What If You Found Out Your Girl Was A Webcam Girl?

[maritime04]

good post intresting topic
 
i would value honesty above anything eles. trying to pull the wool over your eyes and liying to you is a bad way to start a relationship. i would not get invloved with a girl who lies to me or is a webcame girl. the odds are against it, but theres always a shot of sucess.
 
However i dont judge what a poor girl in a poor thirdworld country needs to do to "get ahead", lets be honest its not murder, its sex worker. Time is the only ally you have in determining the quality of a person, that and good common sense on your part.
 
There are allot of people out there, who judge the men who choose to find a "foreign bride", in a very negative way. horny old men, rich westerns looking for a salve, abuse and mistreatment or the women are seen as gold diggers, ect..ect..ect...EVERYONE here would probly disagree with that, or say the reality is much more diffrent then that. I think the same should go for our webcam girl, or even prepagos, its probly best to leave american morality or least give it a rest while in country like Colombia.
 
We can draw moral lines in the sand, but thats all they, lines in sand. none of us knows what its like to be dirt broke, live in a barrio or be a pretty girl in a country like colombia, with a culture of sex, regatton, legal prostitution, and allot of poverty.
 
 
 
 

[notgoingtofindithere]

this post came at a good time for me.. I was on latinamericancupid and met a beautiful paisa that claims to be a secretary but on her profile .. she shows as entertainment/media.. when I asked her about that, she said that she does that after her regular secretary job and wouldn't say exactly what she does in entertainment.. then when I got her msn,  her tag showed "te subire el cielo" which means I will take you to the sky... when I questioned her about that, she said that it was for her mother that just passed away..
 
This girl moved from medellin to bogota and fits the profile of a cam girl.. This, I think , is much more common then I ever thought. Thanks for the heads up!! This post saved me a lot of time. muchos banneras rojos jjajaja

[Traveler]

"100% deal breaker?" Now that is a tuff question to answer....forget about how this type of work might change a girl for the moment.....the first thing you have to come to terms with is how it changes YOU knowning that she showed some annonymous person her privates over then internet....if your sense of morality just won't let you get past it...... then you are done....... No sense really in trying to justify it to yourself by saying that she would eventually become a prepago or that she isn't wife material because she is obviously a promiscuous woman. jajaja

The issue is that I am looking for a wife.  If I was looking for someone to spend a night with, well, yeah, whether she is in sex industry or not doesn't matter.  But at this point in my life I am looking for someone to have a family with.  Criteria are different.  I want someone who makes right decisions in life, someone who could be a good example to my children.  A man must have standards.  No self-respecting man would consider marrying this type of a girl.  There are plenty of girls who are not working in web camming or other types of sex industry.
 
I don't judge those women.  They are not bad people, or necessarily "damaged".  I just know off the bat that they don't have the qualities that I want in a woman who will be a mother to my children and my wife for the rest of my life.  It's not morality, but practicality.  I want a woman that I deserve, not anything less.

[Calipro]

The issue is that I am looking for a wife.  If I was looking for someone to spend a night with, well, yeah, whether she is in sex industry or not doesn't matter.  But at this point in my life I am looking for someone to have a family with.  Criteria are different.  I want someone who makes right decisions in life, someone who could be a good example to my children.  A man must have standards.  No self-respecting man would consider marrying this type of a girl.  There are plenty of girls who are not working in web camming or other types of sex industry.
 
I don't judge those women.  They are not bad people, or necessarily "damaged".  I just know off the bat that they don't have the qualities that I want in a woman who will be a mother to my children and my wife for the rest of my life.  It's not morality, but practicality.  I want a woman that I deserve, not anything less.

Hey to each his own.....I understand your point of view....some of them are opportunists and some really do need the money.....so all things being equal why risk it.


I have noticed that quite a few guys on the board look the other way when it comes to other things women in Colombia do to increase their odds of financial success....namely joining a marriage agency. jajajaja


I guarantee you that money considerations are a more motivating factor for most colombianas that join a marriage agency than colombianos being machisa.  And that is why all things being equal I would advise guys to look outside of them if at all possible.


There are some very sweet women in marriage agencies.... as there are webcam girls....where their true need vastly out weights any notiion of greed.....but for a gringo that doesn't speak good spanish and is trying to weed out the good from the bad in a short tiime frame....it is a tuff job....where success is often determined by blind luck if you ask me.

[Calipro]

Gadzooks!
Did I just whack off watching one of you guy's ex-girlfriends? 

Could be....but don't feel bad....there are plenty of guys out there just like you.....where the closest they are going to get to a hot chick in bed..... is looking at her on your computer while you sit in bed. LOL!!!

[Alabamaboy!]

However i dont judge what a poor girl in a poor thirdworld country needs to do to "get ahead", lets be honest its not murder, its sex worker

Yeah...I grew up super poor and worked my ass off to pay my way through college. And when that was not enough I sold my blood, signed up for medical experiments on my body, etc. If I could have been a webcam guy, I would have been working every night!!!!! And if some girl ever told me later on that they would not marry me because of it, I would have said "oh well" and not thought anything of it. I would not expect a girl to go for it. I would just hope they would not have a problem with it.

I think the webcam girls probably think the same. I don't think they are really going to sweat it if a guy finds out and dumps them because of it.

[Zon]

I do not operationally run these types of businesses.  (that would be foolish!  I can not talk my way out of a speeding ticket in Colombia or Argentina.)

However, , I am involved in the affiliate marketing business that supports them.  I do have several clients that operate multiple studios in South America and other countries.  Each country has its own unique legal positions - sometimes laws are applied in a nonuniform way.  It is important to make sure that all adult content complies with 2257 and other regulations. ANYWAY ...

I know that NONE of the managers, or owners, or these studios take their secretaries to the no tell hotels.  ( probably because they enjoy a target rich environment and are able to have more natural relationships with ease).  I have seen management of these businesses be anything BUT exploitative to the staff.  The performers earn 60% of their sales, and the studios do much to support and make those sales possible.  (dedicated internet service is VERY expensive in South America and requires multiple year contracts, for example).  It is possbible for a good performer to make 400 - 600 dollars a week.  A good web cam studio is a very management intensive business - everything from cafateria; to baby sitting; to techinical service; to normal general administration.  No walk in the park.

I know 100's of web cam models in the good ole USA too, by the way.  How many attractive ladies would like to make 3 - 5 grand a month from the privacy of their own home in this economy?  and, I am talking elementary school teachers, bank tellers, trainers, dental hygienists - some of you ridget types would be very surprised.  The YouTube generation is now in their 20's things are different nowadays.  So the idea that is some kind of 3rd world exploitation is largely off-base.

CaliPro's recent comments strike a perfect balance of zero rose colored glasses versus the hopeful possibilities that many members here possess.   His comments are a gift to you, because the rules are different in South America than in the USA.  It is damn near impossible for you to accurately judge and appraise if you do not try to see through another person's eyes.

( give me a buzz when you get into town CP.  I will be here until late September )

[Colgando]

Hey to each his own.....I understand your point of view....some of them are opportunists and some really do need the money.....so all things being equal why risk it.


I have noticed that quite a few guys on the board look the other way when it comes to other things women in Colombia do to increase their odds of financial success....namely joining a marriage agency. jajajaja


I guarantee you that money considerations are a more motivating factor for most colombianas that join a marriage agency than colombianos being machisa.  And that is why all things being equal I would advise guys to look outside of them if at all possible.


There are some very sweet women in marriage agencies.... as there are webcam girls....where their true need vastly out weights any notiion of greed.....but for a gringo that doesn't speak good spanish and is trying to weed out the good from the bad in a short tiime frame....it is a tuff job....where success is often determined by blind luck if you ask me.

I have not seen anyone here look the other way when it comes to evaluating women and their intentions, irrespective of where you meet them. Some of the women I met in the agency did not want to leave their country and they have a lot of fear about it, in fact, I know of at least one instance where the woman got cold feet and backed out of a marriage proposal, it would be a hard thing for them to do, to leave their country, to leave their mothers and hermanos and take a chance on a foreigner, who could very well be a jack-a$$ in his home life. I did meet some women with an agenda I was not cool with, easy to weed out coals in Colombia, I find Colombianas to be very transparent after spending some time with them. Transparent in regards to whether they were really into me or not, or whether they had a capture a gringo or bust agenda or not.


I have had a chance to read your posts on www.poorbuthappy.com CaliPro and I must say, I think your advice is better suited for guys who have to fly South of the Boarder to get laid, maybe ISG would be a better fit for you. Your ideas do not seem particularly useful for us guys trying to find a good woman, maybe your ideas are good for what women, men and circles to stay away from when people fly south of the border. To each his own, I just find it to be nonsense when guys like you and ZonZon try to give out advice on finding a wife when clearly, you guys are not interested in finding a wife, or at a minimum, sorely misguided on how to capture a wife and keep her. I think you have excellent advice if a guy is interested in getting laid SOTB and playing games with women, just not my cup of tea, I do not need to go to Colombia to do that, plenty of that type of opportunity stateside.

[Zon]

Suite yourself ... "CaliPro and I must say, I think your advice is better suited for guys who have to fly South of the Boarder to get laid, maybe ISG would be a better fit for you. Your ideas do not seem particularly useful for us guys trying to find a good woman"   

you may be one of those that only want to see, what you want to see?  I have spent much time SOTB and had a whole bunch of adjustment to do before I could see things clearly from the point of view of the woman, or the culture. 

I know there are some successful marriages that happen in a only one week visit between two people that do not speak the same language.  But, someone wins the lottery too.   When this board promotes Victorian values of courtship, and applies them to cities like Cali and Medellin, WOW! there is a big disconnect.  If you do not think so, you are seriously diluting yourself.

And, a constant assumption from people on this board is that there are TYPES of people and that such things are marked in stone.  Good girls / Bad girls.  Wife Hunters / Sex tourist.  It is asinine! 

PS - Matter of fact, - I have had two separate discussions with large agencies in the last week - both of these people, with years and years of experience, would endorse CaliPros observations as REAL WORLD, and shake their head's in amusement to the fantasy that some American men want to create.

[Bob_S]

I think the webcam girls probably think the same. I don't think they are really going to sweat it if a guy finds out and dumps them because of it.

I doubt that.  We guys can compartmentalize things, but chicks take things personally.  If you dump her for reasons that imply she would not be a good wife or mother, she may come after you with a knife.   

[Calipro]

I have not seen anyone here look the other way when it comes to evaluating women and their intentions, irrespective of where you meet them. Some of the women I met in the agency did not want to leave their country and they have a lot of fear about it, in fact, I know of at least one instance where the woman got cold feet and backed out of a marriage proposal, it would be a hard thing for them to do, to leave their country, to leave their mothers and hermanos and take a chance on a foreigner, who could very well be a jack-a$$ in his home life. I did meet some women with an agenda I was not cool with, easy to weed out coals in Colombia, I find Colombianas to be very transparent after spending some time with them. Transparent in regards to whether they were really into me or not, or whether they had a capture a gringo or bust agenda or not.


I have had a chance to read your posts on www.poorbuthappy.com CaliPro and I must say, I think your advice is better suited for guys who have to fly South of the Boarder to get laid, maybe ISG would be a better fit for you. Your ideas do not seem particularly useful for us guys trying to find a good woman, maybe your ideas are good for what women, men and circles to stay away from when people fly south of the border. To each his own, I just find it to be nonsense when guys like you and ZonZon try to give out advice on finding a wife when clearly, you guys are not interested in finding a wife, or at a minimum, sorely misguided on how to capture a wife and keep her. I think you have excellent advice if a guy is interested in getting laid SOTB and playing games with women, just not my cup of tea, I do not need to go to Colombia to do that, plenty of that type of opportunity stateside.

I have not seen anyone here look the other way when it comes to evaluating women and their intentions, irrespective of where you meet them.

Every time I hear "colombian women join marriage agencies because they are tired of cheating colombianos" I know they don't have the straight dope.   Like all good propaganda it is partly true....colombian women don't like colombian men to cheat on them....it is not true that it is a marjor motivating factor for them to join a marriage agency....marry a gringo and move to another country. LOL!!!  How many attractive, well off women do you find in a marriage agency....not many...and they don't like cheating colombianos anymore than the poor ones. jejeje

 Some of the women I met in the agency did not want to leave their country and they have a lot of fear about it, in fact, I know of at least one instance where the woman got cold feet and backed out of a marriage proposal, it would be a hard thing for them to do, to leave their country, to leave their mothers and hermanos and take a chance on a foreigner, who could very well be a jack-a$$ in his home life.

Every women that joins a marriage agency is signing up for the idea of leaving their country and family behind. If a marriage agency chick doesn't want to leave her country with you then she really doesn't love you and might not even really like you. 


Chicks that really love you will jump at the chance to marry you....the woman that backed out really did the guy a favor....much more likely that she just couldn't see herself sleeping with a guy she really wasn't into for two years...than her suddenly realizing that she just couldn't bear to leave her lovely family behind. jajaja

 I did meet some women with an agenda I was not cool with, easy to weed out coals in Colombia, I find Colombianas to be very transparent after spending some time with them. Transparent in regards to whether they were really into me or not, or whether they had a capture a gringo or bust agenda or not.

You are right some are real easy to spot but some of the older ones with kids are not so easy to spot.....especially for some guys that haven't had nooky in so long....well....let's just say they lose all sense of reason.

I have had a chance to read your posts on www.poorbuthappy.com CaliPro and I must say, I think your advice is better suited for guys who have to fly South of the Boarder to get laid, maybe ISG would be a better fit for you. Your ideas do not seem particularly useful for us guys trying to find a good woman, maybe your ideas are good for what women, men and circles to stay away from when people fly south of the border.

I have no idea what you are talking about....if you are going to bad mouth me at least take the time to elaborate about what you are talking about.....I have no idea what ISG stands for so please explain your rant.


My advice is free to be used as you like..if you would like to get laid or find a wife or whatever suits you....some people appreciate me taking the time to give my insight into colombia.....so I have some more advice that you probably won't like jejeje.....if you don't like my posts don't read them.

To each his own, I just find it to be nonsense when guys like you and ZonZon try to give out advice on finding a wife when clearly, you guys are not interested in finding a wife, or at a minimum, sorely misguided on how to capture a wife and keep her. I think you have excellent advice if a guy is interested in getting laid SOTB and playing games with women, just not my cup of tea, I do not need to go to Colombia to do that, plenty of that type of opportunity stateside.

Blah, Blah, Blah....again if you don't like my posts then just don't read them....if you don't like my advice don't follow it....now go into the bathroom...look in the mirror and slap yourself in the face for showing us all what a whining little bitch you are jejeje


I don't have an agenda here....I don't play games with women or anyone else...and I call it like I see it....it's just that simple....don't like it then lump it. jajaja

[fathertime]

I know there are some successful marriages that happen in a only one week visit between two people that do not speak the same language.  But, someone wins the lottery too.   When this board promotes Victorian values of courtship, and applies them to cities like Cali and Medellin, WOW! there is a big disconnect.  If you do not think so, you are seriously diluting yourself.

And, a constant assumption from people on this board is that there are TYPES of people and that such things are marked in stone.  Good girls / Bad girls.  Wife Hunters / Sex tourist.  It is asinine! 
 

It is funny  how some people complain about always finding the golddiggers/ho’s etc while other men don’t have this problem.  I don’t think it is a coincidence.  It says quite a bit about who a person chooses to associate himself with.     Some people actually think the preponderance of what a smart wife-hunter will find in Colombia is ho’s.  These people are seriously diluting themselves.


If a wife-hunter shows good common sense and judgement, his odds are good that he will find a sexy latina wife!  Some people lack what it takes though and will always be fooled and choose the wrong type of lady. 




Fathertime! 

[Jeff S]

I guess that I must be one of those rigid types who isn't interested in women who'd strip for money, even though it's in the privacy of their own homes - whether they're a school teacher, dental hygienist, a poor girl from a South American poor barrio or, even the daughter of a multi-millionaire hotel baron. Call me whatever you want, but someone who would do that doesn't have enough class for my taste. If that's what you're looking for - fine - have at it. You'll have no competition from me.

[fathertime]

I need to come clean, CaliPRO. Actually, it was my hot Peruana that was doing the whacking while I was checking out a PL member's Colombiana playing with herself on the webcam. A sort of virtual threesome if you will.

Wow Icachico, you sure do look familiar in that avatar photo! Where have I seen you?   
Well anyway, keep enjoying your hot Peruana and TRY to keep one step ahead of the angry posse!


Fathertime!

[robert angel]

Sort of looks like Paul Allen--the MicroSoft co-founder--Donald Trump recently bought his Boeing 757 'personal jet' from him. Allen's a got all the killer toys--yachts, sports cars, still wants to be a rock star, brings great musicians and producers to his state of the art studio, etc.
I'd think he'd probably just try and buy his own S. American country, rather than web camming with a Peruana by his side...

[JimD]

I need to come clean, CaliPRO. Actually, it was my hot Peruana that was doing the whacking while I was checking out a PL member's Colombiana playing with herself on the webcam. A sort of virtual threesome if you will.

Icachico that was funny.

[maritime04]

you can look at it from allot of diffrent angles, but the bottom line is you judge a women on the issues that are important to you!
 
Diffrent men like diffrent women, and i would be willing to bet, that my perfect wife is not anyone's eles.
 
I have to agree with Cali, and Zon, about realistic views about Colombia, Webcam jobs have become very popular in country, and a have turned many prepago into higher end prepago. progress i guess!
 
Want to determine if that chica of yours is a gold digger? does she help you save money? is she willing to spend her own time to find a cheaper hotel, or apartment for you? does she insist on your spending money? common sense and some time will lead you to your answear.

[Traveler]

Well, I would say that whether a woman has ulterior motives or is genuinely into you can often be deduced by how she is making love to you, how affectionate she is with you.    
 
The signs Maritime has mentioned can work too, but it's a lot easier to fake being nice and concerned than fake being in love.  If a girl is intelligent, disciplined and focused on long-term she can fake her concern over your finances.  Granted, colombianas are generally in the moment and rarely think long-term like that, but this is something to watch out for.

[no comment]

Wow Icachico, you sure do look familiar in that avatar photo! Where have I seen you?   
Well anyway, keep enjoying your hot Peruana and TRY to keep one step ahead of the angry posse! 

FT, I think you could scare off Icachico with some fluoride, if necessary.

[JimD]

I know a webcam girl. She just recently arrived in Cali with almost no job experience and of course no money. Webcam was the quickest way to earn money to pay for a room short of putiando (whoring). She comes from a coastal village on the Pacific side six hours in lancha south of Buenaventura. It only has electric a few hours a day from a big generator and there´s only one vehicle, a garbage truck because there are no roads. Her whole family was forced to leave a year ago because the paramilitares decided  to extort her father, a school teacher and he couldn´t pay. They told him they´d kill his whole family if he didn´t pay the vacuna (ie we´ll leave you alone if you pay so much money). They fled to Popayan but there´s no work there so she came to Cali. It doesn´t sound like an easy job. She has to get up at 3:30 am in order to start work at the studio at 5. That´s when her French and other European customers go online. She works a ten hour shift.  It´s not like her family are sissies.  Some years ago the AUC paramilitaries came into the village of Alto Naya not far north of her village and chopped up the population with chain saws accusing them of aiding the FARC guerrilla. They started by chopping off the hands of an 18 year old girl. Like a poster said above. Sometimes there´s a disconnect and it´s hard for guys from the US to grasp what life can be like in Colombia.
 

[pablito]

Jeepers, JimD, that's ugly.  I've got a few stories like that from my year in Thailand, stuff that never even made the local papers.  Of course the Thais tend to be somewhat less obvious and brutal.


I knew a guy from Hawaii who lived in a small village outside of town with his wife, and one evening when the local drug-runners were sitting outside drinking, the police came to town.  The cops sat down with them, shared some drinks and swapped  few jokes and stories, then left.  Shortly thereafter the drug-runners all dropped dead; the cops had poisoned the whisky before leaving.  The land of smiles, indeed.