PHOTOS - Of My Cali Diamond...

[P Daddy]

....just for the record, I've turned down offers from 21 yr old hotties in the USA...no need to learn spanish, no need for a US Passport.  She would stay as long as the $ held out...so, at current statistics, she would be with me for the rest of my life + 30 years. 

Daytrader, you REALLY expect us to believe this...I mean REALLY??  She would stay as long as the money held out??  For 30+ years??...were they willing to sign an iron-clad pre-nup??  I doubt it very much...time to get real, please.

I for one, am happy for your relationship...but don't doubt the sincerity of a 20 something hottie with a 40 something gringo, and I won't doubt the sincerity of your Cali Diamond...deal??

[fathertime]

just for the record, I've turned down offers from 21 yr old hotties in the USA...no need to learn spanish, no need for a US Passport.  She would stay as long as the $ held out...so, at current statistics, she would be with me for the rest of my life + 30 years. 

What kind of fool would spend the best 30 years of her life around someone she was not attracted to or interested in?  For money, to do what, be miserable?  If you say it, I'll believe you believe it, but it is hard to fathom.  Anyway your "Diamond" seems like a very good choice, and your intentions appear to be very good.  A woman could love a man with the types of family goals you write about, so I wish you well in that regard...

DT have you already told us what it is that makes this girl so special in your eyes, above all others?  I am following your story but can't remember if you mentioned this. 
Thanks
Fathertime!

[markanthony7]

Hi Day trader, I would like to ask the same question Father time asked, why is she the lucky one, I am sure you dated and contacted other women from SA, what distinguishes her from the others that you give her the distinct class of a diamond?, remember I am an agency owner and this is all informative and beneficial to me, with how I relate to the young ladies in our agency and assisting our customers, thanks1

[daytrader]

....here we go again, questioning people's veracity and motives...I've never questioned a person's commitment to another person on this Board.  If you have Pot of Gold and she is in her 20's all power to you!  Nothing I've ever written questions a woman's sincerity to a man; you must be confusing me with a insult-laden/personal attack contributor. 

By the way Daytrader, you don't look too bad for being bald, out of shape and weathered,

Thanks, but only opinions from latinas within 7 inches of proximity count, all others are ignored. LOL

It's just not a common or reasonable expectation for a working-stiff 2 weeks vacation a year Gringo going down to SA, that's all my point is.  If one is self employed and knows the language, has a flexible schedule, something is possible but it will take a LOT of work. 

On these forums there seems to be a stereotype that all 20 something Colombian hotties are gold-diggers, especially with men 15 years older and up.

In other words, don't lump me in this this group as quoted above.  I abhor stereotypes.

I think we should start a new thread called, the 3 things a guy needs to do to make a woman happy.  If you do those 3 things every day, a pure-hearted woman will not leave you.  It's really quite easy; the trick is finding a pure-hearted woman in this society. 

On another note, I've enjoyed  Papi's recent posts, they've been on the mark and quite acerbic.

Wishing everyone well, and hoping no further 'gutter-sniping'  (apologies to Rex Harrison) will occur.......

DayTrader   

[daytrader]

from FatherTime

DT have you already told us what it is that makes this girl so special in your eyes, above all others?

Sure, give me a little time to put my thoughts together and I'll post them later today.  My pleasure.

DayTrader

[papi]

On another note, I've enjoyed  Papi's recent posts, they've been on the mark and quite acerbic.

would you like to become an official card carrying member of the fan club? If so, please send $10 along with a self-addressed return stamped envelope to the following address:

Papi Fan Club
6969 Papaya Way
Cali, Colombia

[sean126]

I can understand DT's opinion and what P Daddy is saying.
While it's not AS common in the U.S....but after talking to my family and friends in Baq. it is not unheard of for a much younger woman in her 20's to be with a much older man....40+ for sincere reasons and I would think a little more common there. 

I'm sure some people (myself included) have a natural tendency to carry over our stereotypes and belief system from the U.S. to other countries.  Some are incorrect, but understandable.

I personally didn't think it was as common (for sincere reasons) until I got to talking to people over there.

[blockbuster]

Sean,

 I'm sure a Baq babe is more than happy to find a good sincere average guy in his 40's. Supply and demand. Will the same relationship work on U.S. ground? That is the question. In Colombia a person with a 10 year old car is considered cool because at least he has a car. Someone with a brand new Nissan is considered rich. Here a person with a ten year old car is somehow questioned in our mind, having a new car is normal so you're not too special.Our perception somehow changes there and I would imagine for a woman it change here.

  DT is living in Miami. That is where a majority of latinas live. Yet.it's difficult for the average gringo who would do very well in Colombia to do well with the latinas there. The answer is easy. Supply and demand is on her side now. She may have sincerly accepted an older gringo in Colombia,just as we may accept an older gringa here, now there are choices.

  Guys like PD dating the young ones there are the lucky few guys who'se stock does not go down with age because he was born with great genetics and has a great financial present and future. But most of us are not so lucky. Therefore, sure you will meet sincere women over there happy to date an older good guy because at least she has a man where good men are scarce. Just like you will meet guys here happy to date some "average" gringa his age oer older because at least he's got a girl. But when an abundance of great choices of the opposite sex is put in front of us, unless we are at least 90% satisfies with our original choice,we will be like kids in a candy store wanting to sample our dream girls or guys now easily available.That's pretty normal. One guy on another list has just gotten married and is complaining his wife now has access to the type of Colombian men here in the U.S. she would never have access to back in Colombia(company owners,ect). She seems very impressed with this idea. He's now trying to keep U.S. latinos away from his wife and vice-versa.

[sean126]

Yep, I agree.  I didn't really pay much attention until I asked them over there.

He's now trying to keep U.S. latinos away from his wife and vice-versa.

I feel sorry for that guy. sounds like he's got his hands full.

[daytrader]

What makes my Cali Diamond so special...to me....


Outward Appearance
1]  Her voice....She has a killer voice that I will not tire of hearing.. it is soft, not too high, confident yet not bossy.  ~~~ silky ~~~ After we first met at ACG, I walked her out to her ride (she had her regular taxi driver take her).  Well, she's walking around the Mall parking lot, and, even though she is speaking 100% spanish, I could understand everything she was saying (Can't find the driver, where is he??? Oh my gosh, how am I going to find him??!!).  That's when it hit me that I am entranced with her voice and how she speaks...I didn't want the moment to end;  it did, when she found the driver, but it was the most enjoyable 5 minutes walking around the parking lot in my life! 

2]  Her hair....absolutely killer.  She doesn't have bad hair days, even when it's hot and a little humid.  (In the Carribbean I am sure it will not hold up as well, but I'll cut her some slack!)

3]  Her skin....a beautiful copper color....mind-blowingly beautiful.  Among other Colombians I desire only to look at her.  Among non-Colombians, no interest whatsoever in others.     

Character Qualities

A] She doesn't say stupid things; I can honestly say she hasn't said anything stupid -- using 3 different translators, my rudiementary spanish and Systran 5.0 software I would pick something up somewhere.  Nothing.

B] She doesn't embarrass me out in public (pet peeve of mine with gringas).  She knows almost everyone.  When at LA 14 or a shopping mall, she will stop, chat for 45 to 90 seconds and then she's back with me/familia.  She never leaves you hanging out to dry, doing what she wants and the hell with what you want.  If she has something to do, biz to take care of, whatever, no problema...she'll explain what time she needs (it's latin time so add half an hour plus to every time a latina tells you)  and the communication loop is closed and everyone is on the same page. 

C] Excellent communication skills.  She's smart in what she says, how she says it. 

D]  Modesty.  In all areas she is modest; yet she can cut loose and have fun.  I don't think she will ever not be this way.  In our first meeting at ACG she used the term "tranquil" as her #1 character trait.  This is the number 1 trait I was looking for in a woman, after Faith in God.  She has a contentedness...the Apostle Paul says days before his execution in Philippans 4:11 "be content in everything" (NIV)....to find a woman that is content in most any circumstance is the key to a lasting relationship. It is near impossible to find this in industrialized countries, in my experience. 

E]  Faith.  She is a God Fearing Woman, of the same Faith as I (Christian Church, Acts 2:38 is the point of conversion to Christ).  She actively seeks God daily, our prayer times together are awesome (I get to hear her voice constantly say "gracias Señor" (Thank You Lord). At church service on Sunday we are one in Spirit even though I know about 3 words of the sermon.  We're both into the song service with passion and spirit. 

F]  Passion. She brings a quiet passion to everything.  Whether cooking, riding  bikes together, cutting hair or hiking in the tropical rainforest to the waterfall, she exhibits interest and passion when it counts. 

G] She is open to learning new things.  As we get older, this character trait diminishes greatly in  most people.  I am like a little kid, I am constantly learning and growing and want to be around similar people.  She is open to learning new things and has never been defensive around me or others.  This is mucho importante in meshing two different cultures, ages, etc.  Guys, if you take her to North America she needs to be flexible and willing to learn new things.  Look for this! 

H]  She is self employed therefore self motivated and self disciplined. She never went after her ex for child support, she didn't want the emotional hassle (he's in the States making good $$).  I was shocked to find this out and surprised at her independent self-sufficient streak.  Zero Gold Digging from this latina.  I have read a lot about latinas in Colombia and the good ones are put off by the discussion of money/material things if discussed in a braggadocio sense.  She excels in this area. 

I]  Manages her household well.  Kids are allowed to be kids but she sets limits and they respect and love her at all times, you can tell.  The kids are at the age that they are enamored at the thought of being grown up someday and want to be treated as adults.  This is a fun age in Colombia..in the USA it would likely be  a pain in arse.  That's the advantage of keeping them down in SA and not exposing them to the BS in America. 

J]  Team player.  Most importantly, I want a Companion and a Lover.  She wants to be around other people, she has excellent interpersonal skills, better than me.  She will make me a better person.  Whether we are spending quality alone time or familia time or neighborhood time or extended family time, it is great...I feel plugged in, even if I don't get most of the conversation. 

K]  Acceptance.  Major, big time trait here.  Seek a latina that is accepting of others; accepting of you; I can't remember being around a person that has all these traits plus this one.  You don't feel there is a boundary around her, where you are intruding in her space, emotionally or physically.  She is no push over, she's not easy but you don't see the hyper-criticalness of American Women or the 'detached I'm analyzing the crap out of you' look of an Urban Big City Babe.  Major put off if that ever occurs. Find a latina where that behavior never exists in her.  It will bring peace and tranquility to your relationship on your journey to eternity. 

Her flaws are minor and predictable so I can compensate for them when they occur. My flaws and weaknesses are evident at times and we laugh at them and go on.  I'll work on them daily to minimize the hassle to others cuz I luv the people around me and they luv me. 

Few things are big deals living in Colombia -- the simple things comprise your day -- commmunication, meals together, one on one time, work, going from Point A to Point B..those are big things for most Colombians that don't own cars...If those things occur without major incidents they're happy and content....

....and so am I.....

DayTrader

[sean126]

Excellent post DT.  It's easy to see why your on cloud 9.  Congratulations, again.

[Dan]

Excellent post DT.  It's easy to see why your on cloud 9.  Congratulations, again.

Ditto - all that Sean said. Hearty Congratulations!

If you haven't already, you might want to make a copy of what you just wrote and share it with her. I'd bet she will cherish and save it.

Nice work!

- Dan

[fathertime]

Thank you DT for such a thorough answer.  I can see you are a wacky character with quite a personality.  You will make the right woman very happy I imagine. 
It sounds like you will have excitement in your life for many years.  Moving to Colombia should be an adventure.  I'd love to grow avocado trees or something out there just for the fun of it when I hit age 50 or so.  Do you intend to do any work, or just good old retirement?

See ya,
Fathertime!

[daytrader]

Hey FatherTime...thx for the feedback, although "wacky" is a new adjective in my book about me!

I will be retired by the end of this year (Lord willing) but will always be "daytrading".  I can do that anywhere I am as long as there is high speed internet.  If/when I relocate to SA, I'll need multiple high speed internet connections,  a "slingbox" (in USA) shooting me American cable tv, Vonage, Skype, gotomeeting and Direct TV so I will have all the communications to support my clients, interact with brokers and trade. 

After that is set up, I want to locate a decent sized power boat and berth it somewhere in SA for weekend getaways, so we can hop a plane and be there via a direct flight (Cartegena maybe).

We'll see.. I'm taking it slow, one step at a time.  For $2 grand (total) a month anyone can live like a King in Cali.     


DayTrader

[el_ruso]

DT,

I wish you again good luck, thank you for sharing your story.  You are a thoughtful guy, and it is obvious why the diamond girl has fallen for you.  I wish you two much happiness.

I have also toyed with the idea of living PT in Colombia.  I do a great deal of work from home, and with a phone and cable line can do it theoretically from Tibet.  It is just a question of time.  I am working on expanding my business to Houston where I lived before, have trusted friends, and where frankly I will have no competition.  I will need to invest into advertising though, and I am weighing my options right now.  If I could set it up so that I will be able to stay at least 10 days per month in Colombia, I will think seriously to set up home there.  My current love interest is VERY close to her family (as are 99% of colombianas) and plus she has a little kid who is also used to her family and environment.  I am weighing my options, but I think it will be better to maintain them all there than in Miami for a multitude of reasons.  I wish you luck in realizing your plans, and I am sure of your success.

[markanthony7]

Blockbuster, your analogies are very illustrative and concise, you make excellent deductions and logic

[rpcv]

  But when an abundance of great choices of the opposite sex is put in front of us, unless we are at least 90% satisfies with our original choice,we will be like kids in a candy store wanting to sample our dream girls or guys now easily available.That's pretty normal. One guy on another list has just gotten married and is complaining his wife now has access to the type of Colombian men here in the U.S. she would never have access to back in Colombia(company owners,ect). She seems very impressed with this idea. He's now trying to keep U.S. latinos away from his wife and vice-versa.

Good Point Blockbuster! Not to mention there are plenty of AW who are eager to tell your Colombian wife all the things she is entitled to now that she's in the USA.

[daytrader]

One guy on another list has just gotten married and is complaining his wife now has access to the type of Colombian men here in the U.S. she would never have access to back in Colombia(company owners,etc). She seems very impressed with this idea. He's now trying to keep U.S. latinos away from his wife and vice-versa.

Having a Spiritual connection with your mate may help considerably in avoiding the consequences of a spouse "shopping in a candy store".  While everyone is fallible, a deep Spiritual conviction shared by both and nurtured daily proves invaluable.  Those couples that don't have this connection between them -- life can be scary from my perspective. 

Unfortunately in America, divorce rates among couples that attend Church regularly is about the same as secular couples.  I want to avoid this whole issue by living in SA during the early years of our relationship -- if and when it progresses that far.  It's a win/win for both of us, cuz she wants to stay in SA while the kids are still in school.

DayTrader

[flipflop]

Shes beautiful you are blessed

At her age she should still be able to have children, I advise you reconsider your stance on the issue. I was emotionally immature and selfish until the lil flip popped a slimey daughter into my arms. My life changed as I stood paralyzed by the dependency that I held. You sound like you would make a good father.

[curranti]

Daytrader,

beautiful girl and family, thanks for the pics and thanks for sharing.  With the barriers of communication, meeting and determing her and your true motivation.  You have beat the odds.

Congrats.

[utopiacowboy]

The problem regarding Colombians and foreign travel is not the lack of a passport. A Colombian passport can easily be obtained in one day. The problem is nearly every country has tough visa requirements for Colombian tourists. My wife's travel options expanded considerably as the result of having a US green card.   

[el_ruso]

I know Colombians can travel on passport only (without visas) to neighboring countries: Venezuela, Ecuador, Brazil, most likely Peru also.  You can take the girl to Rio, or to Ecuador if she likes nature.  I would recommend the latter.  Ecuador is a magnificent country with a LOT to see, cheap, clean, organized, but women on average are not as good looking as Colombians.  People are also a lot more reserved.  At least that has been my experience.  I have not been to Panama or Costa Rica.  I know a lot of Colombians go to Aruba and Curacao, so either they don't need a visa, or it is not difficult to get it.

Beleive it or not that Russian visa is a lot easier and cheaper for Colombians than for US citizens to get, which is actually why I will try to see if I could get Colombian citizenship if I marry a colombiana.  I know it is possible if I reside there, but maybe I could just buy property or something.  Anyway it is not urgent right now, and I don't know what the rules will be at that time.  I still have family in Russia, and want/ need to visit often.  If something happens to my father, I want to be able to just hop on the plane and go. 

Basically we left in 1990, and the freaking communists made everyone leaving to the West resign Soviet citizenship to be allowed out, and now to get it back I would have to pay $500 and sign an oath that I renounce citizenship of all other countries, which obviously I will not do.  I can't believe I need a visa to visit my own father in the country I was born in, but that's life.

Russian visa for colombians is like $50 the last time I checked, it's given AUTOMATICALLY in the main airport, or it can be obtained from the Russian embassy also automatically.  A US citizen going to Russia has to pay a lot more, three times more on average (depending on how quickly he wants it), fill out a questionaire where he was in the past (I think 12 years or something like that), where he works, who are members of his family, etc., and it takes normally a month or more to get it.

[KP2]

1st post.

Day Trader, Thank you for sharing your pictures. Very nice!

Some guys travel abroad many multiple times and come up empty handed, while other men can go and find someone in one trip. Although it may be a long shot, I wish you and your woman continued happiness and success.

[daytrader]

Thanks KP2...things continue to go well -- I spoke with the family a week after I left Colombia; the kids can't wait until I get back; they're afraid I'm to forget about them!  No Way!  I luv 'em!

You might want to check out my trip report "How I found my Cali Diamond in 72 Hours..."

If you need a good driver/interpreter in Cali, I recommend Oscar; his email is leo_xv@yahoo.com -- he is the best!  My success, in large part, is due to his efforts, especially on the 2nd trip! 

DayTrader 

[John O.]

Congrats on finding a real Colombian "gem" regardless of age. I don't know your story, DT, but I'm curious how it was to acquire an "instant family". What's the greater challenge, the relationship with the lady or the relationship with her kids?

As for the discussion topic, I often enjoy wading into these things. IMO, it's risky making generalizations: e.g., a 20-year age difference will never work. Sometimes they do work; there are an infinite number of variables to consider. Reality is like a continuum: a 10-year age difference is more likely to function than a 20-year difference. A 10-year age difference between Gringo & Latina is perhaps more likely to work than the same age difference between a North American couple. And so on.

I wish all the best for you and your new family.

John O.