I really enjoyed your essay in the age difference discussion. You were right on with so many points, and you don't learn them overnight; most you just learn by trial and error (more error than anything, lol). I couldn't figure out tampos for a long time, and often wondered why my wife did not want to fight/argue things out. This is just not in their nature and they have no experience with confrontation. They learn at a young age to avoid conflict (ie. arguments, fights and disagreements) and just close themselves up and sulk. Well, the good news is the longer they are here (with us in USA) they seem to acclimate to our way of having disagreements and arguments. It is very disconcerting to start having an argument only to have your wife clam up and refuse to respond to you no matter what. We are at a disadvantage from the very beginning because most of us did not have the luxury of dating and learning each other's ways and moods.
And Ray, I really liked your age formula, mostly because it fits my situation, haha. Also what you said about these ladies working their tails off to earn a degree, only to end up working in the mall for measly wages. I know that most jobs, even at Jollibee, require some kind of schooling, training and degree. I was shocked when I learned that those security guards you see everywhere need a bachelor degree.
As far as the age difference, I agree with all the responses with varying degrees. My family over there had no problem at all and the subject has never even come up. Sure they wanted a better life for their daughter, and yes we do send money now and then, but it is not expected. We did buy them a jeepney to help out financially, and it has worked out great. But this was not expected, I did it of my own volition and was happy to help them, as they have done so much for me and treated me very well on all 4 trips there. I really care about my Fil Family and will help them as much as is possible.
By the way, the age difference between my wife and me is 16 years. It has never been an issue and never even comes up between us or in the family here. Good Lord, my parents love her more than me, haha.
I think if your motives are pure and you are not just lusting after young girls, (I know that sounds corny, or perverse) you should not worry about the age thing. Sure it is flattering to have a young lady desire you and find you gwapo, etc..especially if you are middle aged, fat, ulp...even not so handsome. But this should not be priority #1; that should be finding love and companionship and lifelong commitment. Oh, well, I have rambled enough. Just wanted to say how much I appreciate this forum and all the great people here, even tho I dont' post much,,,, I do read here almost every day.
God Bless, and good luck to all you seekers of love and happiness, and the ones who are waiting for their mahals....believe me, it is worth the wait,
Dave
