Author Topic: "La Madre" The Conclusion...and thoughts (Read 7340 times)

Santanger · « **on:** April 20, 2007, 04:44:20 PM »

I broke up with my novia over the weekend. I'm fine with it because i fully realize that from being on this website and seeing my "fellow hombres who have gone before" there's alot better out there and its just a matter of having patience and finding the right one but as to be expected she was quite upset.

The interesting thing is alot of things that she had kept hidden (for secondary gain) bubbled to the surface which was quite an eyeopener because MAN, AM I GLAD I LET HER GO!!!.

Problem is.... come Monday she is going to march right back into Jamie's Agency and say put my photo back up because this gold digging visa hunter is back on the prowl.......errr i mean sweet loving girl who wants to start a family and likes to travel.

This has probably been brought up before but we should have some kind of database of women under each section Latin, Asian, Russian who we should be made aware of because to be honest I pity the next gringo she is going to hook up with. LETS FACE IT. Alot of us and newbies will use the same agencies and will in all likelihood date the same girl (especially if she's a hottie and been listed on the agency for a while) but just like getting references from a job applicant it would be nice to have some prior knowledge on someone before spending 6 months, thousands of dollars, your hard earned time, effort and possibly heartache to glean this vital information ONLY TO LET IT GO TO WASTE. Worse case scenario is that you marry her bring her here and she cleans you out and takes half your assets. If it deters one potential divorce and possibly ruined life then i think it will have served its purpose. Granted there is a huge potential for abuse, slander etc, here by pissed off gringos...but if one person lists a review thats one thing and you can take it with a grain of salt ...but if 3 or 4 or 5 people say the same thing about the girl then HEY thats a different story. Perhaps the lawyers here can comment on the legality of this.

It could be useful for the agency owners on this site to get feedback and know whether they have sharks that are ruining their agency's reputation. Perhaps a list of the agenices and posted under each the women you should watch out for or avoid. Every time i read the trip reports it would be nice to know which girl you took out in that agency site or dated for several months was really sincere, a gold digger, or in my case has a completely dysfunctional family/mother in law. The PL list would probably be more updated than the agency websites themselves.

Just my thoughts......

bigstew33 · « **Reply #1 on:** April 20, 2007, 04:55:36 PM »

I would just let the agency owner know what is going on with her. Granted there are several agencies. I had a similar situation, but I found out today she went to another agency and told everyone how bad I was. Well fortunately my favorite translator in the world found this out and set the record straight. Now really I don't care since I have a girl now. I am concentrating on her. Even though Barranquilla has over 1.3 million people well, the dating and marrying gringos is a small world. They all know about you.

papi · « **Reply #2 on:** April 20, 2007, 05:04:58 PM »

the agencies main priority are the intros (besides helping separate you from your hard earned pesos). After that you are mostly on your own. Work the internet and then use the agencies for backup. Better luck with the next girl.

Planet-Love.com · « **Reply #2 on:** April 20, 2007, 05:04:58 PM »

sean126 · « **Reply #3 on:** April 20, 2007, 07:34:20 PM »

Santanger,

Sorry to hear that things didn't work out the way you hoped. It's good that you figured out she wasn't for you though.

Like bigstew suggested...I'd definitely tell Jamie your side of the story. I don't know what he'd do, but I think he would definitely want to know what happened. He struck me as that type of person.

Your right, patience and the ability to read someone is important when first dating someone for a while. I waited 37 years to get married and patience definitely has it's rewards.

Good luck in the future!!!!

Ricardo · « **Reply #4 on:** April 20, 2007, 07:41:33 PM »

Santanger,
You've made the right move. Regarding agency databases, I would think you'd have to make a fairly specific 'complaint' about this lady to get here on a 'watch list' or the like. Secondly, I really don't think a list will be 'deterrent' enough. Guys will learn from their mistakes, or alternately, from the mistakes of others. So this forum is most definitely I would say - 'required reading' for any guy who wants to make the most of his novia and wife search. There is such a variety of experiences here, that is, something to learn for everyone irrespective of prior experience, country where they're searching, age, purpose, etc.
Your experience with your novia proves that guys should put the novias to the test, whatever they need to do to test their (the novia's) intention, attitude, maturity, etc.
Good luck, you're on your way! thanks for sharing your experiences..
Ricardo

papi · « **Reply #5 on:** April 20, 2007, 08:11:34 PM »

Quote

Your experience with your novia proves that guys should put the novias to the test

do you have a battery of tests in mind? I think life is in part a risk. If you don't play you can't win. I am hoping mine lasts until at least I am in pampers...but who knows. I think CP has the right attitude.

michaelb · « **Reply #6 on:** April 20, 2007, 09:16:56 PM »

.but if 3 or 4 or 5 people say the same thing about the girl then HEY thats a different story.

What are the odds of 4 or 5 people from this board all dating the same woman long enough to have anything to say about her? I'd guess halfway between fat and slim.

papi · « **Reply #7 on:** April 20, 2007, 09:24:37 PM »

75% of agency hottie calenas are gold diggers...so what are you going to do? blacklist all of them?

TXAK · « **Reply #8 on:** April 21, 2007, 08:38:27 PM »

I've had the feeling lately that perhaps there was an outside Bulletin Board for some of these websites...a place where ladies can go and comment on some the men they speak to...

Just a feeling.

Den

william3rd · « **Reply #9 on:** April 21, 2007, 11:14:20 PM »

THere is one on the Russian side now. I think it is called anti-date.

doombug · « **Reply #10 on:** April 21, 2007, 11:42:37 PM »

Quote from: papi on April 20, 2007, 09:24:37 PM

75% of agency hottie calenas are gold diggers...so what are you going to do? blacklist all of them?

No.

You'd green list them.

curranti · « **Reply #11 on:** April 21, 2007, 11:50:44 PM »

Why would anyone get married to a girl you know for a grand total of a month (time together) or so without a pre nup?

For that matter a pre nup, post nup and partition agreement. If she signs, then she really does love you.

Nothing says I love you more than a pre-nup

utopiacowboy · « **Reply #12 on:** April 22, 2007, 12:04:47 AM »

I'm a lawyer but no pre-nup for me. I've been married for almost four years and I stand by my original decision. I wouldn't marry anyone with whom I felt that I needed to have a pre-nup.

Planet-Love.com · « **Reply #12 on:** April 22, 2007, 12:04:47 AM »

papi · « **Reply #13 on:** April 22, 2007, 08:31:18 AM »

i paid a lawyer the last time to draft a prenupt but never used it. I am not going to get one this time but might end up sending my novia to law school. In this event, I would feel better writing up some kind of post-marriage contract but I don't know if and how it can be done. comments?

jediknight · « **Reply #14 on:** April 22, 2007, 08:36:59 AM »

santanger, would you tell us what issues bubbled to the surface? what was wrong with her mother?
JK

jm21-2 · « **Reply #15 on:** April 22, 2007, 09:06:36 AM »

Quote from: papi on April 22, 2007, 08:31:18 AM

but might end up sending my novia to law school.

Exactly how much do you make? Law school is Fing expensive (26-40k/year tuition generally) and the other girls there might not be the best influence. Your choice I guess, but sounds like a treacherous path. I'm a law student and wouldn't send a girl to law school unless I was 100% sure of her. She will probably have problems with the LSAT as well, because she's speaking English as a foreign language and isn't used to the American way of thinking. Just some thoughts.

michaelb · « **Reply #16 on:** April 22, 2007, 09:40:00 AM »

JK - over in another thread he went into great detail about the mother....short version: 1) Mom does not appear to be the most stable person in the world 2) Mom has more than a little bit of trouble remembering what story she told to whom, particularly in financial matters 3) Novia wanted him to support Mom after they get hitched.

papi · « **Reply #17 on:** April 22, 2007, 09:44:34 AM »

Quote

but sounds like a treacherous path.

no argument here...i will deal with it later.

soltero · « **Reply #18 on:** April 22, 2007, 09:33:47 PM »

Quote from: michaelb on April 22, 2007, 09:40:00 AM

JK - over in another thread he went into great detail about the mother....short version: 1) Mom does not appear to be the most stable person in the world 2) Mom has more than a little bit of trouble remembering what story she told to whom, particularly in financial matters 3) Novia wanted him to support Mom after they get hitched.

I'm with JK...He said that new stuff came to the surface when he called it quits, and I am interested in what that might have been if he cares to share.

curranti · « **Reply #19 on:** April 22, 2007, 11:20:42 PM »

Quote from: utopiacowboy on April 22, 2007, 12:04:47 AM

I'm a lawyer but no pre-nup for me. I've been married for almost four years and I stand by my original decision. I wouldn't marry anyone with whom I felt that I needed to have a pre-nup.

I was married to the "right one" for 15 years then one day she changed. Starting screwing the neighbor etc etc etc.

Moral of the story.

The woman you divorce is never the woman you married.

I still to this day miss the woman i married.

utopiacowboy · « **Reply #20 on:** April 23, 2007, 07:06:53 AM »

Gotta be more to this story. Rarely do people just change without something happening to cause it.

curranti · « **Reply #21 on:** April 23, 2007, 03:08:49 PM »

Sure Life happens. She changed jobs after 10 years at the one she loved.

She hit 40 years old.

Just life things. Bingo Change city.

daytrader · « **Reply #22 on:** April 23, 2007, 03:32:17 PM »

...I have to laugh at the sudden life changes of the ex-wife of curranti, happened to me too! She turned 30, hormones radically changed in her body (visible physiological changes, none the worse for wear, however), personality changed about 120 degrees to almost 180 degrees from what I married. I saw it coming for about a year but there was a 90 day span of time around her birthday it really kicked in..., Bye, bye, babe!

DayTrader

Planet-Love.com · « **Reply #22 on:** April 23, 2007, 03:32:17 PM »

sean126 · « **Reply #23 on:** April 23, 2007, 03:34:56 PM »

Ut oh! Well, I've got about 10 more years with mine then. Anything a married man to do to divert disaster, besides shut up or duck?

utopiacowboy · « **Reply #24 on:** April 23, 2007, 09:26:56 PM »

Too late for you, Sean, but you could marry an old lady like mine. She was already 42 so no chance she was going to change!

News:

PL Gallery Random Image

Author Topic: "La Madre" The Conclusion...and thoughts (Read 7340 times)

Planet-Love.com

Ricardo

Planet-Love.com

Planet-Love.com

Sponsor Twr1R

PL Stats