Why so many young women in Philippines looking for old men?

[klz002]

I've been browsing the various international dating sites, seeing what sort of women would be willing to take up with me.  (I'm 50 years old, more or less, and I'm NOT rich.)  I've looked at Russia, Ukraine, Thailand, China, and in those countries there would be some ladies in their mid-twenties who claimed to accept anyone, but most preferred someone younger.  And so I thought I should limit myself to women 30+ years of age, until I did a search for young women on www.blossoms.com.

Just limiting myself to women in their early twenties, I got back more than a thousand ladies, most of whom would accept someone in their 50's or even 60's!  Why is that?

[Ray]

Just limiting myself to women in their early twenties, I got back more than a thousand ladies, most of whom would accept someone in their 50's or even 60's!  Why is that?

You can figure that around 998 of that thousand are likely Green Card sharks.

I think your original thought to set a limit of 30+ was a good idea. Sure, you can always find a girl in her early 20’s or even an 18-year-old who will marry you, but your odds of a “successful marriage” will be severely diminished.

Unless you are willing to risk everything for a year or two of living a fantasy with a young hottie, I would recommend you use the following tried and true formula for computing the minimum age of your bride and limit your search in the range above that.

Her Age = (Your Age / 2) + 7

[Humabdos]

Why is that?

That's easy all they have to do is hang around a few years till you croak and they get all your stuff and their citizenship. The older the better. I've seen happen many times.
hum

[Jeff S]

A number of guys on this forum in their 60s and even 70s have met and married 20s and even teenaged women from the PI. Some have been very successful, some not, others, well the results aren't in yet.

The real question is why would you, a 50ish man, want to hook up with a 20something woman? You must know your chances of success in your marriage are greatly reduced. Go to your local mall or somewhere where 20something girls hang out and imagine what life would be like with one of them. Is that REALLY what you're looking for? Don't imagine that foreign ladies are somehow so drastically more mature than American ones - they aren't. What is it that a 22 year old has to offer to a 50 year old guy that a 35 year old doesn't? except perhaps that she can have a a dozen or so kids instead of one or two.

- Jeff

[Beattledog]

You are most correct

Beattledog

[klz002]

Kinda what I figured.   I would also suspect some of them are prostitutes.  What is weird though is why only the Philippines?  Why aren't women from Thailand doing this too?

Anyway, as for MY MOTIVES: understand I am just starting this process.  It's ego gratifying to an old man like me to have a hot 20 year old express interest, as that is certainly something no young American girl would do!  Aside from that ..... yeah, there are a lot of negatives, not the least of which would be social acceptance here for the both of us.  Even if somehow she really wanted to be with an old bag, how would people my age and people her age treat her?  Would anyone accept her?  Would my parents?

I don't know; I question my own motives sometimes.  Maybe I'm the one who's emotionally immature?

By the way, http://www.elenasmodels.com/, (a Russian women site with a good reputation), will do a very expensvie private search for you, but they recommend a maximum 15 year age difference, and won't even consider more than 20 years without a lot more cash!

[Ray]

I would also suspect some of them are prostitutes.

Why would you think that? For the most part, these are real people, with real hopes and dreams. Unfortunately, they have very few opportunities in the Philippines. After busting her ass in college and finally earning her bachelor's degree, about the best most of the girls can hope for is maybe a low-paying job in a mall or department store. Even then, they may find themselves no longer eligible for their job if they marry or age past 25-27 years old. The best job opportunities for many of these women are in foreign countries as housemaids or nannies.

Marrying a much older man is not looked down upon in Filipino society to nearly the extent that it is in the West. And yes, many Filipina women even prefer older men as long as they treat them with dignity and respect. I can’t speak with any great authority on the motives or preferences of modern Thai women, but I have seen quite a few younger Thai ladies here in the U.S.A. married to much older American men. Perhaps the Thais just haven’t caught up with the concept of on-line dating as a means of finding a good foreign husband to the extent that the Filipinas have (?).

Ray

[Bear]

I married a woman 26 years younger than me and although I admit some problems there not the ones you would expect.  Honey has experienced things I never will because she is from a impoverished 3rd world country.  Most girls there have increditable points of view that AWs would puke to hear like, "When I get raped I hope he doesn't have bad body odor".  Not "I hope I never get raped" but "I hope he doesn't stink"!  (One of my wifes bridesmaids actually sais that!).  They deal with physical abuse, discrimination, starvation and hopelessness that comes without opportunity.  I doubt you can find a Filipina that hasn't worked 6 days a week 12 hrs a day by time they're 18 and give every single peny to mom/dad.  They don't see the "tall, dark and hansome rich man with rippling mussles" as realistic.  They see a mature man as someone who'll provide stability finacially and emotionally, less likely to cheat on them ("because how could he find so0meone younger and prettier than her") and less likely to be harsh with them and if he is she won't have to deal with it for long because he is older than her.  The number of men cheating on their wives in the R.P. is very high and divorce is near impossible to get.  Marrying an older man fits well into the above scenario.  I've even had a few hint that its easier to control a man sexualy with the age difference!?

The big difference I dealt with is the total lack of "relationship" experience.  They do not know how to deal with people in a one-on-one relationship, something our kids can do by the age of twelve.  Hence the reactions like "tampo" (temper-tantrum-silent treatment) where women are taught to not cause her husband problems so she just refuses to talk with him while providing "all" expected wifely services until he apologizes and does a little "lambing lambing".  To me they're like children throwing a tantrum rather than working out the differences in a mature manner.

Plus they have wacked loyalty concepts.  They'll marry a man promising to be loyal and honest while stealing everything he has to send to her parents/family etc. showing that they are more loyal to parents than husbands at least for a few years.

Many women become "ates" or an older sister/parent stand-in who is expected to stay at home and care for her parents in old their old age (read not married unless hes wealthy).  Their reward is eqaul footing with the parents.  They end up becoming "mistresses" in their later years because the men can get younger wives.

Their concept of hansome (gwapo), fat, young/old isn't in your dictionary and its not been any more difficult to deal wih a young Filipina over a same age AW.  All relationships have problems.  Communicate and don't be afraid to say what you mean - you'll find that they may not like what you say but they will respect you for it and for not confusing them and using them and for acting on your beliefs instead - they can readily accpet that.  They call it the "simple life"?  Or in english, "A man who'll spend all day making decissions in their favor so they don't have too".

Don't be surprised if they come to wedding bed without a clue whats going to happen.  When I asked my wife if she had discussed men/women relationships and sex with her mother she said (without hesitation) that her mother told her I'd tell her what I wanted.  Nothing else!  When I respnded with something perverted she calmly said "OK".  When I awoke from my nearl heart attack she responded with, "Why would you hurt me?".  Wonderful loving innocence and she was right, since I loved her I wouldn't but that doesn't mean there aren't a lot of guys out there that would.  Remember they don't know how to deal with people one-on-one (at least at first) so many guy take advantage of them leaving them alone and pregnant - particularly the younger guys who have no compassion for the hurt they causing.  Hence back to the older more mature guy.

If some AW or acquaintance wants to make a comment about your "young wife" I suggest getting out of her way and letting her deal with it.  They'll quickly learn that its is probably more her choice than yours.

The Bear family

[Jeff S]

Well, klz, sounds like you got some learning to do. I wish I could tell you where the archives are from the old board. There are 6 years or so of experiences, success stories, horror stories, sad stories and happy stories. It would take you a few hours of reading to get through, but you'd really have an understanding of the what this is all about when you were done. They supposedly imported the files but I don't know where to look. Anybody know where the archives are?

- Jeff