Conflict Resolution

[slojas1]

What methods are you guy using to deal with conflicts as they arise in your relationships? We believe in attacking the problem and not the person. Attacking an individual erodes the very foundation of the relationship and if done enough  nothing will be left. Problems are bound to crop up, having something in mind helps to minimize angry outbursts which are purely emotional and serve no good purpose.
We also believe in making sure the words we use during conflicts are well 'seasoned' because you never know when you will have to eat those same words. Choosing words carefully rank right up there in settling disputes.

[singlefather no more]

slojas,

My friend great threads you start as usual..

Misunderstanding can and do happen especially when you are many thousands of miles apart.. My Novia and I have had our misunderstanding and disagreements.. It usually because one of us did not understand the other person...

One thing that has worked for us is that we made a solemn promise to each other to never ever go to bed mad or upset at each other. We stay up talking ,webcaming and chatting and online MSN till we get it settled..

If there is a problem or misunderstanding or miscommunication because of our different languages ( this never happens of course. lol) we deal with it..

Take care,

singlefather

..

[slojas1]

That is a good strategy my friend. Don't let the sun set with you in a provoked state. That is a powerful strategy in attacking problems. Most couples lose it when they begin to attack each other trying to hurt the other person. Some are quite good at it. C'mon guys, there has to be some more good advice out there.

[jm21-2]

I read an article a while back where the author advised that not going to bed angry can actually cause more problems sometimes. By pressing the issue and getting it resolved right then, tempers might flare up and it could escalate into a fight (or a bigger fight if it's already a fight). Getting some sleep and discussing it when you're calmer in the morning or the next evening might be better in some cases.

Just thought I'd throw that out...it was an interesting perspective I hadn't heard before.