Trip Report Barranquilla, from 11 FEB through 17 FEB

[minotoro]

Well,

I head there tonight finally, I have been contemplating this trip for about a year now, see what happens. If anything I will enjoy myself and leave vegas for about a week. Been talking with a sweetheart for about three weeks, she will meet me at the airport tomorrow =).

[Pivery]

Good luck minotoro!

Man, that's such a great feeling to be on that plane. Hope all goes well for you and if you have time, let us all know how things are going. 

Pivery

[Alabamaboy!]

I'll be there for back up if you need me in a couple days. Sounds like you already got a solid game plan however.  Good luck.

[minotoro]

well here it is,

First and Foremost! I am in love! I have never in my life been treated by a woman the way i was just treated these past 6 days. All of her attention was for me and she took great care of me by dealing with taxi's, and pretty much everyone in general.

I met my girl through Jamies Agency a few weeks before I decided to go down there. Talked to many but none were like my future wife.

I elected to stay at the beach place that Jaime Offers, which is a great comfortable place to stay, has a comp. This is my only thing Jaime, Can you plz put some tvs in the rooms? =) and a phone so we can call locally at least in each room? Besides that the place is safe great and has nice views, i loved it. The lady that works there is extremely helpful. the rooms are neat and clean, bathrooms are big and there is much storage areas. if i were to go back to barranquilla I would stay at jaimes again.

I really did not know what to expect from Colombia. I was nervous and had many shots on the way there to ease things =). I got there and it was a bit intimidating at first (at least for me) in the airport, but as soon as i got out my girl was waiting for me. I could have set up appointments with many girls while there, but I was going just for one that was it had my mind made up, and those were the best 6 days ever.

My girl speaks perfect english so i did not need a translator and well i Speak perfect Spanish. Communication was great.

First night we went to a restaurant that I forgot the name of and is sooo goood, after that we walked to a place to have a beer. I was simply in awe and amazed by her, couldnt keep my eyes off of her and she was alll about me making sure i was comfortable. She took me to Jaimes place at around ten and then headed home.

the next day she was there to pick kme up at 7:30 am, we went to the romantic museum an arts museum and had lunch at the Cave (highly recommend). After that we went to puerto colombia and walked on the beach, dinner was at a nice italian restaurant. She made sure I ate, she fed me, cut the food in pieces and fed me, i felt so well, no woman here would ever do that.

Ahh by the way I have never in my life been kissed so much in one day. she gave me kisses from 7 am to 10 pm, nonstop =).

Next day we went to Santa Marta, it was amazing there! it is calm, the beach is great and my girl was even better =). I also met her family which were skeptical about this whole agency thing (mom and dad), they are wonderful people.

Following day went to boca de cenisas, to buena vista mall (wow there is some talent there), and to dance salsa.

The next few days we were buying artisan things here and there and spending a lot of quality time together.

In sum, Barranquilla, while maybe not the cleanest has amazing people. I met my future wife there. im in love.

I will go back to Medellin to see her in April as she is moving there this week. We will begin the fiancee visa process  as soon as we can.

you know what is bad though? I am missing my woman so much and want to go back right now!!!! =)

[Pivery]

  Wow!

Nice post. Every time I hear a trip story, I rewind my time there and brings a big smile. 

Pivery

[Caballero2009]

Well Min,

This is awesome and exactly what I know can happen.

This is what I have dreamed of for years and I KNOW it can happen.

Reality: you can have a horrible experience as well as many have had.

Reality TOO: You can have an awesome trip, find your special colombian lady, and have a super life.

What decides which happens? I dont know. Sounds like you took the buy email thing first  like im trying to do.

But i have known some colombian couples a few years ago in college and I know EXACTLY what you mean when you say they treat their men like kings... kisses...dancing... hugs... make their food.... and in return you know what they want: Love. Honesty. loyalty. and its sad how many guys cannot provide those 3 things to wonderful ladies....

Well I know how to treat a lady... i am a caballero... and im hoping my future outcome is like yours. Im doing all the preparation i can to see to it.

Gratz on your special colombian lady!

[Tallman]

Did you meet her on line first? How long did you communicate on the net before meeting personally? You wrote to her first and then she responded?
I assume this was your first meeting.

Some people say you should waite for a second and third meetings, before filing for visa.

[minotoro]

Yeah I met her online first. I had been doing that for the past year with other girls thoughout Colombia and I never went there. so I think it is cool if you meet someone online but you have to be determined to actually go see them and have some dates.

After 3 days of talking with her I made up my mind and purchased a ticket to Colombia to see her. She is all I wanted and more I had my mind made up and I wasnt going to meet anyone else. She is Highly educated, well spoken, speaks perfect English, funny, has a great sense of humor, is simple, and loves me!!

I am going back to Barranquilla in 23 days!!! to get to know her family more, I met them the first time around and will go spend some more time with them and get to know them better. The brother calls me cunado and her sis does too =).

I highly recommend Jaimes 30 Email service, and staying at Jaimes when you get there. He has taxi drivers that know his clients, are punctual, and I felt safe with them. I believe that staying with Jaime for my first trip was the best thing I could do.

[Richard77]

You sure do mention jamies a lot.

[bcc_1_2]

You sure do mention jamies a lot.

A lot of people do on this board. Before Sean took him to task I had only heard good things. Its pretty clear he goes out and gets lots of girls to sign up. And that will atract a lot of single guys from the USA drooling over hot latinas.

[JR33]

   Thats great Min,
             You are proof that guys can accomplish the same result without dropping $1500 in 3 days.
     
             Good luck filing your CR1 and getting married there.

[Looking4Wife]

well here it is,

First and Foremost! I am in love! I have never in my life been treated by a woman the way i was just treated these past 6 days. All of her attention was for me and she took great care of me by dealing with taxi's, and pretty much everyone in general.

I met my girl through Jamies Agency a few weeks before I decided to go down there. Talked to many but none were like my future wife.


... I was going just for one that was it had my mind made up, and those were the best 6 days ever.

Ahh by the way I have never in my life been kissed so much in one day. she gave me kisses from 7 am to 10 pm, nonstop =).

... I will go back to Medellin to see her in April as she is moving there this week. We will begin the fiancee visa process  as soon as we can.

Ok, I'll be the bad guy and say what some others more experienced are thinking... what's the rush?

Many people have gone down to Colombia (aka "Disney World", the "Land of Paradise", or "The Candy Store") and become enamored instantly.  Yes, the women are extremely hot, sexy, , yes the women are more affectionate than any you've ever encountered, yes they are more attentive to their men...

HOWEVER that does not make them any more ready for INSTANT MARRIAGE, any more than any other woman on the planet.

I would highly encourage you to take your time, and get to know this woman, and for you to know her, over the space of a year or more before even beginning the marriage process.  Give yourself a chance to observe her in different situations that you can only fantasize about how she will respond at this moment.

Marriage is a challenge no matter where your wife comes from.  You may as well slant the odds in your favor by allowing you and your future wife TIME to see how compatible you REALLY are... or aren't.

Best wishes to you and your girl with whatever you decide to do 

[Maria]

Hey monitoro,
Please take all this time that you writting to each other to really learn about who you really are. So when you go to Med in April you are 100% sure that she is the one.
Don't focus on "we are getting married". Focus on how will the 2 of you adapt to eachother's personalities and life styles.

It is a time to be happy to have found love but a time to learn learn and learn some more...


Best of luck!!!

FL

[singlefather no more]

I agree with looking4wife .. What is the hurry about getting married after you have known this girl for 5 weeks on the Internet and 1 week in person..

But hey if you are in love go for it but take your time.. She is not going anywhere ..

All the best,

singlefather no more


.

[minotoro]

yeah I agree with u guys =).

Marriage wouldnt be until the end of the year if it were to happen. I will have gone to Colombia at least 6 times by then. Actually I will be there in 15 days =) in Barranquilla, and will interact with her family more than the first trip. I want to know her well and her family. Thank you for all of your advice, I will keep it in mind.


Actually thats why my first marriage here in the states failed, i knew her for 2 months and married her =/, little did I know of what I was getting myself into.

[Looking4Wife]

Marriage wouldnt be until the end of the year if it were to happen.

The problem with this reasoning is that the DECISION to marry has already been made, OR will most likely be made some months prior to the actual wedding date, right?  This means that the decision to marry is being made after only "knowing" the girl for a few months.  Would you do that in the USA... again?

You are being blinded by the logistics of travel, money, the desire to be in the presence of your soulmate, etc... and let's not forget the beauty, the special treatment, etc.

I speak from experience.  I wish that my wife and I had waited longer and ironed out some issues prior to marriage that we had to deal with inside of marriage.  These issues would've been much more easily dealt with outside of marriage.

By my wife's own admission... after the fact... she wasn't as prepared for many aspects of married life as she would have been had we waited longer. 

Actually thats why my first marriage here in the states failed, i knew her for 2 months and married her =/, little did I know of what I was getting myself into.

Again, I'm willing to be the bad guy here.  Please read your own words above and combine them with mine.  In fact paste your own words by your computer where you can see it every time you do a video chat with your novia. 

Less than 2 months from MEETING this NEW person, you have already made a decision to marry.  Do you see a pattern here? 

This is the problem:  Once we make the decsion to marry, we automatically OVERLOOK problems that are best resolved before marriage, due to our escalated level of commitment.  We all want to follow through on our "commitments" right?  This is why we proceed to rush into marriages too quickly after having made the decision to marry... too quickly.

Well that's my 2,000 pesos 

Bendiciones

[Pivery]

  Good advice L4W,

But could you, without prying too deep, give us some general idea of things or issues that may possibly be overlooked when you are in that point of love when you're not thinking straight?

Thanks,

Pivery

[utopiacowboy]

  Good advice L4W,

But could you, without prying too deep, give us some general idea of things or issues that may possibly be overlooked when you are in that point of love when you're not thinking straight?

Thanks,

Pivery

One of the problems is all the blood is in some other part of your body instead of your head where it could be helping you think straight.

[Pivery]

  Yes Utopiacowboy, you are correct sir!

When you have some young, stunning woman that covers you constantly with hugs and kisses and proclaiming their love for you non-stop I could see where one head takes over from where the other should be in charge. Like the devil and the angel on Animal House!

[Maria]

  Funny thing....

[Looking4Wife]

  Good advice L4W, But could you, without prying too deep, give us some general idea of things or issues that may possibly be overlooked when you are in that point of love when you're not thinking straight?

Surely this is a rhetorical question?

It's like asking a blind man which part of the traffic accident he didn't see :-)

[Pivery]

  L4W,

I am afraid that I am not following you. I find nothing rhetorical about my question in the least. If you are making statements about what men are overlooking and there were things in your relationship that were not carefully considered, how can we learn from your mistakes if they are not eleborated on?

As I said earlier, nothing too close to the bone if it's too personal.

Pivery

[Looking4Wife]

  L4W,

I am afraid that I am not following you. I find nothing rhetorical about my question in the least. If you are making statements about what men are overlooking and there were things in your relationship that were not carefully considered, how can we learn from your mistakes if they are not eleborated on?

As I said earlier, nothing too close to the bone if it's too personal.

Pivery

Sorry, Pivery, I really thought it was rhetorical.

My point about the "blind man" is that if you violate the common sense rule of not taking enough time to get to know the person, then you are increasing the odds that something
will be overlooked.

From this standpoint, the specifics of my situation are irrelevant.  If you are blind (i.e. lovestruck), then you liable to overlook anything and everything.

There are certain qualities that people are able to hide up front.  We all do it to a certain extent as we are trying to put our best foot forward.

For example (not my situation, but does it matter?):  suppose that someone meets a girl from Colombia, with or without an agency.  The guy flies down, meets the girl, and they are in love.  Rainbows are everywhere, and the sun is always shining.  After 2 weeks of sugar plums dancing in their heads, the guy flies back home. 

They chat, they do video chats, they email, they call, etc.  They're in communication daily, and getting to know each other much better.  They even have a few minor disagreements.  That are quickly resolved without incident.

They resolve to get married the next time he goes to Colombia in 4 months, and they do.  Beautiful wedding.  Actual angels could be heard, not seen mind you, but heard singing.  A week later, the guy flies back to the USA.

On his next visit, he discovers something that he never knew before... she has a violent temper.  They have a big argument about something... nothing really... and she starts throwing things... breaking expensive things... in fact his head would've been hit had he not ducked in time.  She curses at him for the first time.  Who knew?  What other things have been overlooked in this situation, simply because they never had a CHANCE to be uncovered?  Who knows?  He COULD have known had more time been invested prior to marriage getting to know this girl in a wider variety of situations.

Now this is a typical example of what could be overlooked by not enough face time, and/or rushing into a marriage without having the opportunity to observe someone in a large enough variety of situations, over time, to get a fuller picture of how the rest of your life will be with this person.

So there are innumerable things that could be overlooked.  I might overlook something different than you would, and something different than the next guy, etc.  The important thing is you must allow yourself enough time to get to know ANY potential mate, and just because the woman is overseas doesn't change the rules of common sense.  The problem is that when people are in love (or lust), common sense often goes out the window.

[Pivery]

  L4W,

Appreciate your response, very enlightening. Now I understand your perspective. I find it interesting the way you see these situations that could unfold.

There will obviously always be differering opinions to waiting to get to know a woman better as opposed to just grabbing her hand and run to the nearest justice of the peace. I was married for almost 15 years and there were things that I did not know about my, but did not cause the collapse of the marriage. Simply little quirks that popped up from time to time. Some guys find a woman get married and live happily ever after. Some guys will make 15 trips to visit and problems erupt. As individuals, this is a totally individual situation that happens differently for everyone involved.

I guess what I am trying to get from your statement is how much time is enough when you have convinced yourself that you indeed know this person and all of their quirks well enough to marry them? How many trips? There is no chart to refer to here. Especially at that apex of the feeling of love, it's very difficult to step on the brakes and tell your significant other, "Hold on, I haven't got you totally figured out yet..."


Without being argumentative and with all due respect, I am not recommending that anyone to get married or wait, because there is simply no real concrete way of ticking all of these things off of a list. It would not be my place to tell anyone to wait or to rush in, as I do not know these people and it's their decision. Yes, I agree that without living together like the majority of us do here in the states first would be a good indicator of compatability, however with the distance and time factors involved with a foreign companion, I'm not sure how much of this can be done.

My lady lives in Barranquilla. I wish that I could spend oodles of time with her, but right now it's just not feasible. I did not really know my wife all that well and were married for 15 years. Some other couple could live together for 2 months or 2 years and get married and the whole thing comes apart. Relationships and the longevity of them are simply a roll of the dice. Who knows...

Pivery

[Looking4Wife]

Some guys find a woman get married and live happily ever after. Some guys will make 15 trips to visit and problems erupt. As individuals, this is a totally individual situation that happens differently for everyone involved.

I guess what I am trying to get from your statement is how much time is enough when you have convinced yourself that you indeed know this person and all of their quirks well enough to marry them? How many trips? There is no chart to refer to here.

there is simply no real concrete way of ticking all of these things off of a list. It would not be my place to tell anyone to wait or to rush in,

Relationships and the longevity of them are simply a roll of the dice. Who knows...

Pivery

You make some great points that I agree with, and there is no way to know anything in advance.  However, common sense dictates that you can slant the odds in your favor by investing more time to get to know someone in advance of marrying or (better yet) making the decision to marry.

How much time?  That's obviously a personal call.  Unfortunately in the case of a bride on foreign soil, resources, immigration laws, and logistics weigh heavily into our decisions.  I think I suggested in this thread or another one, waiting at least 1-2 years (whether a foreign or domestic bride). 

That's my personal opinion, and I have no problem suggesting it to others because it makes sense.  If I suggest someone to wait, it's like telling somebody to sleep on it.  If its a good idea tonight, it'll be a better idea in the morning.  Of course if they ignore my advice, rush in head first, and live happily ever after... I will be ecstatically happy for them 

Of course someone could meet right away, and get married right away, and have success.  Utopiacowboy is an example of this.  If I were to dig into my notes, I could find 1-3 other guys (they were friends of each other, one of them used to post) who had similar instant success.  However these stories are the exception, not the rule.

A great, lighthearted, hilarious example of this is the movie "Heartbreak Kid" with Ben Stiller.  He falls in love and has a whirlwind romance with a girl, and is encouraged by his father and best friend to marry her quickly before she leaves the country on a work assignment.  During their honeymoon in Cancun, he starts finding out all kinds of things that he never knew about her that would've definitely made him think twice before marrying her.  Subject matter aside, definitely one of the funniest movies I have ever seen