Love in Barranquilla

[jvoorhees]

I recently returned from my first trip to Colombia in search of love.  I had a wonderful time and thank all of the posters on the this for the inspiration, encouragement, and great advice.  I hope this post will help other newbies in their journey for love.

About Me
I am 34 years old.  I have 4 beautiful daughters between the ages on 11 and 5.  I have been divorced for about 4 years.  I have a good job, but not much savings.  As a contractor, I have no vacation time at work.  But my boss is flexible with me taking some time off and I can work overtime before and after to make up for the lost income.  I never had any Spanish in school and couldn't say anything more that Hola.

Planning
My first goal in planning was to learn as much Spanish as I could before my trip.  I purchased Rosetta Stone and several Spanish to English books.  I also hired a private tutor for 4 hours a week to teach me Spanish.

Unfortunately, my work and personal life got busy and I wasn't able to devote the time to learning Spanish like I hoped.  I only got through the first of four sections in Rosetta Stone.  And only kepted up the tutuor for 4 weeks.  (but I am so glad i had the tutor.  It helped me the most with confidence, the basics, and pronunciation.)

I broke down and finally got an ATM for my bank account.  Before my trip, I called the ATM and 1 credit card I brought and told them of my trip.  I also went to my bank and got $1000.00 dollars US converted to Colombian Pesos.

I purchased a cheap digital watch to wear on my trip so that I wouldn't risk getting my usual watch stolen.  I also purchased a cheap digital camera to avoid losing my expensive Canon.  I made two copies of my Passport.  I also made a copy of both sides of my credit card and ATM card in case they were stolen so that I could quickly call and report it.  I also purchased a money belt so that I wouldn't have too much money in my pockets or wallet.  I did not have a fake wallet, but did empty out anything of value from it so that I wouldn't worry about having it stolen.

I decided to use an agency so that I wouldn't have to worry about the logistics and could focus on meeting and getting to know the women.  I went with Jamie's agency based on many reviews I have read here and my own research elsewhere.

Day 1
I was very nervous getting off of the plane.  I didn't know who I was meeting and was sure I'd get lost of the shuffle of the people and never find my ride.  After passing through security, I was expecting the rest of the airport, but was suddenly outside.  Before I could get my bearings, my translator was standing in front of me introducing herself.  I was so relieved and excited.

My translator was accompanied by a young, beautiful women.  The three of us got in a taxi and started the long journey to the agency house.  It was raining so traffic was extra slow.  The first thing I noticed was the driving is way different that in the US.  Most of the vehicles on the road on either taxis or motorcyles, with the occasional truck or bus.  The cars are all small.  And everyone drives like they are on the indie 500 with no lanes.  It is completely chaotic, yet stranglely orderly.  It seems like no follows any traffic laws, but everyone seems to pay more attention to other drivers and be much more respectful of letting them in front of you.

I arrived late to the house and had just a few minutes before my first introduction.  The first thing I learned was that they had been having a hard time finding dates for me because of two issues:

1. I have four daughters
2. I answer NO to the Religon question.

My first introduction was with 12 beautiful ladies.  It was really a very awesome, intimidating experience.  I sat down and immediately realized that I was not prepared at all.  I spent all of my spare time trying to learn Spanish, that I spent little time thinking of questions to ask the women.  Thankfully, my translator was wonderful and thinking up many questions to ask the ladies.

The real goal of the introductions is to determine if you and they want to have a second, individual date together.  So they are best served by asking your deal breaker questions to the ladies to rule out the ones where you would likely not have a long lasting relationship with.  But they are also important in determining chemistry.  So it is import to ask fun questions to see if there is any connection between you.

When the introduction was over, they took a group photo and wisked me away to ask me which girls I wanted to see again.  At the same time, they had the girls indicate if they want to see you again.

I ended up choosing 5 of the 11 for a second date.  I choose a few who I found less attractive but more of a connection.  And did not choose several who I found more attractive, but felt there was less of a connection and not a match with my deal breakers.  I think overall, at it best to err on the side of having more dates with more women at this point.

I then went to a late dinner with the women at the introduction who I liked most.  She was the only I remembered her name of the 11, but I'll just call her Snow White.  Snow White and I had a wonderful time at dinner.  We talked and talked.  And felt very comfortable together.  We had a lot in common.  She was very patience with my poor spanish and communicating through a Spanish/English Dictionary.  She even taught me to dance a little at the restaurant.  The only thing I noticed was that Snow White seem relucant to touch.

Day 2
I started the morning with breakfast with a new women.  We ate at more of an americanized restaurant.  She was nice, but there were no sparks. 
I came back to the agency house for an introduction with 1 women.  I'll call her Cinderella.  Icame back late so had little time with her.  She was a very beautiful women.  She impressed me and struck me as a very responsible, mature women.  And we had some mutual interests.  So I said I wanted to see her again.

I then had a date with a woman from the night before.  She was less attractive, but I felt a good spark.  We had a nice, long conversation.  She mentioned that she was hungry and had the name of a restaurant that she wanted to go to.  So my translator and I went to lunch there with her.  It was fancy.  Too fancy.  Wonderful Colombian food, but way more than I expected to pay.  She seemed very interested in me.  But I wasn't so much in her.  And pushing for the fancy restaurant left a bad taste in my mouth.

I came back to another group introduction with 3 beautiful ladies.  I had spent some time thinking of questions and reviewing the questions on Jamie's site and was feeling more confident, comfortable.  I really had a fun time with this introduction.  Unfortunately, there were no sparks or mutual goals with any of them.

I then had an introduction with another new women.  There was no sparks or interests.  So far, I was really excited about Snow White.

I then went to the mall to meet with Ariel.  As soon as I got out of the cab, her arm was wrapped around mine.  It felt utterly amazing.  We walked around the mall and had a great conversation.  Ariel was a resourceful women who knew how to take care of herself.  We had a lot in common and she really seemed like she would be an excellent wife.  And she was very interested in me with lots of affection.  On the ride home, she initiated a kiss with me.  It was wonderful.

I then went to the movies with Snow White.  It was great to see her.  But after the long night of talking before, neither of us could think of anything to say to each other.  I was really exhausted at this point after meeting so many women.  I was starting to have a hard time telling them apart.  I still really liked Snow White and felt a spark.  In the movie, I put my arm around her for a while, then we held hands.  She seem really into the movie.  I was hoping for a kiss, but I felt there was not right time.

Day 3
I had breakfast with another new women.  She was a very serious and responsible women, but she didn't feel interested in me.

I then had lunch with Cinderella.  It was at another fancy place.  A wonderful place with great Colombian food, but a little more than I wanted to spend on a second date.  But my translator picked it.  I had a simply wonderful time with Cinderella.  I felt totally comfortable with her and never ran out of things to talk about like with Snow White.  She asked me why I wanted a second date and what about her that I liked.  I told her that I really liked how she seemed like a very responsible mature women who has some interests that I do.  She seem very happy that I didn't focus on her body as many men she has dated seem to only like her attractiveness.

I then had a date with Belle.  She was a very sweet and innocent women.  We went to the park, but it started to rain so we moved to the mall to walk around.  I had a good time with her.  She seem interested in me and we had fun trying to communicate with my poor spanish and my Spanish/English dictionary when my translator stepped away.  My overall impression of her was that she was really beautiful and sweet, but very inexperienced in relationships.  I told my translator than I liked her, but thought that I'd corrupt her if I developed a relationship with her.  And that it would be best to end it.  But my translator encouraged me to keep seeing her, so I did.

I then met at another mall with Ariel.  When we got in the cab, she gave me a present.  It was magnet with a romantic message on it.  And in a card that had her love for me written all over it.  It was very creepy.  It seemed almost stalkerish.  I was so bothered by it that my translator even ask me later in the date if I was alright.  But I continued the date.  She had a dinner and a felt heartfelt conversation about our pasts.  It was very touching and made me want to continue the date.  She then came over to the agency house and watched a movie with me in my room.  We kissed a little, but then she started to question me about kissing other women I was dating.  She seemed bothered about me dating other women and seemed like she was pressuring me to only see her.  We stopped kissing and finished the movie.

Day 4
The morning started out going to a Pool at a fancy hotel with Cinderella.  It had either a swimming or swimming and breakfast package.  None of us were very hungy, so I went cheap and got just the swimming.  But by the end of the swimming, we were all hungry and we got lunch there.  It was more expensive, so that was a dumb move.  Swimming with Cinderella was a lot of fun.  I felt very comfortable with her.  And I just loved being a gentleman to her by holding doors, kissing her hand, and saying sweet things to her.  And she melted when I did.

I then went to the zoo with Snow White.  It was her first time ever to the zoo.  She seemed very excited and interested in seeing the animals.  But not so much in me.  I kept trying to hold her hand.  And she kept drifting away.  I still felt a connection, but she was very reluctant to show any affection.

I then went back to the house to have an introduction with two new ladies.  Both were nice and I wanted to see them again.

Belle then came over and we spent some time in my room playing uno.  I showed her some photos of my family.  Then she showed me some of hers on her phone.  We had a great time and seemed to really hit it off.

I had dinner with a girl from that afternoon.  I was very exhausted and could remember anything about her.  I kept asking the same questions that I had asked her earlier.  I felt bad about it.  I apologized to her for being so tired and mentally exhausted and that I wanted to see her again.

Day 5
The morning started with Cinderella coming over.  We went to the grocery store together and bought some food.  She seemed very interested and natural in holding my hands and enjoying my company.  We came back to the house and I made omletes for her.  I really liked how she helped in the kitchen preparing the food.  She was very impressed with breakfast and we held hands through most of breakfast.  After breakfast, we went to my room and I showed her photos of my family.  She showed me her family as well.  We chatted a while with Google Translate.  It was wonderful.

I then went out with my translator and another staff member to meet women at the mall.  They wanted me to point out any women I was interested in, and they would go talk with them and set up a date.  Unfortunately, I did not find any that caught my eye.  I found I was less comfortable with this approach than I thought I would be.  And I think I my standards were raised after having several good dates and connections with Snow White, Cinderella, Ariel, and Belle.

Belle then came over and we spent some more time in my room.  I asked her to teach me to dance, but she didn't want to.  She we just talked alone with Google Translate.  I felt more attracted to her than before.  But the date was ended short by another introduction because Belle was late coming over.

I had a  single introduction with a lady who was not for me.  It was followed by a introduction with two ladies.  Both were nice, but not matches.

I then had some time before my next date.  So I went to dinner with my translator.  It was an amazing hole-in-the wall place with fantastic food.

I then meet with Cinderella again at the movies.  She came in the cab with one of her co-workers and I got to meet her.  We then went into the movie just the two of us.  We were snuggling quite a bit.  But in the middle of the movie she called the translator saying that she was tired and didn't like the movie and wanted to go home.  so we left in the middle of the movie.  I was quite confused as she continued to seem interested by holding my hands.  So I went with it.  When she dropped me off, I felt like she was ready for a kiss.  So I leaned in and we had a very brief, but so tender kiss.

Day 6
Cinderlla came over again in the morning.  We went to the grocery store and got some food for her to cook breakfast.  She was immediately and naturally holding my hand and kissing me.  I had received much advice from several people to not narrow it down to one women in the first trip.  But to instead, leave while still dating at least two or three.  That way I could see how the distance effected my relationship with each of them.  And then narrow it down to one in a second trip.  I agreed with that advice and planned on following it.  But that morning, Cinderella melted my heart.  I fell completely in love with her.  And by the time we returned from the grocery store, I told my translator to cancel all of my other dates and introductions.

When we came back to the house, Cinderella made empanadas.  They were utterly amazing.  I ate three.  I fell even more in love with her watching her cook.  So gentle.  So much care put into making food.  While we were eating breakfast, I told Cinderella that I had cancelled all of my other days and that I wanted to be novio/novia.  She was very excited and said yes.

We spent the rest of the morning watching movies, making out, and talking via Google translate.  She then made a very delicous lunch.  We ate together and then she went to work.

So I spent the afternoon running some errands, including getting a bouqet of flowers for her.  She was totally blown away by it when I gave them to her.

That night, we went to go meet her family.  It was a long drive in a not so good neighboorhood.  So the agency used a special cab driver who they trusted and he stay with his to drive us home.  Meeting her family was very nice.  It meant a lot that she felt good enough about me to introduce me to them.  But it wa very awkward.  I had never seen poverty like that first hand.  And was worried about putting my foot in my mouth, so I had a hard time coming up with things to say.  But it was a good time.  Her sisters seemed very excited and interested in meeting me.  Her mother seemed more apprehensive and reserved.  And her grandparents didn't seem to notice me there at all.

Day 7
Cinderella came first thing in the morning and we went to the zoo.  She was constantly holding my hand and very comfortable with my arm around her.  Before we left, she showed me a bunch of her photos from her childhood.  It was really sweet.  She then had to go to work.

I met her during her break where she needed to get her hair and nails done for work.  Not much of an activity, but I wanted to spend every moment I could with her.  She had mentioned reluctance of having me see her with her hair messy, etc.  So I expected just to see her in the cab to drop her off.  But then she took my hand for me to come in.

I sat and watched as she got her hair and nails done.  She talked a little when we could.  And held hands a little when we could.  But as I was sitting there, I suddenly didn't know if I would be expected to pay for this.  And neither did my translator.  We were now novio/novia and I was here with her.  But we never talked about it one way or the other.  So I didn't know the expectations.  So I sat and waited.

When she was done, Cinderella very quickly and discretely grabbed her purse and paid for it herself.  She didn't discuss me paying at all.  And didn't give the staff at the place the time to point to me.

We then came back to the agency house to my room for a while.  We talked a little and we made out a little.  I continued to be a gentle man and kept my hands at neutral locations like her back and stomach.  It felt passionate, but I still felt that she was not ready for a more physical relationship.  She went to work again and I spent the afternoon resting.

She came over again after work.  She then attempted to teach me to dance.  It was a lot of fun, but I was really bad.  My translator then went home to leave us alone together for the night.  We danced a little more.  When I was tired of dancing, she sat me on the couch and danced afew dances for me to watch.  It was simple amazing.  She is a fantastic dancer.  And I could see the love in her eyes.  I was really hoping she would spend the night.

We then sat and chatted on Google Translate.  And she should me more Colombian dances on YouTube.  she then called a cab to go home.  And we sat on the couch together holding each other until it arrived.

She asked the fair and it was 6,000 pesos.  The smalled bill I had was a 10,000 peso bill.  I gave it to her and said goodnight.  She shook her head no, got the change from the driver, then gave me the change. 

Day 8
Cinderella and I went to breakfast in the morning.  We ate at a small cafe with seating on the sidewalk.  The breakfast was a amazing.  But both of our eyes were bigger than our stomach and we had a full plate of left overs.  Cinderella looked around for a beggar to give the food to.  But there were none around at the moment.  She we held onto it.

We then went to a photo place to copy one of the photos of her as a kid that I liked.  While we were there, we got a photo of the two of us taken.  It was totally amazing.  The photo guy was such as artist and made the best looking photo ever.  She then went to work.

I spent the afternoon waiting and resting.  That night, we went out to eat at the fine dining restaurant that she works at.  It was fun to see her co-workers taking turns to come in and shake my hand to meet me.  She works in a nice place with some good people.

After dinner, she came over to the house and the translator went home.  I wondered again if she would spend the night.  We did some more kissing, but I remained a gentleman.  We talked a little, then I held her for a while while listening to some romantic music.  After a few songs, she went home.

Day 9
Cinderella came over again in the morning.  I took her into my room alone.  Then recited some very romantic Spanish words to her that I learned.  Then gave her a teddy bear.  And told her to watch over my heart while I was gone.  She melted.  She was so happy.

We then went to the beach.  The beach was very relaxing.  We just sat and enjoyed the breeze and wave rolling in while we had breakfast.  We walked through the surf a little and got a few pictures.  As we were leaving, she grabbed two of the glasses from breakfast and filled them up with seawater.  I was perplexed.  She came back with them, motioned for my feet, then proceeded to wash them off.  I was totally blown away and fell even more in love with her.
We then went shopping with her to get some stuff she need for work.  She bought shoes, underwear, and jewelry.  And she never once asked me for money.  We dropped her off and work.

She came over again that night.  It was our last night together.  I was really hoping she would spend the night.  We did the usual. Make out a little, talk on Google Trnaslate a little.  I never felt the right moment, so I kept my hands for being too adventurous.  When it was time to go, she tried calling a cab.  After 4 calls, there was still no answer.  So I took a chance and told her that if she couldn't get a cab, that she was welcome to stay with me.  And that I would sleep on the couch so that she wouldn't feel uncomfortable.  But she said that she that wouldn't be right.  And she then got a hold of a cab.

I felt like an idiot.  I got very little sleep worrying that I ruined it.  Fearing that I was too aggressive.

Day 10
I awoke early for the flight back to the US.  We picked up Cinderella at her house so that she could come with me to the airport.  We kissed a little, but mostly just held each other the whole ride to the airport.  She came in with me and stayed until I passed through security.  And read her a few lines in spanish that I had written telling her how much I love her and will be back soon.  We kissed goodby and I went through security.

Conclusions
My journey was a thousand times better that I ever hoped it would be.  I honestly expected not to find anyone.  I hoped that I'd find a woman who was sweet, reasonably good looking, who wanted to marry me.  But I never thought I find such a deep connection.

It does sound crazy to have such strong feelings so fast.  And while I am not yet ready to marry Cinderella, I can't stop thinking about her.   Since my returned we have exchanged about 10 emails and 4 phone calls.  Which is hard with my poor spanish.  I already have my second trip booked in October and can't wait to see her again.

My advice to newbies starting their own journey:
 
Go!!!   It is so worth it!

Colombian food is simple amazing.  Way better than the processed crap most americans eat.  It is the thing I miss second most in Colombia.

Definitely use Jamie's service.  It is absolutely amazing.  Worth every penny.  They make you feel totally safe and cared for.  The translators are great and not only translating the language, but also amazing guides to the culture and women themselves.  And it works out great when you go to the bathroom and they can get the inside scoop from the ladies without making it look like you are asking.

Expect to pay more than you think.  This is due largely because you pay for all of the taxis.  When a date comes over, you pay for her.  When you go places you pay.  When your date goes home, you pay for her taxi.  It is totally justified, just a larger expense that I thought.  I planned for $100 US a day.  I ended up spending about $200 US a day.  I found the first couple days were the most expensive with the most number of dates.
 
Don't be cheap.  It just ruins your time and makes you look bad.  You don't have to eat at all expensive restaurants.  But an occassional one won't kill you.  You only live once.  And if you find love, any amount in the world is worth that.

10 days is a bit short.  I was extremely lucky to find someone.  If I did it again, I'd stay for at least 16 days for a first trip.

Learn Spanish!  The ladies all got super excited if you spoke spanish.  And everyone I met was always so much friendly and excited to talk with you if you even attempted to speak in spanish.  It is a huge advantage in seeking a wife there.

Be a gentleman.  I came with the misconception that Colombian women would all be very aggressive sexually and ready to hop into bed with anyone.  But the women I met were all very reserved when it came to affection at first.  Cinderella even mentioned to me that I was the only person she has ever kissed before becoming novio/novia.  But by being a gentleman, it sets you apart from all of the Colombian men who chase beautiful women only for sex and their body.  If you genuinely interested in them for their inner qualities, they will melt in your hands.

Good luck to you all in your journeys!

[whitey]

What a great trip report - loved all the detail!  We need more of these.

I'm glad you had a successful trip.  For me, I would define success as just getting on the plane, keeping an open mind, meeting some women and experiencing the culture, and discovering whether it's your cup of tea or not.  You really hit the jackpot by finding someone with potential.

Jamie's sounds really exhausting, but it sure seems like he puts you in front of as many women as you can handle, and there seems to be good value for the money.

How incredible that you found a woman with a job, that seems to respect your money, and isn't a prepago willing to put out on the first date.  You must have found one of the only 10 or so in Colombia (the rest are already all married to board members).

So, when are you going back?  Also, you need to get your Skype on - emails and phone calls are good, but it's nice to see each other.

I'm really ticked off that you don't give any names of the restaurants you went to - do you remember?!    I'm always looking for new ideas.

Best of luck wife-hunter ...

[InSanDiego]

jvoorhees, congratulations on taking that first step. Hopefully you develop your relationship with Cinderella, take a trip to spend time with her exclusively, and see how that goes...

[fathertime]

That was a GREAT trip report Vorhees!   I'm happy for you man.   The first trip experience is one of the greatest you can have.  Hopefully you get back and see Snow White soon and keep the relationship alive. 

Definitely use Jamie's service.  It is absolutely amazing.  Worth every penny.  They make you feel totally safe and cared for.  The translators are great and not only translating the language, but also amazing guides to the culture and women themselves.

I agree 4-square, I also obviously think his service makes the cost reasonable!

Don't be cheap.  It just ruins your time and makes you look bad.  You don't have to eat at all expensive restaurants.  But an occassional one won't kill you.  You only live once.  And if you find love, any amount in the world is worth that.

 

Amen man, I have the same attitude! What the hell do we save our money for if we can't splurge on an adventure like this! 






Well, it will be interesting to see how things develop between you and your lady.  Just like you are telling the newbies to get to Colombia for the first time, I say to you, make that second trip as soon as humanly possible preferably within 3-4 months if not sooner!  You have good momentum now!


Fathertime!

[Jeff S]

Thank you for the great report.

[AndyLee]

WOW! Great trip report, thank you for sharing your thoughts and emotions that way. I wish you all the luck in the world.
I'm curious if you can share a little about Cinderella's thoughts? Since she is quite a bit younger than you and has never married or had children how does she feel about your 4 children?
And, when you talked with her about maybe someday moving to the US to marry you did you warn her about your climate? I wonder if she can even comprehend how freaking cold it gets in Minnesota   I remember one time spending July 4th in International Falls and there was frost on my tent that morning
Thank you also for emphasizing several times how important it is to be able to speak the language, at least a little bit.
Good luck with your future, enjoy your trip in October.
AL

[Gato4Astrid]

Jason Voorhes


Great trip report and am glad that you enjoyed yourself while staying in Colombia.  I hope Cinderella does not have 2 ugly, jealous sisters all over you and make sure to send Cinderella home before midnight!     About Snow White, she probably has 7 local short boyfriends!!    


Wow, you have 4 daughters!  Are you willing to have more children? !!!


Good luck with her

[jvoorhees]

Thanks all!  I glad you enjoyed my lengthy post.  I hope that the veterans will be able to use it to give me some more great advice.  And I hope the newbies will be inspired to begin their adventure and learn some good tips.

I am excited to return to Colombia to see my novia again.  I will be there for 5 days in October, about a month after I left.  I have my plane already and will be staying with Jamie again.

My novia seems very interested in my children.  So far, I think she will be very caring and wonderful with them.  She does want two kids herself.  And I am very excited about that.

I didn't go into details about the climate in Minnesota.  Kinda hard to really describe if you've never experienced that.  That will be something we'll discover if I am lucky enough to have her move to the US with me.

Thanks all!
 

[opusone]

That was one of the most informative reports I have read on this forum so far. It was happening in real-time when I read it. Great post!

[raycjs]

Jvoorhees,
 
great report, i am happy to see you may have found a good women. i am also happy to see you are going back so soon. you should take this time now at home to go through in your mind all the things you would like to speak to her about and put it down on paper so this next trip you can make sure this women is the one for you and you and her will be able to handle life at home in the US. i would also make sure you explain to her life in the US with your daughters and how she will need to be apart of your life and theres for many years to come. she will also need to know what your relationship with your ex wife mother of your children is like. the reason i am bringing this up is because life with ex's does not exist the same in Colombia as it does in the us. you should also find out if she wants to be a mother and if you want to be a father to more children... these our major issues and they should be addressed sooner then later. i am only telling you this because the way you write about her tells me she means a lot to you and could very well be the one after this next trip.... the last and final thing is to explain to her life when you visit her in Colombia is not the same as your daily life at home. i do not want her to think life at home is the same as you being on vacation and going out to eat 3 meals a day, go to malls and so forth.... take it slow and do not be afraid to ask her any and all questions you have no matter how personal you think they may be....
 
best of luck to you
Ray

[Researcher]

  Great trip report Jvoorhees.It reminds me of the trips I had back in the day.Day after day of meeting women and narrowing it down to the one I was most interested in.It's good you are able to return soon to continue things.

       Researcher

[dennislevy]

Great report.....Good luck with the lady...