Regular Guys...Where you at?

[blockbuster]

 Well, you have 3 more years till you're 30(which I think is the earliest a guy should marry) so you are almost there. By the time you find the girl you want it may be a couple years before you marry. I wish you the best of luck. You seem mature and know what you want.

[jm21-2]

Why should someone wait until they're 30+ to marry? That's absurd.

If you wait until 30+, if you want a family and several kids (let's say 3), you have to pretty much immediately start pumping out babies if you want to retire at a reasonable age (55). What does that mean? It means that there is less time for you to know what your wife is like during marriage. If she's a FW, it means she has less time to adapt to the country and learn the language before having kids. I personally think both of those things would make an already complicated marriage even harder. I suppose in some cases it could make it more stable though.

In any case, it's not what I would want. I want to make sure my marriage is stable before having kids. If she's foreign, make sure she adapts. THEN have some kids. But I also want to be retired at 55, not working extra years to help my kids with college, graduate school, getting started on their career, etc. I want that all done (as much as is possible) so I can relax and enjoy my leisure. This entails getting married in the late 20s. I don't see how RJS is being unreasonable in any way. There are more guys than you would think who actually want marriage. Who don't really enjoy dating and sleeping around with lots of women, don't really enjoy clubbing and partying, and look forward to settling down.

And as far as I know, the benefits of age in relation to marriage diminish greatly after 25. I can't see, for example, being 28 instead of 32 making any real difference. There are many other factors to look at. Here's a small list that seems pretty reasonable to me.

Factors                 Percent Decrease in Risk of Divorce 
Annual income over $50,000 (vs. under $25,000)   -30 
Having a baby seven months or more after marriage (vs. before marriage)  -24 
Marrying over 25 years of age (vs. under 18)   -24 
Own family of origin intact (vs. divorced parents)   -14 
Religious affiliation (vs. none)   -14 
Some college (vs. high-school dropout)   -13 

RJS has quite a bit going for him. I don't see how his timetable is at all off. His chances of success with a smaller age gap are probably better than if he's a few years older.

And he's older than me and getting more flak about his age than I ever did, which is a little weird. There's a 19yo guy who posts every now and then too.

[RJS]

According to those decreased risk factors I should be at a very low risk of divorce within the first 10 years, which is nice to know. ;p

I've been doing some research and I think my timetable is actually quite perfect assuming I can get things to go as planned. Assuming I find someone within my first couple trips (starting 6 mos from now), I would then hold-off for a year while getting to know them, visit as often as possible, etc. Once I was satisfied at having made the right choice I'd start the paperwork which takes about a year up here. I'll be done with school, be in my new job, be ready to buy a nice condo, and be married to a hot latina 5-7 years younger than me. 

[Ray]

RJS, that sounds like a good plan.

I agree with jm. Waiting to age 30 just for the sake of being 30 is stupid.

Don't wait. Start looking tomorrow...