned with her things to stay in his room with him for the rest of his stay. And maybe he would like to move into her place in a couple of days since he would not have to pay for the hotel room?
As soon as Noi had left the hotel, Steve immediately packed his belongings, called another hotel several miles away, paid for his room and left via taxi praying fervently that Noi would not return before he left. At one point in his preparation for flight, he even considered climbing down to the street via the fire escape outside his window in case Noi appeared in the lobby. He never saw or heard from her again.
 
Steve’s journey now took him to the north of Thailand to the picturesque city of Chiang Mai where his second choice awaited him. Chiang Mai airport was not a crowded airport and the Thai Airways domestic flight was not a full flight. By the time that he had claimed his luggage, there was only one person left waiting for passengers. This was an older woman who looked somewhat like the pictures that he had received from Miss Number Two. He had received college graduation pictures but this woman was several years out of college. He stayed long enough to have lunch and dinner with her and then told her straight out that he had come seeking the woman in the pictures and that she had understated her age, thus misrepresenting herself. The woman agreed that she had done so but while he was there, maybe he would like to give a relationship a try anyway since he had traveled so far and they had seemed to like each other via letters and telephone contacts. Steve declined and had an evening exploring the town by himself before returning to Bangkok in the morning to meet his last choice.
Upon his arrival, Steve checked into his hotel located on Sukhumvit Road and called the last of his three choices. The call was answered by a very young woman who spoke perfect English and who informed Thai Steve that HER MOTHER was working at that moment. She also told Thai Steve that her mother was expecting his call and that he could call back in a few hours to arrange their meeting. Keep in mind that Steve had only been writing to single young women without children. Now Steve was confronted by a situation where the woman might be single and might still be fairly young but definitely had a child and not a young child, either. There is no error in translation when states that they have NO children. Rather than call back to arrange a meeting with Miss/Ms./Mrs. Number Three, Steve spent the remainder of his trip seeing the country and seeing other Thai women with lower goals, who had no interest in marriage or a longer term relationship than the evening at hand.
By the time I had heard of the odyssey of Thai Steve, I was preparing to go over to meet just one Thai woman. This was my Number Five choice. Needless to say, for reasons remarkably similar to Thai Steve’s adventures, things did not work out with Miss Number Five when we met in person and I terminated a planned vacation trip with her to southern Thailand.

[piglett]

eeehhh, look i say get to know your woman. if a retired old man goes down for an AFA social and gets engaged he gets what he has coming to him.

I think ur rite on the money there.
Im sure i could get a super hot chick  & maybe it would even work
I don't think this would be the case with a dude who's 65 years old at least the part about it working would be a long shot. I still have people thinking i am in my mid to late 20's even though i am turning 40 in October.
I decided that finding a lady that was a good person inside was WAY more inportant that finding a super hottie that was not so nice inside. Don't get me wrong i don't want a girl that's so fugly that I could only have sex with her with a bag on her head & a second over my head incase her's should fall off.  

piglett

[bcc_1_2]

I don't think this would be the case with a dude who's 65 years old at least the part about it working would be a long shot. I still have people thinking i am in my mid to late 20's even though i am turning 40 in October.
I decided that finding a lady that was a good person inside was WAY more inportant that finding a super hottie that was not so nice inside.

Sadly guys older than 65 are there chasing after girls who'd be at their prom in the USA.  Anyways I'm not going to lie beauty mattered. If you weren't a 9 or a 10 in my book you didn't get considered. I was generally looking for any reason to narrow the pool of women.

I would assume in Manilla, Cebu City, etc there are so many hotties that narrowing them all down would be a hell of a challenge.

This story hasn't exactly been a horror story. I know its an old one and I'm sure things have changed since then. But I met plenty of women I turned out not to be that interested in. I just moved on. If I was afraid they'd go nuts on me I just sent them an email or talked to them on the phone. Generally if they were pushy about setting more things up I'd just tell them it wasn't going to work out. Just cut em loose and move on to the next one.

[piglett]

Sadly guys older than 65 are there chasing after girls who'd be at their prom in the USA. 

I think that in some cases you may have it the other way around
the 18 year old is chasing the 65 year old dude.
Many of these ladies from 3rd world countrys will marry the 1st american that walks through the door in order to help their family out with money.

Even my girl made mention that she would sacrifice her self in order to help her family.
this is coming from a lady who's a nurse & has been working in that field for 5 years.
However there is a difference between "would" & "will"

[Dave H]

Hey William,

I know it is supposed to be a horror story...but that is some very funny she-it!!!
I think they used your book for their MOB episodes in the British comedy "Little Britain." The elephant lady sure sounds like "Ting Tong Macadangdang" from Tooting, Thailand!

Dave

[william3rd]

Saw some of that Brit comedy. Funny  BTW- Ting tong is a real thai expression- loosely translated  as "addled"

This adventure was 1990. And was real. a different world then.

More tomorrow.

Got work to do.

[Dave H]

Hey Willaim,

That is some great stuff...educational as well as funny! The best stories are usually the real ones! PLEASE, keep them coming!

Dave

[bcc_1_2]

I think that in some cases you may have it the other way around
the 18 year old is chasing the 65 year old dude.
Many of these ladies from 3rd world countrys will marry the 1st american that walks through the door in order to help their family out with money.

its mutual. even if the old man didn't go down there for the 18 year old. well i just expect more class. i expect less from a girl with heavy financial and family pressure. but i've heard stories of young ladies being treated a lot worse than from a lonely old man. And I am a rationalist... there is a such thing as one evil being worse than another i suppose.

[piglett]

Yes bcc i think from what i have heard pinoys don't always treat their wived so nice, so i guess some ladies figure that a man old enough to be their grand farther mite be a better grade of poor.

desperate times call for desperate measures

[graham888]

i just do not understand why not look for some one close to your own age??

[Cbear]

i just do not understand why not look for some one close to your own age??

Your either joking or a true lib. 

Fertility, needed if you want healthy children.

Let's be real here, most woman over 30 carry a lot of baggage, kids, ex husbands, or are just plain awful people. I don't want some bitter woman who hates men. Or some woman with someone else's children that I won't be allowed to discipline in my own house. No way I want that again.

Any truly single woman over 30, especially overseas probably isn't much of a catch. Why hasn't someone already snagged her? You know she has got problems of some sort if she is an attractive never been married, no kids woman. So why marry that kind of trouble???

I am divorced and I don't ever want divorced again, so why invite trouble with a high risk woman.

Just from my research and own personel experience I don't think an age gap of 20 or so years is a major problem, however, I think 30 or 40 years is a stretch but even some of those marriages last until the death of the older partner. People marry for a lot of different reasons, not always for love. I think most marriages on earth are not for love anyway, they are of necessity.

Just for the flip side, and I have posted this before. I recently saw a young man with a much older Filipina lady, Obviously very much in love going by the way they interacted with each other, now is anyone gonna say this was bad. Older lady and a young guy, of course not, it's a double standard.

Just look at the new tv shows about cougars......... acceptable........, but it sure isn't OK if a man does it. Oh no, can't let a man do that. If a woman does it "it's you go girl" but if a man does it "he's a dirty old man"

Look at how many high school teachers (female) get away with having sex with minors, but when a man does it, they throw the book at him. (I don't condone sex with minors, I'm just making a point.)

So in short, why would I want a woman who I know is going to be hard to get along with, bitter about past relationships, and probably has kids that aren't mine that I don't want to raise. (read support but not be allowed to be a father too) I don't, so I will search for a younger lady without these problems.

Now back to our originally scheduled thread, Wm3, do you have some stories of Fil-Am marriage disasters?

[Dave H]

Why do guys marry younger ladies? I am sure feminists and liberals will say it is to boost their ego and a midlife crisis for middleaged men. But, older Filipinas are usually married and have children, which creates a major obstacle  (annulment) and baggage. Also most young Filipinas prefer to marry a man from 40 up to infinity.  When I ask young Filipinas why they want to marry a much older man, they all say that an older man is more stable, responsible, kind, and less likely to womanize. I know many young Filipinas married to older Filipinos as well. At 52, I am considered in my prime. I got more attention at the mall today than the gwapo, early 20's Kano I saw.

Dave

[bcc_1_2]

wow guys no need to get too worked up... when the first post by someone is asking why a 65 year old man doesn't want to marry a 65 year old woman... well hey just so we know who you are graham why not introduce yourself.

From what i've seen in my short time on message boards are people that (mostly women i suspect with issues to what is on boards like this) create accounts and try and push an agenda. then when posters push back they leave. the adult thing to do would be to create an account as a female... post  your issues... debate if you want... then politely move on.

You find gringo latina age gaps too of course. And even if I was 10 years older I'd still be looking for a woman in her 20s. Two rules I had were no kids and never married.

[Jeff S]

At the risk of igniting yet another age pizzin contest....

It's difficult for some guys, particularly younger guys exposed all of their lives to the modern American feminism, and who are fixated on women's looks, to understand that women aren't thinking the same thing as they are. Because they think it would be gross to hook up with a gray haired, wrinkly women, they think that women feel the same way as they do. It's inconceivable to them that a younger woman could actually love an older guy. The only possible conclusion they can conceive is that he turns her stomach. but she'll swallow her bile for the money.  They know little about how women feel or what motivates them. The May/December marriages I know about do not follow that imagined caricature and are more about love than they are about money/security/fear. If they've been paying attention, older guys can know a lot more about what women want and can often fulfill their emotional needs more than guys with a less mature outlook.

[william3rd]

sorry, hijackers. I am done.  . . .

[Ray]

Well said Jeff!

[Capstone]

Any truly single woman over 30, especially overseas probably isn't much of a catch. Why hasn't someone already snagged her? You know she has got problems of some sort if she is an attractive never been married, no kids woman. So why marry that kind of trouble???

Wow - this, without a doubt, has to be one of the most ignorant and uninformed posts that I have ever read.

My fiancée is 32, has never been married, no kids, speaks perfect English, is well educated, extremely intelligent, very attractive, had a great job in China and has a pretty hefty bank account to boot. Yes, definitely sounds like a loser to me.  Why don't you do us all a favor and buy yourself a clue before you make any more idiotic posts!!