American Women are crazy and the men are wimps

[aconcepts]

Glad you get it VM. I was staring to wonder as in other posts you mentioned you liked career girls I believe... I have met very few western career girls that retain their feminine qualities.


I have been addressing this topic for almost two decades as I noticed the differences between the kung fu practitioners of my generations versus my students.


My students did not have the ability to connect with the wild man like my peers did. I had to bring it out in them. It had been suppressed by feminism and the its not good to be a hunter kind of thing....

[whitey]

Feminism has not only priced western women out of the market, it's left them unhappy and lacking the ability to resolve that unhappiness. If you marry one, that underlying unhappiness is going to get projected onto you. I guarantee it.

I hear what you're saying V-man, but I don't think feminists have even come close to pricing themselves out of the market.  There seems to be a line up of men willing to marry them.


Our little intrepid band of adventurers on this site are a tiny tiny minority.  Most men don't realize they have other options, and even most of those that do will never be willing or able to get on a plane and do something about it.

[V_Man]

Whitely, unfortunately you are correct.
I think this is mostly about education.

In this part of the world it's not such a small minority. Actually is quite common. Already I have noticed some of the younger women questioning the ruling feminist ideology, simply because it in no way reflects the reality all around them. Also men here have always been rough and ready so they are not so easily feminised to the same exent as some western countries.
Even so, it takes time to change a whole society.

The more we discuss it the more it will gain momentum.

[V_Man]

Glad you get it VM. I was staring to wonder as in other posts you mentioned you liked career girls I believe... I have met very few western career girls that retain their feminine qualities.

... and so you see, I went to Colombia and got myself a latin one. 

[aconcepts]

Good move. There are feminine career girls here in CR as well. Actually I am taking one to the beach in Manuel Antonio Saturday. She is in her mid 30's. I am an equal opportunity dater! So politically correct AC!!! Jajajaja

[rscott4]

Hey all, talk about a thread taking a turn. OK, so it's a warm late spring Friday evening and I decided to stay at home once again- (on a Friday night no less) Did all the yard work on my home today (tired) and realizing that there is nothing in town to go out about. I guess I have quit pursuing the ladies, any of them in my area, that simple. And there are just a few that and at one time I actually thought were worth a try. Been a waist of my time. 20 yrs of this crap.  The funny thing is that I can usually find attractive women, Late 30's early 40's, (like one or two out of 50, haha) at a local watering hole and strike up a conversation but I have no desire to anymore and not looking at the young stuff (no future there) It is a cyclical spiral into a pretentious selfish world that I will not go now.
So here I am. I have been fortunate to work for the same company in the engineering field for 23 yrs and can retire early in 4 yrs or so. So should I go on a trek this August to Jamie's place perhaps or just wait another 4 yrs then do that,  and/or just move somewhere south of the border? I'm not getting any younger, I'll be 54 ish by then and even if I hold to my workouts and fitness... still. The clock ticks, Life is short!  Hey, I always liked Puerto Rico, and being a Territory/ok might as well be a state of the U.S. I could branch out from there. 
Maybe I should just dive-in; August and get my feet wet in Colombia?

I actually flew across the country once to meet a Filipino girl that I was chatting on line with a few years ago. She had recently arrived in Vancouver Canada on a domestic work/resident status thing that Canada dreamed up I guess a while back (silly indentured domestic help thing/cheap labor). And hey , I was born in Halifax, Nova Scotia Canada so I'm also a citizen there (I can make a little fun)...., Drive from Pittsburgh to Toronto now and then to visit friends. BTW Canadian Girls are no picnic.  So Anyway, the Filipino girl (37) was nice but no chemistry, NO PASSION there.
I made the mistake of putting all my eggs in one basket!

Guys, don't do that. Don't spend endless time corresponding with just one that you see on a dating site! Lots of money to travel for a one shot. I got off easy. I just flew to Vancouver ( beautiful city BTW) not the entire way to the  Philipines for just a one shot. 

Think I will keep studying my Latin-American Spanish for now.... So, any advice?

Scott

[Brazilophile]

Think I will keep studying my Latin-American Spanish for now.... So, any advice?

Scott

Yes!

Since you have the opportunity to retire in a few years, I think you first need to decide where you most want to spend your retirement.  That will determine your strategy for finding a suitable ladyfriend/wife. 

If you prefer to retire in Canada or the US, then you will need to find a lady whom you can bring here and will adapt to life here.

If you prefer to retire as an ex-patriate, then you need to decide in which country you will retire.  Once you make that decision, then your best strategy is to limit your ladyfriend search to that country. 

Based on your last post, it seems to me that you haven't yet thought deeply about those types of issues.  A former poster and moderator here, named Hoda, has a saying: "Get a check-up from the neck up."  The saying is to mean that a guy needs to be clear headed, clear eyed, and have a clear focus BEFORE he goes South to find a lady because there is a lot to distract a man.

Scott, are you clear about what you are looking for in a woman, clear about what you have to offer that woman, and clear about when you will be ready to commit to that woman if and when you find her?

[InnocentVixen]

I'd look forward to a challenge but not from a 20 something girl; I am more attracted to a woman;  in the range of mid 30's early 40's; one that really understands the ups and downs of life. I live in a University town loaded with girls in their 20's and enjoy their game play but at the end of the night I decide whether it goes any further or not.... usually not anymore.

He's going to have to unlearn everything he thinks he knows, and step up his game.  After that, we'll see.  If he can learn and adapt, even if he gets taken and burned a few times, he'll be spoiled by what the world has to offer beyond the horizon and won't look twice at those college town girls again.

A little bit late on my reply but some great advice here, particularly from Bob the way I see it, please do keep in mind that you are going to another country, college girls are a whole different story outside the US so don't limit yourself and just talk to everyone out there to get a feel of the difference in ages when it comes to women in that culture, to some we can be extremely more mature than expected, to some others we are so over protected that we can be a bit on the childish side looking for a daddy instead of a husband, it won't hurt you to talk with a younger woman or one that you would have not considered if she was in the US, at least you will know for sure what the difference is before you can figure out the kind of woman you are looking for no matter what country you decide to look in, best of luck~

[Bob_S]

Think I will keep studying my Latin-American Spanish for now.... So, any advice?

Go ahead and book a trip with Jamie's agency ASAP.  Get your feet wet, taste the local culture and meet the people.  The benefit of an agency is that it provides a safer environment for exploration, a sort of base camp, from which you can venture out little by little as you get comfortable.  Heck, you might find you don't even like Colombia after you spend a week there.  Better to find out now, huh?  Rather than 4 years down the road after much anticipation and planning potentially wasted.

[rscott4]

All very interesting points. .
I am going to look at the next few years as a open minded endeavor. Go to some different places on my view screen manly from a vacation and exploration perspective, talk with a wide age range of diverse people. Then after a time I will have a better understanding of what feels right and where to hang my hat perhaps.
Some of what I observe in my local world and tend to categorize are not at all what are the ways out there among different cultures. I will try to keep that very much in mind.
Nice real perspectives Vixen, Bob, Brazilophile
I am learning to unlearn many things.  And I can see how life's frustrations can easily cloud ones perspectives. 

[aconcepts]

Regarding a woman’s age there are the super visual men and I would put myself and FT in that group here. We are men that need what we perceive to be physically beautiful women next to us. It’s a requirement for me.
 
I wish it was not.
 
I keep waiting for it to change. I like the comfort of a 30 something year old but….
 
Actually I have made conscious efforts to reconsider dating women that were attractive but not twenty something beautiful.
 
So I recently took a day at the beach to get to know a 37 year old attractive actress, producer and dedicated mother with a interesting personality.
 
What I found out was
 
What a difference between a child like world and an adult world.
 
Child like world: No baggage. Adult world: Baggage
 
Maybe that is a big part of the attraction to twenty somethings.
 
And yes I have some baggage but I don’t let it define me.
 
After we met her niece, she said she wanted to hug and sleep with her because she is so cute and sweet. I said, don’t you want to hug and sleep with me (teasing her)? She said matter of factly, “Men always hurt you. Always” 
 
Divorce is drawn out here in Costa Rica. They can takes years. So she is in the tail end of a divorce, so I give her the benefit or the doubt of just not being ready, even if it has been almost two years of separation.
 
I know she likes me, but considering her baggage and considering that a twenty something Colombiana walked up to us on the beach to visit the loose dog (no, not me) we were feeding, and I had to do my best not to pay attention to her, and her organic happiness and youthful beauty, I just can’t see the 37 year old again.  Too bad because I like her. And there are not a lot of women I like as a companion. As I have said I doubt men and women have much in common except the bed and children (two very important things I might add).
 
I like her conversation and her maturity. But with that maturity in her case came considerable baggage.
 
So I endorse what IV says about college age women.
 
RS – you might want to consider Costa Rica as a place to get your feet wet. I am not sure I would pick this place for you to find a wife though. However, it’s an excellent place to get to know Latin America.
 
I have met several Colombianas here. Truthfully, I find them the most fascinating women. I can only describe them as naturally alluring. As feminine as feminine gets – outwardly. Just as feminine as famine gets inwardly with the few Asians I have met.
 
I really cannot explain it. Like Cubans they have a reputation for hidden agendas and from what I have heard, as I have not been to Colombia, most describe them as what I would call treacherous.
 
So that might not be the place to start. jajajaja
 
Personally I wish Brazilians spoke Spanish. They seem to be more balanced and just as exotic. Spanish did not come easy for me. Portuguese? Oh my God not another language barrier. They cause misunderstandings, big and small.
 
I would probably look for a long-term companion there and bring her back to the ranch here in Costa Rica. Not the US. One reason is the language barrier for her and the other reason is the US contan
 
Here it is said that there are gems in Colombia, I believe that. So I am getting my ducks in a row so I can spend a couple of months there.
 
However my Spanish is pretty good and I have an understanding of Latinas. You may want to get a feel for that (all puns intended) before you go to Colombia or Cuba.
 
I have said this before: If I was to start this journey again, I would go east rather than south. Because I am so visual (even for a man0 and because I am a romantic and will put up with the plain for higher romantic highs, I choose south.
 
That said, let me be clear: It’s not for everybody, especially timid Americans who expect Latinas from another culture to enter their world and behave according to your expectations of honesty, and civility in general.
 
Now I am a man that has had incredible highs in my life, and I know no matter what, it’s never going to get as good as it was once (and it was unexplainably good and I will die a happy man). I have already been to the top of the mountain.
 
So RS, in that sense I like your timing and don’t get discouraged about your age (as I do while walking down the mountain, as I know it’s never going to be as good as it once was), because if you have not been to the top of the mountain you are at the perfect age to get there.
 
Just pick your mountain carefully.
 
I think Brazilfile again and repeatedly gives insightful and straightforward consul.