Tell us how you met your Novia & or Wife! How is it going now?

[singlefather no more]

Hello everyone,

I would like to invite everyone that has had a successful or not so successful relationship with a Latina to tell us their story..

raycjs deserves a lot of the credit for coming up with the original idea for this thread..

1) Tell us how you met your Novia & or Wife! How is it going now?

2) How long have you been together?

3) How old are you and how old is she?

4) What has been the hardest thing to get used to in your relationship?

5) What has surprised you?

6) What has disappointed you?

7) Would you marry her or get involved again if you could do it all over again?

Did she have and still have the values you were looking for?

9) How would you compare your special Latina vs. a American woman now?

10) What mistakes did you make in your search that you would now not repeat with your experience you have?

11) What advice would you give to newbie’s?

12) How did the “kid in the candy store feeling” affect the choice of your Latina woman you are with now ?

Guys if you have any questions to add to the list , jump in and post or hijack… All posts are welcome..

Thanks in advance for all the guys for sharing your info and experience!!

singlefather

[william3rd]

this one thread deserves at least a dozen separate threads. Very good questions to answer here.

[soltero]

1) Tell us how you met your Novia & or Wife! How is it going now?

2) How long have you been together?

3) How old are you and how old is she?

4) What has been the hardest thing to get used to in your relationship?

5) What has surprised you?

6) What has disappointed you?

7) Would you marry her or get involved again if you could do it all over again?

Did she have and still have the values you were looking for?

9) How would you compare your special Latina vs. a American woman now?

10) What mistakes did you make in your search that you would now not repeat with your experience you have?

11) What advice would you give to newbie’s?

12) How did the “kid in the candy store feeling” affect the choice of your Latina woman you are with now ?

I'll bite...

1) I met my girl while I was spending three months in Cali at Pete's. I saw her on the CaliVIP website and she was one of two people there I was interested in. At the time, they did not have a per sita rate, so I paid the $20 for a phone call and they wanted me to come to their office which was on the south side of town and they would call her and hand me the phone. I told them that it could be easier than that, as they had tried multiple times to get her and couldn't, so I did not feel like going to the other side of town and waiting for however long if they could not get in touch with her. I gave them my number and told them if she was interested, she could call me. She did, and we talked for about an hour and a half that first time. She was very busy and lived about an hour's cab ride away, so we didn't see much of each other at first, and I was still dating other people. We didn't get serious until I was back home and had broken it off with someone else I was seeing. We started out just being friends and it was at least 3 months of daily conversations before we began to entertain the idea of becoming novios.

2) It will be 3 years by the time she should be here in June (hopefully)

3) I just turned 41 last month and she will be 28 in February.

4) Having someone I can actually trust who seems to have my best interests at heart.

5) Same as #4

6) The waiting for her to get here seems to be taking forever.

7) Yes, and wish I had met her YEARS ago.

All of them and then some.

9) No comparison. She is miles above and beyond every woman I have ever dated. The only ones that come distantly second and third were a Chicana and Boricua that were both born here.

10) I wasted way to much time with jobless women (women who weren't doing anything). I originally did it because they had the most time to spend when I would be there. I had to bite the bullet and invest some real time to meet my girl.

11) First, work out your own issues. Take the time to know what you truly want and need before jumping into this. Go and learn about the culture and practice the language before you try looking for a wife. I am not saying don't date, but make sure you are ready before actually knuckling down and trying to find a wife. Make friends and meet people and let it flow naturally. You might find her sooner than later, but go with the mindset of taking your time and doing it right. It's not like picking a puppy.

12) I abused it and grew out of it before I met my girl. Once it wore off, I was able to make a great decision.

[singlefather no more]

Everyone feel free to post,

Guys it does not matter if she is Latina, Asian or
Russian or any other ethnic persuasion..

Fill us in oh great ones... We who hope to follow
in your footsteps wait to here your wisdom spill
from your mind... lol lol

singlefather

[singlefather no more]

Great post Soltero,

Wow that was a very honest and from the heart post..
Thanks for sharing.. I learned something there.. Try to
overcome the kid and the candy store affect..

I will not date anyone younger then 28.. I will not date anyone..
BS to myself..., now I see the problem.. What hot blooded American or Canadian male is going to turn down the looks and attention from a hot younger girl...

Well cold showers maybe and plan the plan and work the plan.. It works good is business but I guess we have to keep the eye on our goal and prize...

Okay guys another couple of questions..

13) Are you happy and still in love ?

14) After a few years is the passion still there from her for you..(other words is she different from a AW and still wants nookie years later and does not have a headache). lol .. feel free not answer this one as it is personal..

singlefather

[utopiacowboy]

1) Tell us how you met your Novia & or Wife! How is it going now?

I saw her profile among the new profiles on amigos.com when I was looking for Mexicanas that lived nearby. It's going very well.

2) How long have you been together?

We've been married a little over 4 years.

3) How old are you and how old is she?

I am 53 and she is 47.

4) What has been the hardest thing to get used to in your relationship?

The hardest thing to get used to is how easy our relationship is. You always expect there to be some rough spots but s far there haven't been any. It's a little strange.

5) What has surprised you?

I thought that my passion for her would wear off but it hasn't. I am still crazy about her.

6) What has disappointed you?

The only thing and it's not a big deal since my Spanish is fairly good is her failure to learn English.

7) Would you marry her or get involved again if you could do it all over again?

Oh hell yeah.

Did she have and still have the values you were looking for?

Yes. I married her when she was 43 and she wasn't about to change at that age.

9) How would you compare your special Latina vs. a American woman now?

Women are women but there is something about a Latina. She can really enjoy the moment and enjoy being a woman like no one else.

10) What mistakes did you make in your search that you would now not repeat with your experience you have?

I was involved with a Mexicana who was a lot like my first wife. Luckily I was able to step back and see that I was repeating a pattern. So I didn't make the same mistake twice.

11) What advice would you give to newbie’s?

Follow your heart and be true to yourself. And like Ronald Reagan used to say, "Trust but verify."

12) How did the “kid in the candy store feeling” affect the choice of your Latina woman you are with now ?

There are tons of hot women in Colombia but when I'm with my wife the whole world could disappear. You pick the right woman and nothing else matters.

13) Are you happy and still in love ?

Oh yes, it is quite mutual.

14) After a few years is the passion still there from her for you.

Yes, indeed. She NEVER has a headache.

[valleydude]

(1) Latin American Cupid and going well.

(2) Next week, 1 year (married 7 months).

(3) 40-30

(4) Reassuring her and keeping her positive that this distance will soon pass.

(5) That she is so cool. My wife is not only sexy and fun, but a super cool girl too! I look at her and think to myself: "I really enjoy this woman."

(6) In the true sense of the word, nothing.

(7) Yeah

(8 ) Yes, but I do keep her in check sometimes. I think she tries to test me occasionally, but I react just in the sense of keeping her in line. We got married kind of quick, so I think there is a natural instinct for her to still test the waters. For example: I could care less if she takes a couple of extra bucks from the ATM, but I let her know that I know. She never tries to pull a fast one, it's just that whole woman thing and testing their limits.

(9) I don't think there can be a comparison. American women are like men. I did not realize this until after I made a couple of trips. In the past I used to say, "I don't have problems with AW" ... Now, I do. jaja After while it sinks in, and you realize what God meant when he created woman. These girls are so ultra feminine, and they have no problems with it.

(10) Know when to cut bait.

(11) See 10.

(12) I didn't really have this.

(13) Yeah, it's actually gotten better.

(14) N/A

[singlefather no more]

Thank you UtopiaCowboy and Valleydude for sharing...

It is encouraging and heart warming to here about your happiness.

Guys if you have stories that are not happy ending or bad experiences please share them with us..

singlefather

[Jeff S]

I was introduced to my wife by mutual friends. We were both in our mid 30s, me having never been married, she having had an arranged marriage fall apart when she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law, who they lived with. We dated long distance for several years, she two trips here and me three trips there. She spoke not a word of English when we met and my Japanese was limited to ordering food, finding the bathroom and exchanging pleasantries.

We were married in a Shinto ceremony in Yokohama. That was 21 years ago. After a little bit of a rocky start we adapted to each other and things have just been getting better every year that passes. I'd like to say we were lucky, but is wasn't luck, it was effort. Love is something you do, every day, not something you find or fall into. Both partners have to understand that and be willing to put in the effort to create the kind of great partnership that lasts, IMO.

- Jeff

[singlefather no more]

Great post Jeff,

These are real words of wisdom below that Jeff S wrote...

"I'd like to say we were lucky, but is wasn't luck, it was effort. Love is something you do, every day, not something you find or fall into. Both partners have to understand that and be willing to put in the effort to create the kind of great partnership that lasts, IMO."

Thanks Jeff,

singlefather

[Patrick]

2) How long have you been together?

>10 yrs

3) How old are you and how old is she?

48/45

4) What has been the hardest thing to get used to in your relationship?

Being married!

5) What has surprised you?

Life

6) What has disappointed you?

Lack of complete assimilation is my only complaint.  But then I specifically married a Latina, not an American woman.

7) Would you marry her or get involved again if you could do it all over again?

A resounding "hell yes" on this one.  In fact, I never seriously dated an American woman after I met and dated a Mexican woman 15/16 years ago.  If I were single today, I probably wouldn't date an AM.

Did she have and still have the values you were looking for?

Yes

9) How would you compare your special Latina vs. a American woman now?

I wouldn't.  Every woman is unique.

10) What mistakes did you make in your search that you would now not repeat with your experience you have?

Not verifying age before visiting.  The first woman I traveled to meet was ten years older than her personal ad said.  She made no attempt to mislead me and told me her age when I asked after meeting her, but there's a big difference between 29 & 39 when it comes to having kids.

11) What advice would you give to newbie’s?

Unfortunately, you can't tell somebody to be smart and have common sense.  A modicum of people skills doesn't hurt either.  Basically, be realistic, be skeptical, "work" at it, and go slow.

Things were different back when I was searching.  There weren't many "full service" agencies and little information available (like at this forum!) and I really didn't want any interaction with them anyway.  I preferred to be as independent as possible (I took 15 units of Spanish before/during my search, so I didn't need hand-holding).  That's why I used correspondence (snail mail!).

12) How did the “kid in the candy store feeling” affect the choice of your Latina woman you are with now ?

I went through the kid in the candy store syndrome after my divorce at around age 30 with AMs.  By the time I went South looking for a potential wife, I was pretty much over it and looking for a quality relationship rather than a hot piece of ass.

[singlefather no more]

Thanks for the reply and great post Patrick.. There was some very interesting nuggets of advice in your post..

singlefather

[singlefather no more]

Hey Guys,

Here is a rookie question ?

When I am responding to a post and quoting a poster how do I put the quote in quotes properly and in the blue shade ?

Thanks,

singlefather

[soltero]

Hey Guys,

Here is a rookie question ?

When I am responding to a post and quoting a poster how do I put the quote in quotes properly and in the blue shade ?

Thanks,

singlefather

Click the "quote" button in the right hand corner of your post.

[blockbuster]

 Looks like the men marrying without large age gaps(20+) AND women who are older than 25 have more success.

[raycjs]

guy's i am going to jump here and tell you little about my story. i have been talking to a 26 year old women from Barranquilla with a 2 years old daughter. i have 2 girls of my own i am a single father and my girls live with me full time. for the past 5 weeks i was talking to this girl every day. i decided to go for it and make a trip to Barranquilla Colombia. i meet 40 to 50 women there and i went out on 12 to 15 one on one dates.(no sex) i then went on my first one on one date with the girl i have been talking to for the past 5 weeks. we had the time of our lives and just hit it off. so i told her i wanted to see her again and we went out for the next few days. i left there last week and we have been talking via phone 2 times a day and on msn all day. i am planing on going back to see her again in 2 weeks to spend the new year with her. she is 26 i am 45 we get along so great she does not act like she is 26 but she looks 25. she calls me more then i call her.  She  purchased gifts for my girls for me to take home. she had me meet her 3 best friends for dinner and did not let me pay she is smart and has a great job. i think i am hooked??? what do you think guy's 26-45?

[fathertime]

i think i am hooked??? what do you think guy's 26-45?

   I think there are SOME women that are ok with that age gap.  You look young in your avatar.  It could very easily be real.  If you decide she is what you want, then go for it! 

Fathertime!

[raycjs]

Fathertime

Thanks i do look younger many of the girls i meet in colombia thought i was 35 to 38 years old. We all look at things different i have been telling her that here in the US they will look at her as a gold digger. i have said everyhting i can to tell her that this will not be easy be she is so nice and all she wants is for her and i with our children to be happy. so i will take it slow and keep you all up to date. i want to thank all of you and you know who you are  the ones i  have been speeking with over the past 4 to 5 months. thank you again

Ray

[Researcher]

1) Tell us how you met your Novia & or Wife! How is it going now?
    - I met her through an agency in Bogota. Its going great now.
2) How long have you been together?
   - We will have been together 1 year next month.Married since august.
3) How old are you and how old is she?
     - I'm 42 and she is 33.
4) What has been the hardest thing to get used to in your relationship?
    -Nothing yet.
5) What has surprised you?
    -That a woman like this exists.
6) What has disappointed you?
    -nothing yet.
7) Would you marry her or get involved again if you could do it all over again?
    -Yes
 Did she have and still have the values you were looking for?
      -Yes, and then some.
9) How would you compare your special Latina vs. a American woman now?
      -AWs are definitely self absorbed for the most part.
10) What mistakes did you make in your search that you would now not repeat with your experience you have?
       -I probably spent too much time on a few women that weren't serious about a relationship.Later, I learned that if a woman wasn't serious or what I wasn't looking for,I didn't hesitate to move on.
11) What advice would you give to newbie’s?
      -Think about what you want in a woman and then go for it.This forum is a great place for advice and info, but just come up with a plan and do it.
12) How did the “kid in the candy store feeling” affect the choice of your Latina woman you are with now ?
       -I did experience this feeling about 10 years ago and I did get over it.Someone told me the same thing Soltero said "its not like picking out a puppy"(great post btw Soltero) and I realized that if I wanted to find a good woman I needed to focus on that...I'm glad I did.
     

[singlefather no more]

raycjs,

I think you are doing great.. You have your screwed on and your priorities are in place. You are taking it one step at a time.. You have your eyes wide open and you deserve happiness..

Many people may try to criticize you about your choice because of the age gap.. You have to listen to your own gut instinct , your mind and your heart.. Keep your ears and eyes wide open..Which I think you are doing all of the above.. You are a great guy and young looking so I think you will do well..

Nothing in life has a guarantee but you have to go for what you want in a relationship and a wife...We have only one life so enjoy it well you can...

singlefather

[catz]

  You look young in your avatar.

Isn't that David Spade in the avatar?

[singlefather no more]

catz,

lmao.. I was just about to say the same thing..
I think that is fathertime great sense of humor..

I have seen a picture of raycjs and his gf so I do
know he looks young..

singlefather

[Researcher]

what do you think guy's 26-45?

    When I was looking I didn't let a woman's age keep me keep me from getting to know her.Although I was wary of the ones 18 to about 25 because I believe they would be more apt to change as they got older.I also believe that the olders ones seem to know what they want out of life.But there are exceptions to just about everything.At this point, I'd just spend more time getting to know her.   

[raycjs]

yes it is David Spade i will post a picture of me and my girl after i get back from my 2nd trip. guy's thanks for all the advice. i do agree that the younger one's may be real but just do not know what real is yet. but i feel that a 25 plus women with a baby is searching for something else. I feel if i am willing to take a 25 plus and her child into my life i feel i have a greater chance of her not leaving me after her visa. Because even in the US guys do not always want a women with a child. She will also need to find someone to watch and care for her child while she works and tries to support herself. I could be wrong? who knows Thats why we all talk and help each other with advice.  thank you again you guy's are all great.

Ray

[jm21-2]

I suppose it depends on the part of the US, but I've yet to see a guy with no kids, especially a younger guy, willing to marry a girl with kids. Date her, sure...maybe for a long time...but that final step...?

I would say a girl who is 26 and with a kid is probably a world apart from her childless peers as far as maturity goes, in America. Judging from what people have said of Colombia, the difference would be even greater there. If you really feel you two are hitting it off, I'd go for it...just take it slow.