What's Wrong With This Picture

[littlebhuddha]

I am definitely not a newbie to this procedure of finding a foreign bride. Eleven years ago I married a colombiana. We were married for10 years when things just fell apart. So I think I am smarter than the average bear. Here's the situation. I decided to look for a filipina bride a few months age. I was having a lot of trouble finding honest women on the website I was using, FilipinaCupid. I flamed out on my profile about the proliferation of scammers on the website. That brought a flood of women that were interested in me. I was skyping with several when I got a message from this rather beautiful 21 y/o lady. Mind you I am 60 y/o. So I didn't respond to her for a few weeks but she was persistent so I started chatting with her and found that she was a remarkable young lady. We have been chatting everyday now for about three months now and I am planning a visit in June. She has never asked for any money and has refused the only time I offered it. She does not want to leave the PI. She has professed her love for me. I am still on the fence with this. I don't think I could keep up with her. I am sure that there is something not quite right about this situation but I can't seem to put my finger on it. The age difference aside, I am having trouble finding the downside to this relationship. Does anybody have any ideas about what, if anything she might be up too?
Thanks

[bcc_1_2]

You know what the downside of this is. Short of flying over there and wanting a much younger girl to be your live-in girlfriend I don't see the point of continuing this with a woman that doesn't want to leave her country.

You could always hunt in Mexico which is a lot closer than going across the Pacific if you like Latinas but don't want to mess with Colombia again.

[fathertime]

Hey Littlebuddha,  well one of the key things you said was ‘you don’t think you could keep up with her’….that is probably true if she is a typical 21 year old.  She must be a cute young thing, but maybe you should just let her go.  I’m 45 and if I were single and looking, I don’t think I would touch a girl that age for marriage, because I’m not probably not going to be very interested in many things she is…in your case being 60 I would think it would be magnified. 
What could her angle be?  Who knows? Maybe she does sorta like you…but saying she ‘loves you’ seems very odd to me considering you have not met in person.   That would give me some concern. I suppose it is also possible when you arrive you will get robbed or worse...who knows?
 
As far as downside, well maybe there isn't much downside, depending on your perspective… Maybe you don’t want to get married again, in which case you could live there part time and come back here part time and enjoy the best of both worlds…If you want a marriage that is more likely to last the downside is you are wasting your time on what appears to be very long shot for the long term imo.....
what are you looking for?
 
Good luck guy,
Fathertime!   

[benjio]

I don't think I could keep up with her...

Ya know....they make pills for that. 

[robert angel]

I am definitely not a newbie to this procedure of finding a foreign bride. Eleven years ago I married a colombiana. We were married for10 years when things just fell apart. So I think I am smarter than the average bear. Here's the situation. I decided to look for a filipina bride a few months age. I was having a lot of trouble finding honest women on the website I was using, FilipinaCupid. I flamed out on my profile about the proliferation of scammers on the website. That brought a flood of women that were interested in me. I was skyping with several when I got a message from this rather beautiful 21 y/o lady. Mind you I am 60 y/o. So I didn't respond to her for a few weeks but she was persistent so I started chatting with her and found that she was a remarkable young lady. We have been chatting everyday now for about three months now and I am planning a visit in June. She has never asked for any money and has refused the only time I offered it. She does not want to leave the PI. She has professed her love for me. I am still on the fence with this. I don't think I could keep up with her. I am sure that there is something not quite right about this situation but I can't seem to put my finger on it. The age difference aside, I am having trouble finding the downside to this relationship. Does anybody have any ideas about what, if anything she might be up too?
Thanks

Marrying someone half your age (not that you used the word 'marry' this particular young lady) lessens the odds that it's going to work out. That said, I did it my self (although not with that wide a spread) and I've know her about twelve years, been married eight of them and it's been good. If it all goes south some day, I'll likely still feel we had a helluva good run.

Marry someone who you're approx. three times older, lessens them even more. At least if you live to age 80 in this case, at that point she'll only be half your age! Although I hear Viagra and all that stuff is dirt cheap over there, 'keeping up with her' is a concern. And most Filipinas expect you to keep up with them as an obligation at least. If you don't or can't, there may be trouble in island city. Interesting that she was persistent in trailing you--did she give particular, plausible reasons?

I'd strongly suggest spending as much time over there as possible, especially with someone as young as her. Time, time, time. Between seeing in 'real life' how compatible you really are, you'll also see how readily available women of all ages and socio economic backgrounds are over there. Not so much there, but to an extent nonetheless, it's likely you'll be doing a lot of explaining and educating her as to the 'ways of the world'. She won't understand a lot of 'Americanisms'--slang, many literary references, etc. You might meet and end up with someone else and in that case, hopefully part as friends with this girl.

We have a home over there and although I haven't fooled around on my wife, (I don't think I could do any better overall) but she has said several times that if we spent enough time over there, especially if I was alone, there'd be plenty of women trying to hit on me and the temptation would be significant. She's right on that. Like Paul Newman said "Why go out for a hamburger when you've got steak at home waiting?" But when they're jumping on your plate, so to speak, it can challenge your resolve.

Filipinas, and I know this sounds condescending, are often hopelessly romantic and quick to fall in love and say 'I love you". Many are, in the sense that we consider maturity, quite immature and innocent. Those qualities don't last forever.

[littlebhuddha]

Thanks for all the good advice. I'm not really crazy enough to marry someone that young. It's an ego boost at best. I am going to the PI in June. I told her I would stop in and see her but I don't plan on spending too much time with her. It's been 30 years since I've been there. I always told myself that I would go back and maybe even retire there. It was a very beautiful place. I did a little traveling around when I was there when I was in the Navy. There are so many places that i wanted to see the last time a I was there. I am going to meet several women that I met on FC and I am sure I will meet some ladies on my own. I am planning on spending about a month there. It's good to be back on P-L.

[indaycare]

Hey Littlebhuddha,

She's too young for you. but I'm not here to judge you. I saw many cases like this in the Philippines to be honest with you. every time I saw a young lady holding hands with  an older men nothing comes out in my mind. but money money money money.  Yea! I was being a judge mental huh? lol. but in the bright side I know some Filipina woman who are married with older men most of them are happy with they're life. what I'm saying is why don't you try it... and give her a chance to know each other even more. Your the only one who can tell if she's good enough for you and what's her real motive why she like you. beside you have almost two months to chat some filipinas if you want to meet more than one. it's your choose. just make sure that the woman you chatted is not working as a bar girl. find someone from the province they're much more realistic.


I'm curious why she don't want to leave PI. Make sure she's not married lol.

Please let us know the progress of your experience dating young Filipina.  I'm pretty sure there's some men had the same situation like you. with your experience they can learn from it. Good Luck.

"Inday"

[Ray]

I'm curious why she don't want to leave PI. Make sure she's not married lol.

 
Now this is a very important point Inday.
 
Because there is virtually no divorce in the PI, a woman who has been married over there may say she doesn't want to leave her country because she knows that she can never get a fiance visa or legally marry over there.
 
Good observation!   
 
 
Ray
 
 

[piglett]

I got a message from this rather beautiful 21 y/o lady. Mind you I am 60 y/o. So I didn't respond to her for a few weeks but she was persistent so I started chatting with her and found that she was a remarkable young lady.

A "good girl" in the Philippines always wants the man to make the 1st move


1st red flag IMHO


i have to give it to you straight Little


she may very well be married or at least have a kid stashed some place that you don't know about


they will tell just about any kind of lie you can think of to get what they want


one of my pinay wife's many cousins has smart phone in hand & is looking for a rich kano 


she sure isn't the only one


so keep your eyes open at all times








good luck
piglett