Costa Rica still Rico / A residents take...

[aconcepts]

Have been residing here legally for a long time. I started real estate investing here in 1990. So I have done well and have an estate here therefore my take on the country is biased. Bottom line Costa Rica is a campesino mentality. The people are charming to your face but ethnophobic. They don’t like strangers. Even strangers from the next town! This place used to be a no-brainer. It was so cheap to live here (not anymore), no crime. I mean zero crime and there still is very little crime once you get to the campo outside the San Jose valley.
 
The great thing is it’s a small country, so you can get to people in powerful positions easily. Bad things are excessive jackass gringos here. Arrogant, and boastful. Really think their Babylon education and way of doing things makes them hot tuna. They look down on “these people.” They come to compete with the Ticos and feel betrayed when the Ticos don’t let them walk all over them. Also the real estate craze scarred the landscape badly. The Ticos don’t really seem to want the expats and retirement haven stigma anymore. Over the last 10 years or so, the Tico middleclass has grown significantly. And the pura vida attitude has left.
 
When I first came here it was an obvious frickin paradise. I knew I had to be part of it, part of the lifestyle. The foreigners here were an eccentric bunch of adventurers and we partied sometimes naked on the beaches at night in Manuel Antonio like children. Truly magical. There were only a handful of hotels and restaurants. Now it an over built zoo. Sad, very sad. But if you never knew it before many who go there love it.
 
I live in the coffee region overlooking the capital in a small but rather unfriendly little town. No one really talks much here except the courteous greeting and exchanging pleasantries around the village which  is charming. But do expect to be invited to anyone’s house.
 
Funny in the 90s there were many ingenuine relationships built to get close enough to a foreigner to cheat him or take advantage in some way. Now with the rising middleclass you don’t see that as much here in the San Jose valley. It’s hard to find a Tica like you guys talk about finding a Colombiana if you are a visitor. Those days of being a novelty gringo are way over.
 
Many gringos are in business here as an integrated part of the community as I am. We look at CR as our home. I am a little more than a year away from my citizenship and have an office downtown. Although I usually don’t partake with working girls, because I don’t wear condoms, and yes I did a lot of socializing in Cuba for many years never using one and no I do not have any diseases, I spend most of my time with interesadas in different areas and chicks that were once interasadas that have now turned in to friends with rights and good girls, but my office is close to gringo gulch - so when traffic is bad I hit some spots downtown (to wait it out) where the foreigners on vacation party.
 
Don’t go there at night because the class of women at night are way to serious and I remember the glory days there when it was all bored Ticas laughing and having fun. They would leave with you for a night of partying at different restaurants and bars and spend the night and become friends with rights and of course I treated them nicely but you could always call them and take them on dates to the beach without compensation besides picking up the tabs.
 
In that sense it used to be like Cuba which is still that way. Now CR has a much more show me the money mentality. Although I still have it like it used to be -  it is because I am practically Tico now and have years of experience here.
 
 Back to my point, the other day I was waiting out a missed appointment block of time with a client who had flight trouble so I went to a well known local bar at about One in the afternoon. I was sitting there drinking water disguised a gin .. short glass two limes ice and water, and a couple of chicks walk through the door happy as larks and present themselves to me. They started talking super high energy and then figured out I was not a tourist and then said they wanted to come back to my ranch with me. Well I usually scare em off pretty quickly with “I don’t use condoms.” And they said ok. I was kinda of stuck now. They were obviously semi-pros or most likely bored because the pros and even the semi pros have expensive clothes. Although tastefully dressed (Ticas really truly have great style and know how to make the most of the least when it comes to clothing), so now I was looking at taking these two cousins as it turns out to my spa at my ranch. Well they were so bouncy bubbly and happy I started buying drinks (which I very rarely do and never for a working girl) but let me tell you I passed a funfest 2 hours in that bar for $20 worth of drinks. Two solid 7 to 8 quality women 21 and 22 years old cousins one in each arm two hands full of ass, kissing on me, laughing grabbing them up and playing. I mean it was like being a teenager.
 
So there it is! You can walk into a bar in Costa Rica and for $20 have the kind of entertainment that is really priceless. I mean yes they knew I was a local with means and I am sure that made a difference and yes I have there phone numbers and will take both to the beach this or next weekend and we will have a great time and I will drop a bunch of money on a nice hotel room, sushi for three, bar and food tabs and yes I will probably buy them some cloths and a present for their kids,. However, when I was a roaring twenty something year old bachelor with means I would do the same with a couple of chicks except do it in Palm Springs. These girls took months to cultivate. Here I walk into a bar and vouala I have to super fun, super sexy chicks that I will not pay for the company but I will pay for the good time.
 
You are always going to pay its just a matter of where you place the expenses in the ledger. So is Costa Rica really Rico. For me it is. But I live here and I know how to deal with the Ticas. Not that I am an expert on women – hahahahaha.
 
I just tell them the truth. No condoms, no pay up front (or rarely pay upfront), friends with rights and yes I will pick up the tabs we will travel in my new Honda CRV and we will have a lot of fun. So think about it. I could act like a tourist and pay the going rate for these chicks and take them to the local kinky hotel (which I use with my good girlfriends quite often) and enjoy the steam showers and waterfall spa, giant screen TV, everything in granite, California king bed and dumbwaiter bar for $40 and the bar tab maybe $10 and $100 for each chick, so lets say $250 and the deal goes down in 2 hours plus. Or I cut the deal like a local gringo and take them to the beach for a day a night and a day. $125 on the hotel room (discount rate for a local reg 185) $150 on food and another $75 on bar tab, $150 on clothes and junk so I spend: $450 - $500.
 
Now I get wonderful company and laugh all the way to the beach including incredible foreplay, get to the room - shower and sex, go out and buy some sun dresses and stuff, head to the sushi bar and then to the ocean front casino to dance at night by the pool and drink at the pool bar. All this time I have two fun lively girls, one on each arm. Great food and I get to admire the other women at the oceanfront casino hotel, be myself, laugh my ass off make crude off color jokes and comments and later that night I am king again! Wake up recover poolside or on the beach, laughy and kissy in the shower maybe some vaigra to see if I can pluff off a full masker if not just lay naked with both of them watching TV after being in the sun all day with a little room service.
 
You ask, is Costa Rica Rico? Well I pay say $500 for the two girlfriend experience (not hooker experience) for a whole weekend and I had a great great time like the kind of stuff you inner smile about for the next several months and I have made a couple of friends. That can be good and bad, but like I said if you are truthful with them. Like saying “hey no sad stories about need for money and don’t call me up a week later looking for a loan.” Just say we will have a great time but lay down the ground rules. Yes kissing cousins, yes, no condoms, yes we will have a beautiful hotel and great food and pretty much open bar, and yes if you make a fool out of yourself I will leave you and you can find your own way home. Then let them make the decisions. Most chicks love my confidence and command. They get that I know what I want and I can pull off the weekend. And go for it. By the way I have a couple of girlfriends that come down from the states occasionally. One is 22 and the other is 41. They both come here because they can walk on the wildside with beautiful Ticas. So it’s the same scenario, but with one gringa - and they usually want bump and get really wild.
 
In addition, I do the conservative girlfriends here usually early to late twenties, brunch on Sunday take the kids to the park, drop em off with grandma and then my pad.
 
 So if you are a local here you can get what you want. I would never ever even fathom living in the US again. Sexually starved politically correct crap. What I call the [snip]stem. Never.
 
Rico? For me it is rico beyond belief - and for many years. For you? Well I guess it depends on who you are and how you play it. Is it as easy as it used to be? No because it cost more money now, and gringos are hardly novelties here. But I am not in my twenties or thirties (thank god) they say youth is wasted on the young and they sure were right), and don’t really care if I find a “mate” or not, and its frickin Dreamland to me. Dogs, ranch, river, coffee fields, spa, big TVs, computers, stereos, guest house, new car, maid, caretaker. Look in Cuba I can’t have these things, and in Colombia I don’t know if I would want to drive in a new car and have an Iphone and wear jewelry and nice clothes. So although CR is no longer a no-brainer, it’s still the best option I have found for living outside the US. Living outside the US to me separates the men from the boys when it comes to experience in Latin America.

[Bob_S]

Not exactly forum related, but an entertaining read, nonetheless.

The people are charming to your face but ethnophobic. They don’t like strangers. Even strangers from the next town!

Have seen that same mentality in Japan.  Everyone is wonderful and polite to you if you are a short term guest, but if you move into their territory permanently, you will soon see the other face, and it is not so pretty.

[fathertime]

Hey Aconcepts! Interesting perspective and lifestyle in Costa Rica!


I guess you feel the risk is worth the reward regarding the condom free lifestyle you are leading!  Partying on the beach naked is always memorable, it was recently outlawed here in CA at the local so cal beach, not that I would do it anymore anyway, but what a nanny state I'm in!  Has the practice been banned where you are at too?


Fathertime! 

[Zon]

Well, there are a MILLION WAYS TO SKIN A CAT:)   We all try to be happy, few are as honest with themselves or others, so you are AOK in my book AConcepts.

I do not want to live full time in the USA - especially with a smoking hot (and loving) wife from a foreign country.  CR is a possibility.   I have to look at little harder at some Caribbean islands and Panama.

Thanks for the good post - that is the level headed, real stuff I like to find!!!!

[Tanuki]

Level headed?  His honesty and straight talk is commendable.  Liked the information about Costa Rica.  That is one of the places I would like to visit.  I would also like to go to Cuba to.  But, I wouldn't agree that he is being level headed.  unprotected sex with strangers is a bubble off from being level.  Each dance is a roll of the dice. 

[aconcepts]

FT - that was that was over 20 years ago and well I don't think I could dance the same way now as I did then. Even if I could I don't think I would, hahaha... Somethings are left best the way they were.  Here in CR there are laws against everything - but no one really pays any attention to the little ones such as victimless crimes. They are such horn dogs here that anything to do with skin is applauded. You should see the TV shows that everybody watches on the nationl channels. They ae soft porn. Whole family is watching em.


No condom? The trick to that is picking your partners as in being "Picky." yeah roll dem dice... no one gets out alive anyways... Also I have always been a risk taker. Been burned too. Had the crap kicked out of me, kicked the crap outa some, made a lot of money, lost a lot of money, cut lose Quiksilver bathing suit models cuz i didn't like the pitch of her voice, and laid in bed at night without bad company wondering what could have been if... Like my real estate mentor said: I know several poor people that have never lost money. But I don't know any rich people that have never lost money. Goes with the territory.


Its like coupling up: I know a lot of people that are in a relationship and way more than half of them wish they weren't. The majority of the rest of them stick together - but they have not had sex in how long? So how you gonna play it??? Some people find a person and say - hey this is as good as its going to get. And they make their bet and stay. Nothing guaranteed. Others say hey that was good, but I think its gonna get better. They make their bet and move on. Nothing guaranteed. It kind of gets down to "a lot of mediocrity and repetition or spurts of intensity and moments when you do not have bad company.


Romantics seem to want to roll the dice more. I see that with girls here too. They are very romantic. The beautiful ones like in all the world mostly, you gotta pay a lot of attention. Those that do not entertain illusions of peak experiences and settle for tedious experience in life are the kinds that takes less risk. But they entertain other illusions such as security...


There is no security. Security is a state of mind. Just like happiness and loneliness. It all just for a little while anyways. Once you get that then you are free to be your self. The real you. Free to exercise your personality and not try to be other than who you are to stick by someone or get something.


Hey there are always going to to be other that will like or love you for who you are. And some who will like or love you for who you pretend to be. The problem is what happens when the real you comes out. Its a mathematical impossibility that everyone is going to like you so just be yourself. Then you have real friends and its easy as breathing to keep em.


Just is that most people have so many faces they are lost as to who they are. They no longer know which face is them.  Also most people fail to resolve their death. Accept your death and you will accept your life. Lot of freedom in that. So frick it, I am going to die anyways so I make my choices the best I can and roll baby roll.


All my life people have been telling me what I can't do. Its like when someone tells you that you can't park there after you just turned off the motor. Well it kind of looks like I am parked here! They just love to argue with reality cuz it does not jibe with their take on how things are supposed to be... You know those people always telling others how they should live?


Seehitz,, I just go the way I am going and pay little attention to them unless they are worth paying attention to. Gotta know the difference. That is why I am here and why I am heading to Colombia. Many tell me "its dangerous." Crap that is what they said about CR when I first started investing here more than twenty years ago. When I left the beach for the vineyard area I was called crazy. They built an empire there and I laughed all the way to the bank. When they told me to leverage my paid off real estate for capital to buy more. I said Naw I'm good. I was called crazy "everybody is doing it." Now I am a genius so they say in real estate circles. The point. I do what works for me not what i am supposed to do or should do.


In the states I am supposed to live in a big house and act a certain way and date women more my age and hang with the same economic level. Que va! I always live way below my means. Best way to stay poor is to act rich. Best way to stay rich is to act poor.


 Acting rich just get you people always trying to sell you something, or a bunch of "Yes" men, and phony friends. Also it takes away the element of surprise. Like when my real estate mentor was on the bus going to pick up a car and drive it back from his brothers place. He was sitting there with his clothes in a brown paper bag (it was a day trip and he was this simple genius Okie multimilloinare. Didn't have nothing to prove to nobody but he liked some toys. Well he  and this other guy are sitting together on the bus and a new 560SL drives by. The guy next to him says, man that is a nice convertible. My friend says. "yea I got one in red. great car and comfortable. Then a while later a Winnebago motor home passes the bus and the guy says. man that is a nice motor home. And my friend says yeah I got one wish I would have never bought cuz I don't use it. The guy says nothing. Next a fast bikes speed by and the guy says man I wish I had a nice motorcycle. My friend says, yea I gotta a Kawasaki 1100. After that the guy next to him says. Well if you got all those thing then you must have money so what the hell are you doing here sitting on this bus with a bag of clothes in your lap!!! hahahahaha -


it was true he did have all those things and he could have taken an airplane, but he just wanted to take a bus ride. That is how life is if you are smart. You can do what you want to do. Act like you want to act. Not act according to others expectations of your morality or wealth.


Most rich people are boring. They make money and stop living/risking. They seek social cushion from the real world. They invent a world that they well control and stay inside it. Life is to be lived. Its hard to know what is real when everyone just tells you what you want to hear.


Thats why I live in Latin America. That is why I go hang where the players are on vacation. because I should? hell no. Because its real and everyone is having fun and I just blend in with the other happy gringos. The difference is I go home to the coffee region and they go back to the US.


Or when that is no fun. I go to a local but out of town bar and watch football (soccer) and hit on the local girls. Tell them they are beautiful, by them lunch or a drink. Get their phone numbers. Or I buy drinks for the guys and they introduce me once they know I am almost Tico and I get it. Like the things they do and understand why they are how they are. That is what makes Costa Rica rico.


Now if you gonna pull some chick away from her family to live with you far away, and she really loves her family... hmmm. Yes I understand but I kind of think its better for me to hurdle the cultural gap than her. I like beautiful young ladies (some are very normal/not beauty queens) and found that their family gives them support that I cannot give them.


I am not talking money. Latins love their family. Many do not want to be 10 miles away let alone in another country. So there is another roll of the dice. Its all a crap shoot. Some make it work and others don't. No one really frickin knows... now do they. I sure don't. I am just spewing crap the way I see it. Being me. Let the cow dung fall where it may...


Gotta go my girl just finished preparing a cantalope and papaya fruit salad. Gotta do important stuff plus her kid wants to play with the neighbor kids across the street. Life!


Speaking about money and family if you get hooked up with a young beautiful girl and you intend to live by her family, well what worked for me once was I paid of the remainder of her fathers mortgage, and then let em know that although I will continue to be generous regarding family functions and event, the bank is closed. Worked.


My chick said look he paid off your mortgage what more do you want! She intercepted anything after that - I was basically never bothered. But I always bought all the food and booze for the get togethers but they cooked it. Man we had great times... Oh well... we eventually split up but her dad loved me even after the break up. Mom didn't though! hahahah... Nothing worse than a rich cheapskate...

[Zon]

dude, we should start a discussion board! 


LOL  I love you work.

[benjio]

Great stuff. Congrats on finding yourself and living the life you want...something many men never have the opportunity to do.

[aconcepts]

Its important to accept the idea that you can be free.


Many think it impossible. Its not. I lived in an unfree world for many years.


To be free you must identify the price to be free. Then pay it in full. Completely. Partial payment wont do.


Don't fall into the emotional trap and dump your life and run off. Identify your situation. What it will take to be free from, bad marriage, bad job, boring culture, sexless life, and the group trap; thinking you have to do as the group does, or as your parents do or for that fact anybody else thoughts about your behavior.


Make a plan and follow it.


You can be free.


The first step is to realize yourself. Know what is important to you. When you define yourself then you can map out a plan that will satisfy you upon completion. Its important to know what you really want, or you might not want it when you get it.


To now what you want means to know who you are.


That takes time alone.


Make space for yourself - and yourself only. When other think you want to be free of your situation, they may get jealous and hold you back by dominating your "self-time." Don't talk about self defining to others. Just quietly do it.


It takes a while to get used to the idea of being free, defining yourself, designing a life the way you want it. However, its worth it and its the first step to being free from what others think and what others want for you.


Its about you, and what you want. When you figure that out you will place yourself intuitively around other similar people. This is where you are likely to find like people that have SOME of your goals and find support and encouragement. Don't look for carbon copies. There are none. Do not try and copy others exactly. Do it your way according to who you have discovered inside you. You are unique and your definition is not like anyone else.


Remember don't false start. Don't broadcast your plan and beat your chest about your plans to break free. It may make your situation less tolerable.


You can do it. realize that we all think we need more than we really do. Life is not that complicated. You can be free with less.


"Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose" There is a lot of truth and freedom in that quote.


The more you have and the more you want to control the more of a fixed position. In strategy its called a guard position. You have little movement when you are guarding and administrating.


Being free is as much about what you don't want as it is about what you do want. It similar to what makes the music. The notes or the emptiness between the notes. What you do and what you don't do, what you want and what you don't want are equally important.


***After saying that - do not voice what you don't want. Always preface your goals and vision to yourself and out loud in terms of what you want. When you focus on what you don't want the world present what you don't want. When you focus on what you want the world has a unique way of presenting the physical equivalent of your desires. Important***

[robert angel]

Well written post--I enjoyed it. Doesn't sound like you're going to be sitting in a rocking chair too soon, old and alone, thinking about the things you 'coulda, shoulda' done....

[Jeff S]

Well, there are a MILLION WAYS TO SKIN A CAT:)   We all try to be happy, few are as honest with themselves or others, so you are AOK in my book AConcepts.

I do not want to live full time in the USA - especially with a smoking hot (and loving) wife from a foreign country.  CR is a possibility.   I have to look at little harder at some Caribbean islands and Panama.

Thanks for the good post - that is the level headed, real stuff I like to find!!!!

I have an electrical engineering intern working for me now whose a Panamanian, but grew up here. He goes there once a year or so and spends at least a week on one of the many small islands living like Gilligan. It sounds like an amazing time. The cities look pretty rough, but the rural parts look incredible.


You can always be a line handler to make a few extra $s, too: [size=78%]http://www.escapeartist.com/efam20/line_handling.html[/size]

[aconcepts]

There are many who have left Costa Rica for panama. Panama offers many perks to pensiandos.residents. Costa Rica discontinued there perks many years ago. I am a Highlander that is why Panama is not that attractive to me and of course  the gene pool in my tastes seems inferior to both Costa Rica and Colombia, its north and south neighbor. From what I understand Panama used to be part of Colombia but the people seem far apart ethnically. I only now the border area with CR and there appears to be a lot of indigenous bllod lines. Also the Panamanians I have met in Cr seem more dumir than Ticas or Colombianas. Now if you new to Latinas that could be a good thing. I wish I could kick the sensual sexy Latina habit. Just had a coed from Denver visit. Scandinavian blood, tall super slim and went over with my friends big time because she is such contrats to the women here. Now she is the same age as my preferred Latina (22) and it was great speaking English and relating to the States. Nice being able to use a wide vocabulary and that allow me to use the depth of my personality, however, when I am with Latinas, 90% of the time they are totally present. I mean they are with you. Holding your hand, kissing, laughing, curious - affectionate naturally. Now my little wildcat from the north was great fun and equally curious,


That is where the similarity ends. Although she strapped on the 3 inch pumps and went downtown with me, so I have to give her big curiosity points, and we went to some strip clubs (her idea), and she did measure up to the physical beauty with her height 5' 9" snow white complexion and Norway blond hair, skinny as a rail, and I am not a JLo ass man, so that said, and the fact that she was educated, somewhat affluent and mannered, on the street and in the sack she doesn't measure up.


The Ticas are provocative by nature. They know how to dress and how to walk with great sex appeal - naturally. The wildcat was great, don't get me wrong but only about 2O% OF THE TIME DID SHE MAKE ME FEEL LIKE SHE WAS MINE ALL MINE LIKE A TICA. That is a huge difference. Our age difference is wide and after 14 days on vacation with her all over Costa Rica it took me three days to recover. This is another cultural difference. Ticas let you know how they feel. I always felt like I was excavating feeling with the snowcat - and that she wanted more of everything.


I am in no way putting her down. Cool kitty all the way. Just different. Look if I was sane i would be dating Buddhists or Asians. But the sex is so much better with Latinas. The only comparable sex i have had was with french women. Silly and senseless but super passionate and pleasing. Also Ticas (of course I am generalizing) have such a natural sense of humor. I mean you can make mistakes around them and they just laugh. Look I am not saying huge mistakes but there just does not seem to be that uncomfortable pause when you say stupid stuff or take an extra long glance at a passerby.... Now I am talking mostly interesada but also former interasadas that are now friends with rights. Girls that want to go and party and dine and drink but are down for spa time afterwards. Also the good girls as long as your are still in the dating mode also have a chuckle at you - a man being a man.


When you become committed they get very territorial. I don't think gringas act that way. I have had other interasadas get upset when they see me with other women. And it was sex with no strings attached. However when they are with you it very much feels like there are strings attached. So when there is that level of emotions I can understand why it spills over to the street. Latinas are a special type of woman, and not easy or uncomplicated - generally speaking. Highly addictive. My advice - don't start. Go Asain.

[aconcepts]

Robert – regrets – we all have them. How many I think I the question. Sure it would be nice to find the love of my life and feel that I would die in her arms. Low probability. I am very romantic so it takes toughening to cut em loose sometimes. However, I live an extraordinary life, really do. I appreciate and am thankful every day. It all has to do with risk and playing your cards and priorities. Now that is all about Latin America. If you want a life here or even a Latina there are a lot of risks and its easy to fall in love. Look, when I was young I was quite handsome (I have been told) the confidence type is different. Why – because as a man with age (as the Ticas graciously put it) your appeal is different. I did it on looks and strength in my 20 and 30s. Them you develop technique, you come to understand what women want: I don’t mean understand women. I get what they want and as to why they want it who the hell knows. But I find that you have to believe their lies and most important remember that the lies you are believing are in fact lies. Here lying is huge. Nice lies. Ugly lies. They are everywhere.
 
My point is that some lose confidence because they are older. Its like with the wildcat. Some of those nights I was like Ali laying on the ropes letting here pound away in bed and in the clubs. Then at the right moment you spring off the ropes and at the percie moment you deliver a flurry. Wham, knockout! That is experience and technique working. Yeah she does not want me for the reasons she wants a young man. I am noy going to maul her for two hours straight as I once did. However, they are different reason she wants me. Number one is elements of emotional maturity. Young men don’t have it. Its takes living. Me as being young I thought so many more things were important that I would chose to make a stand on anything/everything. Older now, I get how you can let things side. Pick your battles and not be so preferential. Takes what’s there instead of trying to control the outcome. That is maturity. Then there is money. If you have been good with it you have some. Women like nice things and nice places. It impresses them. Next is education and experience. Women like stories and interesting conversation, then its personality; You tell them the nice little things they like to hear. They don’t have to be exactly true. This gets back to the lies Ticas tell – about themselves to themselves. Maturity allows you to identify the image a woman has of herself and reinforce it. They love that and are grateful to you for “getting” them (even in reality it is not who they are – but that does not matter). Just remember that the lies you are believing are in fact lies.
 
The bottom line is you play your cards. Young men are dealt a hand and older men are dealt a hand. This goes for philanderers and wanabe long term relationship types like me and those who are committed to the soul mate thing (ok- I said it, hate that term). So even if you are pussy whipped US male, (you know who you are) understanding from experience (maturity) will get you a long ways.
 
Remember there is the right move, which involves justice and saying what should be said. Then there is the winning move which means taking what you can get and not saying things you could say. Both are appropriate for different situation. How you play your cards and your hand shapes the outcome.
 
Regarding Latinas, yes they like the young studs – all women do, but they hate their methods. So in Costa Rica there are plenty of Ticas looking for older guys that “get” them. Look women are not as visual as men. They want to know your personality, what you do and how you act; Do you have manners and charm, know how to dress, which fork to use. They are impressed with that crap. We men, we could care less (generalizing). What does she look like and how good is she in bed… If you are the type the needs nursing, fussing over and feeding then you have other questions and you are looking for mommy (nothing wrong with that if that what you want). Me I can cook really good (my favorite date I lay a mattress out in the livingroom, and cook and watch movies all day. I cook great, and the chick digs it and there always is a trail of food from the kitchen to the bed that ends up in all different kinds of placed. The maid get a kick out of the mess too. I alsoknow how to do laundry and wipe my own butt. Don’t need a woman for that. A cleaning lady maybe, but I don’t women chores. They like that. Now many chicks come over and play and then they do the dishes and wash and clean the house while I write or do biz on the phone or net. If it makes them happy – ok. But I ain’t yellin out  “Mable bring me a beer!”
 
So do I regret things. A couple. Mostly not. Did I get everything in life? No. Who does? Am I satisfied. Yes, incredibly so. Is my satisfaction enough to rest on my accomplishments? Maybe, but why. When I am permanently horizontal, I’ll have all the time in the world to rest. So instead of resting I am still risking. Do I bet the house? No. But when you play outside your league you have a slim chance of finding your dreams, but a higher chance of getting scratched (Latina cat fights are sexy) and bruised. Remember Latinas fall off one horse and have little trouble mounting a different one.  They well understand that their vaginas don’t wear out.  That’s part of the beauty and hurtfulness of it. Love is a battlefield here, so if you are strong enough emotionally there are wars worth fighting. I savor my victories and belive that having moments with gorgeous women is better than having nothings, Sometimes they last into longer periods. Sometimes its once or twice with the drop dead gorgeous ones. Sometimes they come back around because of how you treated them. It would be greedy to regret that I didn’t get more. I got what I deserved. Effort is the key.

[the_ace33]

hey I know you guys havent heard from me in a while so Im adding a story today.  well I spent 3 months at my fathers farm a while back.  The chica action was a little slow but the across the street neighbor was into me.  She had a kid but she was hott and sweet so I eventually took the bait.  So we had friends with rights the rest of my stay and it was quite nice.  We stayed in touch when I went back to Texas and I started growing feelings for this chica.  So when I got here a few weeks ago for my second 3 month stay I was gung ho to be back here with my girl.  After about a week I started seeing some changes in the way she was treating me.  I kind of shrugged it off thinking it was nothing because hell I was still getting the sex so why complain.. a week after that she basically cut me off.  I thought it might be because there was no commitment so I asked her to be novios.  she said no.  She said that I was not into her kid.  so for the last week or so Ive been playing with the kid and I bought him a couple of gifts but she still says she just wants to be strictly friends.  So thats find I guess its time to move on.  I went into San Isidro and got a few numbers and such.  I guess the point to my story is that this whole thing was kind of strange.  I mean everything was going so well.  I was friends with the family, she was sweet and into me.  we even had a little side business together.  So Im not sure exactly what went wrong.  Maybe long term relationships are non existent these days unless you want to get stuck with a fat chick which ofcourse I would not do.  I found Colombia alot easier to get dates and more girls interested, but still they come and go.  Perhaps the romantics like myself are out of luck when it comes to having a long term sweetheart.  I would like to ad also that being a gringo around here is barely a novelty.  I have to bring my game just like I would have to in the states.  So much for easy peasy!! 

[Zon]

I would like to ad also that being a gringo around here is barely a novelty.  I have to bring my game just like I would have to in the states.  So much for easy peasy!!

YEP - same is true in Colombia if you want a woman that is not disadvantaged and with education and prospects.  You have to be the best you can be.   

[aconcepts]

Yes Gringos are hardly a novelty and with marginal Spanish you chances of anything more than getting laid are less. The idea that the US is the center of the world is going the way of baseball cards. People are into different things now. Use your white charm because it used to symbolize education and wealth, now there are other sources of that in different skin colors. To me being a wife hunter and bringing her back to the US is strange because of the huge culture gaps. I am dating this Dominicana and she said that I was different from most gringos because I like to talk and socialize. She said she thought most gringos were uptight and work all the time. She was in Miami and dated a guy with 2 or 3 jobs. She said even in Miami with its huge Latino population she felt that the living to work mentality sucked.


People are starting to understand that materialism and making more money than you need at the expense of living and laughing and relationships in general is not all that fun. The USA land of the free. Self enslaved from personal greed. I would rather live in Hawaii in shorts and T shirts broke than trade my hours for handfuls of dimes six days a week.


Money enhances who you are. It intensifies your personality and character. If you are an idiot and you have money you are a bigger idiot. If you are cool and you have money than you are even cooler.


To me the goal is not to be a rich man but a complete man. Money hardly makes you complete. Its one part of the puzzle and many Latinas are wising up to that.


They find they miss their culture. If you are going to marry a Latina know their culture, Because you are marrying that culture as well as the woman.


That maybe why Ace experiences his outcome. I do very well here because I understand and enjoy the culture. I like to do what Ticos like to do mostly. A lot of the time it requires lowering your ambition and taking time to hang out. Doing simpler things. This is hardly a progressive culture...


I remember in the US I listened to Dr. Laura. and she would harp on women because they would say they found the perfect man. then have a list of things about him they wanted to change. To me its like finding the perfect Latina and wanting to change her completely by bringing her to the states. Is that trying to change her in a passive way by bringing her to a different culture will she will have to act differently (change) or feel like an outsider??? Are wife hunters claiming to find their match and then really trying to change them? If so, are they really a match? Why would you couple up with someone you want to change?


You bring a simple traditional woman to function in a progressive society? Hmmmm.. Sound like the poor chick from Soledad with the trophy hunter husband. Recipe for disaster.

[Jeff S]

If you are going to marry a Latina know their culture, Because you are marrying that culture as well as the woman.

Abso-freaking-lutely That's why I've always suggested that people find a culture they love and can live the rest of their lives with before every going wife hunting.