Cali Trip

[Zon]

I did not go wife shopping. I went to Cali to see what all the fuss was about. 

I was invited by a friend who is wants to start an agency in Cali.  He has connections.  I helped him photograph and video over 60 ladies that were responding to newspaper ads.  Of those 6 ladies, 3 were in my league.  Of those three, only one had the educational background I would prefer.  Two were very attractive.  One was very attractive, but seemed a little too wild for serious consideration.  AND I AM NOT THE SLIGHTEST BIT DISAPPOINTED.

I tested the limits of this city.  Although I was fortunate to have an armed guide by my side, I behaved much the same way I do in Manhattan or Miami - which is tastefully loud. (I would not have done this if it were not for my security.  Very clearly Cali is a place where a Gringo ought to be very aware).

I found the culture attractive. I found the women to be more than what we deserve.  I am looking forward to visiting Bogotá in a couple of weeks.  My Spanish improved greatly.

So much of this is a matter of what YOU give, not take.  I find the Spanish / Latin / Colombian culture to be "bridgeable"- meaning I am confident I can negotiate it and understand it in a short period of time. It seems like a better fit for me than Eastern Europe (although I am in New York City now and I have spent time with remarkable Romanian ladies that are very intelligent and industrious.)

I have learned to kiss age gaps good bye. I look very young for my age.  I look 32 at best.  My actual age is 44.  Over the last 3 months, I have probably dated more 19 year olds han 26 year olds.  The ladies are so simple, I hardly see a difference in age ( I mean nothing consenting  in the term simple).

I have seen enough beauty and enough purity to sa y that Colombia deserves a much closer look. I believe a man should not do a drive bye and decide who to marry.  Accordingly, I am testing the culture to see if there is a longer term fit for me - I think there is.  I am in no hurry.  There are plenty of bone crushingly attractive women that are eager to know me.  Much better then US.  But I don't let myself be affected by this.  God made many pretty girls.  I am over it.  I am looking for the best for me.  I think that will take time.  (In order for me to take all this totally seriously, I am going to have to communicate very well in Spanish.   It seems unlikely for the language barrier to be resolved by the women).

This board seems week in traffic.  I would love other recommendations so I can be very prepared.  Any ideas? 

Conclusions from Cali:
1, tons of pretty girls
2, Girls are a little simple (although there are notable exceptions)
3, Cali seems like it could get dangerous fast.  Must have good guide and Spanish.
4, Currency exchange only a little favorable to the US Dollar
5, Not a tourist destination
6, better learn to Salsa!

I am planning on returning to Cali very soon. I would like to explore Bogata, Medellin; and Cartegena too.  I foudn the Colombian people friendly - easy to network.  Would love to learn more about the truth behind the FARC (where are they, how many are they ... I am sure they are looking for my white ass)  Would love to meet educated girls not so desperate.

I am excited by what I have found.  I have a GREAT guide in Cali if any one is interested.

ZZ

[utopiacowboy]

Interesting observations. You're right. There are so many attractive women that after a while, you get a little blase about them. Another knockout, um, ok, so what's next?

I hope you're not serious about the FARC looking for you. That's not to say that something couldn't happen to you. It could but it would be more a question of bad luck (wrong place at the wrong time) combined with not having your wits or a local with you. I tend to spend my time in Colombia in the heartland of the AUC (Cordoba and Sucre) so the FARC don't concern me. Nevertheless, as you say things can get dangerous fast.

[Zon]

And I did leave out some important characteristics of the people and women:

1,  I found ALL the women genuinely responsive, curious ... available. That is all one can ask for.
2, I have been in Latin cultures out side the US much over the last year.  But I found some Colombian women  - physically -  to be more European looking. That is a big plus for me.
3, Most of the Colombian people I met, ran into, were very friendly and helpful.
4, The Colombian women (and other Latin women too) truly use a different lense to see a man than American women.  Success, intelligence, loyalty, optimism, stability - these are the things they prize most. 

I think agencies are very useful for those with limited time.  But they are not necessary for those who have more time.

Again, contrasting the Colombian women to the Eastern European woman (those that may be open to marriage and relocation to the US), the Eastern European woman seems to TRY HARDER.  They seem to be more ambitious, energetic, concerned about trading for a better life.  The Colombian woman seems to be more natural and simple, more grounded in human qualities.  So, an email exchange and a meeting with a Russian woman many feel like Fire works - a love affair placed on high temperature.  I have found that the ladies I dated in Colombia were much more laid back and less urgent.

That is all for now.

[Alabamaboy!]

I have been to Cali two different times.  I had a blast both times.  I met some very nice people there....women....and the people in the streets in general.  I stayed at Cali Plaza Hotel....and the owner is an American guy from Tennessee I think.  His name is Claude.  He had alot of great information about Cali.  And it seemed like his hotel was filled with guys like me....single guys from the US or Europe.  So it was a great place to set up base and compare notes about anything happening in Cali.

I did not see any crime whatsoever in Cali......nothing. And I was out at all times of the day and night....by myself many times.

I highly recommend that you also check out Cartagena.....you do not even need an agency there...just start talking to any girl you see in the stores...anywhere.  And Barranquilla.....although the city is not so great or interesting....there are tons of beautiful women there.

[soltero]

Your observations are pretty normal for a first timer. Your interest in the FARC and who might be hiding in wait for you are also normal for those that worry about that sort of thing. It will probably dissipate as you spend more time there. Really, when your time is up then your time is up, and by some evolutionary quirk, you are prone to accelerating that, then by all means, protect yourself how you see fit. I am sure as you spend more time there, you may loosen up and lose your fear.

The women are in fact very beautiful. Your constant comparisons to Russian women do them a disservice as one should be more interested in finding exactly what he wants instead of settling. I have never understood why a man would be so keen on one type of woman and exalt her while never getting off his hind quarters and going to find her. It makes the guy appear less in my opinion. I am interested in your comparisons, however, as they tend to shine more light on you and illuminate certain shortcomings that play into your personality and explain why you tend to express yourself the way that you do.

As far as the simplicity of the women, that might improve once you get over dating the children. The younger you go, the simpler the woman. Hopefully, you won't explore the age differences to their fullest that are available to you there and you have some personal restraint. I am sure that if you don't get caught up in the fact that you are able to go much younger there than here (so some would think), that you will begin to make connections and actually meet some of the women that would challenge you. They are there, but for all of your talk of European culture and wit, I still can't fathom why you would want something else if it is less than what you desire. Hopefully, one of these days, you will either type enough to explain this or you may come across something clinical that relates to this issue and be able to share it with us.

We all understand by now that you aren't looking for a wife, but if one should happen to fall out of a coconut tree complete with tiara and 2 or 3 degrees and a polished background, you would be willing to consider her as marriage material, but only if her nose was slightly different, or she was slightly taller...

Thanks for the report, and I am sure we are all looking for more insight into how to not look for a wife while pretty much actively looking for a wife that doesn't nor will ever exist...

[blockbuster]

I found the culture attractive. I found the women to be more than what we deserve.  I am looking forward to visiting

I have learned to kiss age gaps good bye. I look very young for my age.  I look 32 at best.  My actual age is 44.  Over the last 3 months, I have probably dated more 19 year olds han 26 year olds.  The ladies are so simple, I hardly see a difference in age ( I mean nothing consenting  in the term simple).

 32 at best? Ok, not to insult but I work with guys in their early 30's. They look young. At best you look to be in your late 30's. Understand one thing. People will generally tell you that you look 5 + years younger than they THINK you are. ESPECIALLY if you ask "How old do you think I AM"? Which is a question often asked by people who think they look young. Mostly being fat or short will make people think someone younger.So we all think we look young for our age. FW are horrible at guessing age. I"ve been told I look mid to late 30's but I know most of it is BS and courtesy.

[dennislevy]

Rivardco:

Thank you for the trip report.

If you spend part of your time chatting up 19 year olds, its obvious you are not looking for a wife!

But, when you're ready, come to Bogota, bring your A game Spanish  and start meeting 30 years old and highly educated professional women. Your impressions will be much, much,  different.

BTW, if you do not mind me asking, was Walter Mora your guide in Cali?

Take care.

dennislevy

[singlefather no more]

Soltero,

I give him a big credit for being upfront and honest that he is not looking for a wife right now and wants to play the field.. I have big problem with guys that go to South America telling the women they are looking for a wife when in fact they just want to get laid..

If you are upfront and honest with a woman then all the power to you..

If I remember correctly he has been free for only a few years from his ex AW , so of course he wants to have some fun.. I think in life and love we have to find out what we are looking for before we can be successful or find it..

Rivardco,

I hope you find what you are looking for and the woman that makes you happy one of these days..

All the best,

singlefather


.

[soltero]

Soltero,

I give him a big credit for being upfront and honest that he is not looking for a wife right now and wants to play the field.. I have big problem with guys that go to South America telling the women they are looking for a wife when in fact they just want to get laid..

If you are upfront and honest with a woman then all the power to you..

If I remember correctly he has been free for only a few years from his ex AW , so of course he wants to have some fun.. I think in life and love we have to find out what we are looking for before we can be successful or find it..

Rivardco,

I hope you find what you are looking for and the woman that makes you happy one of these days..

All the best,

singlefather


.

SF,

I would give him the same amount of credit as I abhor game players and liars as people who waste other's valuable time. However, we aren't Latinas, and I have heard it before enough times to remember it. I guess if you post on a board dedicated to people who ARE looking for wives and girlfriends, then you may need to separate yourself from them since you obviously haven't found people you can converse with who aren't. Either that, or he believes us to be as simple as the teenage Calenas he has been wining and dining.

I guess the "I want to look around for women who may be wife material, but I am to cheap and scared to venture out far enough to find the women I am really interested in, so whoever I might meet that may be a good enough substitute for my Russian fantasy women" forums must be closed right now. Maybe if someone can move the former USSR closer to the U.S so he can get to it without breaking the bank might make him change his mind on how much of  a wife hunter he is....

[bcc_1_2]

32 at best? Ok, not to insult but I work with guys in their early 30's. They look young. At best you look to be in your late 30's. Understand one thing. People will generally tell you that you look 5 + years younger than they THINK you are. ESPECIALLY if you ask "How old do you think I AM"? Which is a question often asked by people who think they look young. Mostly being fat or short will make people think someone younger.So we all think we look young for our age. FW are horrible at guessing age. I"ve been told I look mid to late 30's but I know most of it is BS and courtesy.

i've mostly just trolled this site for info this summer as a i plan my trip but i had to chirp in here. I dont know blockbuster, but he's being straight with you. Coming from a guy who is in his mid 20s. you don't look 32. i'm sure you are a cool guy with plent of women interested in you, but if you think you are walking into places with women thinking you are in your early 30s- think again. I say date who you want to date, but I'm looking at girls in their early 20s myself. Hopefully in college or graduating and you are talking about dating 19 year olds. No judgement on my part- other than an honest evaluation of you not being 32. Just something to chew on a little.

[fathertime]

rivard,  i find it very strange that you had an armed guard with you in cali...tastefully loud...what does that mean...i bet you look a lot closer to 44 than 32...i don't understand why people think they look so much younger than they are...from my experience, most of the time they are mistaken...you can 'kiss age gaps goodbye' but most women will not, at least not for too long...i can't relate 19 year olds on any level...except for in the sack!

fathertime!

[Zon]

This is a small little group ... I take no injury from criticisms.  Similarly, I take no joy in compliments. This board serves a very limited purpose - to fill in the blanks, and I am thankful for the good it has done for me.

As far as me, I choose to be totally honest with myself and others.  Please do not read my comments as "NOT Shopping for a wife"  meaning not interested in finding a woman with whom to create a serious relationship.   In practice, I am a gentleman, selective, and well mannered.  I admit that I am more selective than I rightly deserve to be. Begin aware is half the solution (the other half continues to evade me). If I found a 32 year female professional that would have been perfect. I did not.  I played the cards that were presented to me in the 6 days I had.  I did find favor with younger women.  That does not define me.

As far as concern of crime and security ... it is a fact.  Especially, for those who would LIKE to go, but never quite get beyond the US State Department's web page.  It is fair to say that - especially if you know no Spanish - things can go sideways fast.  It is also fair to say that as long as one stays in modern and secure zones, in big cities, the danger is not greater or less than in the bad parts of Brooklyn. 

No, my guide was not - Walter Mora.  (I did not intend to exaggerate, or romanticize my report. I wanted to keep it flat and relevant).   

[bcc_1_2]

This is a small little group ... I take no injury from criticisms.  Similarly, I take no joy in compliments. This board serves a very limited purpose - to fill in the blanks, and I am thankful for the good it has done for me.

Ok, lets fill in the blanks. A 19 year old girl might be trying to take _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ of you.
Would you like to buy a vowel or solve the puzzle?

In all seriousness I looked over at Jamie's agency and he has a lot of smokin' women in their late 20s and early 30s.

I think the rest of the guys are like me in only getting on your age comment because you mentioned seeing 19 year olds. If you are just dating them then hey have fun. But if you ever even think about getting serious with a 19 year old girl I'd come back and start posting on this board before you do it so some guys can set you straight. BTW, this isn't an attack on anyone's relationship (so nobody reading this should feel singled out) but if you are 44 and dating a 19 year old you've got her by 25 years. Eventually most women's biological clocks start ticking so if you plan on staying with them you've got to have a kid with them. So when she's 25 that would make you 50. By that time she is ready for a kid- then eventually the kid is 5 or 6 and the family goes to the park and everyone is going to be asking Grandpa and his daughter the name of the cute kid.

On the other hand I saw a lot of cute women in their late 20s and early 30s that have already had children (or maybe even some that don't want any at all??). Maybe hit up Jamie's and that 32 year old professional that would have been perfect will be found.

[Zon]

Yea I know... AND TOTALLY AGREE!  19 (hell, let's not forget 18)  is too young for a serious relationship.  Too young for anything buy fun. But that goes both ways.

I confess! I have been spending too much time with very young (and sexy) girls 18 - 24.  But it is not because I am lurking for them.  I hang out in tourist destinations in the DR.  We are attracted to each other. Many of the too young girls I date are tourist girls from Spain, Italy, Russia, etc.. I do not lie, or mislead.  They enjoy my company. I enjoy their's. That is it for now. 

(There is a girl I see in the DR.  Her name is Ruby and she is ONLY 18 - BTW she lied and told me that she was 22 when we first met.  One morning we were having breakfast with a friend of mine from Argentina.  He said, "this girl is just wanting a green card.  I said, not true.  Not in this case.  We like each other for real - but there are limits and nothing more.  He asked her in perfect Spanish why she was hanging out with an guy my age. She answered simply and - I have come to learn honestly - "It happens.  He has a young heart. He is my love."   I share this little story simple to show it IS possible for simple relationships to have larger than normal age gaps.  I know many men in the DR that have wives 20+ years their junior.  I AM NOT ADVOCATING.  Just sharing)

And if one does commit to a long term relationship with a significantly younger partner - then the pressure is on!  I can pull off large age gap today (not bragging, just sharing). But what about 10 - 15 years from now?!?!? 

We all are enjoying a "trade-up" one way or another by this pursuit. I try to be responsible and honest through the process.

ALSO, about danger. I don't think a guy would be in the slightest danger if he just went to the Intercontenental or Sharaton and stayed in the well trafficked areas.  When I mentioned that I looked around ... I LOOKED AROUND.  Over the bridge late night roads and clubs.  The kind of stuff that is more risky that sixth ave and the Chipechape mall.


 now.  Life is a series of chapters and phases.  I would love to meet older women. I am just evidentially not trying very hard. 

Which is true.

Now, that I understand the place a little more ... I am more open to using an agency for serious consideration.  What is Jamie's agency?  I could go back and research.

[dennislevy]

Rivardco:

Jamie's agency in Baranquilla is International introductions. His web site is http://www.latin-wife.com

and he actually has women in agency who are older then 19!!!!

Imagine that!

.
Another poster, puregringo recetnly wrote a trip report about his experiences at Jamie's agency, might make for good reading.   

have a good day!

dennislevy

   

[singlefather no more]

rivardco,

The best agency in South America is run by Jamie in Barranquilla , Colombia in my humble opinion called International Introductions..

http://www.latin-wife.com/

sean126 , looking4wife , drm , zack and a number of other guys have found great wives at Jamie's..

raycjs met his Novia there and they are getting married soon here in the USA..

I would start a thread asking questions about his agency and you will be amazed by all of the positive feedback you will get about his agency..

singlefather

..