Finding a wife through an agency.

[masonb]

ADVICE WHEN JOINING AN AGENCY

There are many different ways you can go about finding a foreign bride.  Different things work for different people but if you are considering joining an agency for introductions or tours here is a little advice that will prove to be very useful to you.

     1.Always do your research on the company before joining their service:  The biggest issue with most agencies are their legitimacy in this industry.  It is extremely crucial to find out who provides the best service before you decide to travel.  Make sure that you check the company out on the Better Business Bureau and other companies such as ripoffreport.com.  This will give you a great idea as to the track record of success with any business your doing research on.  Another way to get well informed on an IMA (International Marriage Agency) would be to check out the company in question’s testimonials or reference page.  If the company you are researching has virtually no references or testimonials this most likely is a major reflection on the business practices performed by the agency you are checking out.
     2. Be Realistic:  Now that you know what agency you want to do business with there are many things you should start doing to prepare yourself for your future trip.  First and foremost would be to write a list of everything your looking for in your future bride.  BE REALISTIC!  The average man that fails in this very diverse industry falls in “lust” not love.  Make sure that your search criteria for women stays within about 20 years of your own age at the very most.  The majority of the men who look into this make a huge mistake by dating women considerably younger than they are.  Sometimes you may have success, but if you are an older man and your looking for a woman with a 20+age difference you have to be realistic of what her intentions might be at that point and you might also want to re-evaluate your own intentions as well.  Ask yourself; are you looking to have a good time and that’s it, or do you want to actually find a meaningful relationship with a genuine, good hearted, marriage minded woman.  Typically the age difference comes into play later on down the road after you have already invested much time, effort, and money into this.  Don’t set yourself up for heartbreak a couple years down the road. Be realistic.
     3.Figure out where you want to travel:  The average of people who actually make the choice to travel with an IMA is miniscule.  This is a good and bad thing.  Its good because the approximate 3% of people who actually do go on a Singles Tour have a HUGE variety of potential marriage candidates when they get to the country their interested in.  It is also a good thing because for the women the service is typically free if it’s coming from a legitimate IMA. What this means for you is that your opportunity of meeting as many women as you need to find what your looking for is much more doable.  The negative aspect of this is that most men will never know what they are missing out on, and most of these women will spend years on an IMA site and may never get the opportunity to find a good husband.  With this being said look at your schedule, plan a date that works best for you according to when tours are being held, and book a reservation.  Now you can start thinking of WHEN you will be going and not IF.  This is a huge step that separates the men who are serious from the men who are interested but will never go and will never know what they are missing.
     4.Correspondence:  Once you have figured out where you want to travel, go to the IMA website and start looking for women to write to within the area you will be visiting.  Correspondence for some people is key.  For others it isn’t necessary at all.  Your letter or email to the woman should be genuine.  You should mention your intentions of traveling to her country on a set date, and you should also include a picture of yourself.  Try briefly mentioning a few things about yourself but don’t get into too much detail.  Because most men don’t actually do a tour or personal introduction there are a multitude of men on the Internet that simply write women just to be pen pals.  In the industry they are referred to as “Keyboard Romeos”.  That being said, it is crucial that you stand out above the rest of the men who don’t even intend to meet these women as most of the women receive an exhausting amount of letters and emails.  If you aren’t able to get any good quality correspondence going don’t worry, most people don’t start corresponding until after they have met a woman in person and know for a fact that they have good chemistry.  A Singles Tour held by an IMA will get rid of a lot of guesswork as you will have the opportunity to date many women during your trip. 
     5.Keep your options open:  One of the biggest mistakes that most men make on a Singles Tour is that they don’t keep their options open.  When you meet that special someone and the sparks really fly it will be easy to forget about the Socials and other ways that you can meet more women, such as more personal introductions.  Don’t let this happen to you.  As amazing as your potential bride to be may seem, many men have dropped out of all of the activities provided for the duration of the tour so that they can exclusively date the girl they think might be THE ONE.  If you do this you are opening yourself up to the possibility of it not working out and at that point you will have wasted your opportunity to really meet the right one.  Always keep your options open.  If you are upfront and honest about how serious you are with your search, most women will respect your decision.
     6.Fiancée Visa:  Once you have met the girl you want to invest more time and effort into dating exclusively you can choose to fill out a Fiancée Visa.   Some men will start filling the K-1 Visa out by the end of their first trip.  Others may want to get to know the woman more through correspondence before deciding to start doing the paperwork.  Whichever way you go about doing it the choice is yours.  Personally I feel that after you have met someone and have had the ability to get to know her pretty well your best bet would be to start corresponding with her exclusively for a while before you decide to go through all of the paperwork.  If you have the means available it would also be advantageous to visit again on your own with the intentions of dating her more exclusively. Once you decide that you want to start filling out the K-1 Visa you should keep a couple things into consideration.  First it takes about six to seven months to process a Fiancée Visa.  Secondly, immigration laws will require that you have proof that you and your future wife have spent time together in her country.  Make sure to take plenty of pictures of you two together while you’re over there if you have good chemistry.  While the paperwork is being processed there will be a few things that your fiancée will need to pay for on her end.  She will need to do a physical exam and also an interview with the US Embassy in her country.  It would be a wise decision for you to cover these costs for her but NEVER SEND MONEY TO SOMEONE YOU HAVEN’T MET!  Like I said previously you have to prove you have been with her so if a woman you have corresponded with says that she needs you to help her with the cost of obtaining a visa and you haven’t met her in person DON’T SEND HER MONEY.  She is certainly a scammer.  It is extremely difficult for someone from a different country to get a normal visa to the US and because of this the chances of the woman lying to you are so great it’s just not worth the risk.
     7.While you wait, keep your relationship alive:  If you have ever been involved in a long term relationship then I’m sure you already know that it can be very hard work.  It is important during the K-1 Visa process that you keep your relationship alive with your future bride.  Try buying her a cell phone with a good international plan so that you can talk on the phone.  Try and send her an email or text message at least once a day.  Make sure that if you have a scheduled time to talk with her on the phone you don’t miss it.  Most International Marriage Agencies also provide online English classes that you can purchase for your bride to be.  A big way you will be able to tell if she is right for you will be her willingness to learn your language.  You might also want to start taking initiative in learning her language as well.  All of these things are key in keeping your relationship with your foreign bride alive.
     8.Go get her:  While some men have not done this and still been successful it is in my personal experience it is very advantageous for you to go to your fiancée’s country and escort her to the US.  You have to remember that this is going to be one of the biggest decisions of her life.  Picking her up and escorting her back to the US not only shows some initiative on your own part but it also provides her the support she will need to make this courageous leap for you.  Remember that she is leaving behind everything that she knows and she might give you a mixture of emotions that should not be misconstrued.  Mainly she will feel excited, nervous, and overwhelmed.  Make sure to be receptive to her feelings and do what you can to be by her side no matter what.
     9.The 90-day trial period:  Before you and your fiancée decide to completely tie the knot make sure that you have all of your bases covered.  Keep in mind that you are her only source of support when she first arrives so you will want to make sure to be by her side every step of the way.  Help her meet your family and also people you are friends with.  Make sure when you introduce her to the people of importance in your life that you include her in your conversations and make her feel welcome.  Ask her what she would like to make herself feel more comfortable and welcome, and try to make it happen for her.  Include her in your life as much as possible for the first couple of months at least so that you can truly decide if marriage is the right option for you.
     10.Tie the Knot:  Make sure that when you pop the question you do it the right way.  Be romantic and thoughtful.  Tell her how much she means to you.  If you follow these steps you will have a much better opportunity of finding success in this industry than you would doing it another way.



Most of the men on this site would recommend you keep an agency out of the equation and try and do it yourself.  The decision is yours to make.  Some things work differently for different people but honestly if you want someone to help you every step of the way an agency is the best option in my personal opinion.  Make sure to do research.  Most people on this website are very passionate about how they feel you should go about doing this.  Keeping in mind there are many ways to go about this, get hard facts before you allow yourself to be swayed in any direction.

The purpose of this article is to allow those of you who are considering international dating to know all of the options that are available to you.  If the idea of traveling with a group of men to meet a whole lot of women does not sound of interest to you for whatever reason keep in mind that most International Marriage Agencies also provide personal introduction services and utilizing an agencies services eliminates not only the guesswork but also the trial by error that you most likely will be faced with in doing this on your own.

If you would like to learn more about International Marriage Agencies versus doing this on your own feel free to PM me.

[Dan]

Another 'tool' to use that is an objective measure, is the Agency Code of Ethics (ACoE), found at: www.CertifiedMarriageAgencies.org.

- Dan

[Dave H]

ADVICE WHEN JOINING AN AGENCY

9.The 90-day trial period:      

WTF are you talking about? One is not buying merchandise, that they get to try out for 90 days then return if it doesn't meet their demands! Go ask your bosses to explain the purpose of the 90 day period!  

Most of the men on this site would recommend you keep an agency out of the equation and try and do it yourself.  

I will recommend that people avoid any agency that operates ILLEGALLY in a country then tries to deny it and divert from the truth!

Most people on this website are very passionate about how they feel you should go about doing this.  Keeping in mind there are many ways to go about this, get hard facts before you allow yourself to be swayed in any direction.

We are passionate about ILLEGAL operations and their staff that try to hide the truth! If you can't tell the truth when your lie is easily exposed (in black and white), how can you be trusted to tell the truth when matters are more difficult to prove.

Dave

[Quixote9]

I believe the 90 day trial period the original poster mentioned was only in reference to the 90 day duration of the fiance visa.  Not a money back guarantee.  Just that you can try living together for 90 days before marriage

[Dave H]

I believe the 90 day trial period the original poster mentioned was only in reference to the 90 day duration of the fiance visa.  Not a money back guarantee.  Just that you can try living together for 90 days before marriage

It is not intended as a "trial period!" The couple must have already decided to marry. It is to have time to accomplish the wedding in a reasonable amount of time. (within 90 days) http://www.uscis.gov/files/nativedocuments/Nonimmigrant_Services.pdf

K1, K2 Fiancé (e) of a United States Citizen


"A U.S. citizen who marries a person while outside the U.S., can file a relative petition if the couple plans to live in the U.S. This petition is the first step towards the new husband or wife becoming a permanent resident.

However, sometimes the U.S. citizen and his or her fiancé(e) want to get married in the U.S. The K1 nonimmigrant category allows the U.S. citizen to file to bring the fiancé(e) to the U.S., so that the two can marry here. The U.S. citizen and fiancé(e) must have decided to marry, not simply wish to have the opportunity to spend time together to decide whether to marry.

This status cannot be granted to a person who is already in the U.S. If granted, status will be given for 90 days and cannot be extended. If the two marry within this period, this status becomes a pathway to the U.S. citizen’s new husband or wife transitioning to permanent residence, by allowing him or her to apply for adjustment of status.

The fiancé(e)’s unmarried children may be granted K2 dependent status to accompany the K1 fiancé(e).
This fiancé(e) nonimmigrant process is only available to U.S. citizens. It is not available to permanent residents or persons with any other immigration status."

Mason can now explain this to his boses and look smarter than them! 


Dave

[Capstone]

A agree with Dave, a K-1 should never be used or looked upon as a 90 day trial period - that is not or never has been its intent/purpose. A much better rule to follow is NEVER file a K-1 petition for someone until you are absolutely sure that they are the one person whom you want to spend the rest of your life with. I believe a person would be much better served by this rule than to try and use a K-1 as some sort of trial period.

Not to mention if you did take the full 90 days or even close to it then your fiancée would no longer be able to receive a SSN until after AOS is complete - as the SSA will not issue a SSN to a K-1 who has 14 or less days of validity remaining on their I-94.

EDIT: This is assuming of course that you would want to wait until you knew for certain that you were actually going to get married before getting the fiancée a SSN as she could get one before you actually get married (but of course why bother to get a SSN for someone if you weren't sure if you really wanted to marry them or not).

[masonb]

Hey guys,

Let me rephrase the 90 trial period so that you can fully understand what I'm trying to say.  I agree with what you all are saying in regards to this.  90 day trial period maybe was the wrong title for this section.  If you read that paragraph I'm simply stating that there are certain things you should do in order to make the transition comfortable for your foreign lady.  This is basically to ensure that within the 90 days your foreign lady is 100% willing and ready to marry you.  Obviously it isn't like buying merchandise.  I called it the 90 day trial period because those 90 days are crucial in providing your fiancee with enough support to make her feel comfortable with the transition.  Its more like a 90 day trial period for HER not YOU.  You are right that when you fill out the K-1 visa you should be ready to marry, however it can be pretty overwhelming for your woman and following these steps will ensure a smoother transition for everyone so that she doesn't feel like she is making a mistake by moving to the states.  In Bud Patterson's "Foreign Bride 101" he states that his wife was extremely on edge for a while when she first moved to the states with him and he couldn't understand that it wasn't his wrong doing but her being worried that something might go sour.  This is what compelled me to mention this transitional period.

As far as all posts in regards to AFA doing business illegally all I can say is that AFA is 100% positive that everything is legally operated and accounted for in PI.  AFA has been confidently operating in PI for 4 years and I personally doubt that they would risk legal repricussions to hold tours in one location.  AFA runs so many tours to so many places it just wouldn't make any sense to illegally operate anywhere.  I know a lot of you want some actual proof and I can understand that.  Unfortunately I am unable to provide this information/documentation.  In my other posts I stated that there are a few ways you could go about finding out if what I'm saying is true and genuine.  I apologize for not being able to provide this information but there really is nothing I can do to set your minds at ease except for the suggestions I've already made.  If you don't want to look into it further on your own accord than I really don't know what else to tell you.

[Ray]

As far as all posts in regards to AFA doing business illegally all I can say is that AFA is 100% positive that everything is legally operated and accounted for in PI.  AFA has been confidently operating in PI for 4 years and I personally doubt that they would risk legal repricussions to hold tours in one location.

 
I know a lot of you want some actual proof and I can understand that.  Unfortunately I am unable to provide this information/documentation.  In my other posts I stated that there are a few ways you could go about finding out if what I'm saying is true and genuine.  I apologize for not being able to provide this information but there really is nothing I can do to set your minds at ease except for the suggestions I've already made.  If you don't want to look into it further on your own accord than I really don't know what else to tell you.

You are nothing but a lying shill for AFA!

Either provide the proof or STFU!

All this stupid nonsense about AFA being sanctioned by the Philippine Government is just a bunch of bull shyt!

Now either provide the proof or stick it shill! We're tired of your BS!

Ray

[Capstone]

In Bud Patterson's "Foreign Bride 101" he states that his wife was extremely on edge for a while when she first moved to the states with him and he couldn't understand that it wasn't his wrong doing but her being worried that something might go sour.  This is what compelled me to mention this transitional period.

Wow next this guy will start quoting King Dphax from his award winning and best selling "Survival Guide for Single Men".

[Dave H]

Wow next this guy will start quoting King Dphax from his award winning and best selling "Survival Guide for Single Men".

Hey Capstone,

Maybe he/she gets a bonus for each of Bud Patterson's books sold. Bud is listed as the AFA "Sales Manager," one of masonb's bosses.

Dave

[masonb]

Thanks again for your replies. 

Honestly I don't think you realize how minute of a part I actually play at AFA.  I do not have the ability to prove anything, this is why I recommended doing a couple of different things to get the information that you want.  When I asked John Adams if I could post on this forum he told me that it was most likely a waste of time and people like myself on these forums are quickly ridiculed.  I honestly didn't care and don't care because I like my job, I'm passionate about what I do, and I completely agree with and believe in the integrity of AFA.  Call me whatever you want for this statement.  It really is a shame that we can't have a civil and respectful debate.  When I was told I would be open to ridicule I figured it would be a lot of people disagreeing with me, not a lot of people calling me names and attacking my character.  Because of the way you have acted on this forum towards me I am no longer going to post on here.  I'm sure most of you will be glad but I'm rather disappointed as this is an industry and subject matter that I have taken much passion and interest in.  I hope that all of you stay happily married or find the woman of your dreams with this complex adventure.

Best Regards,
Mason

[william3rd]

John Adams- hahahahahaha. He was supposed to be back here over two years ago to explain himself. Never came back. Gary Kryk-former director of tours- is a much better source of TRUTHFUL information. Anna, Sacha and Nadya, former managers in Ukraine, are a much better source of information of how they work. Hell, I have more first person knowledge about these guys. . . .

For the story of Big John and the other "wonderful" folks at AFA, www.facesofsiberia.com talks about the porn, sex tours, etc. Ashley Neal, the owner, was threatened with a lawsuit. Needless to say, he is still waiting to be sued and hs postings are still up.

Too bad, Mason. You will not be framing the debate in a fashion that will allow you to shill or put your company in a light that will allow you to sell tours. You are here due to desperation-finding a new source of "food" for your starving animal of a company, not due to any altruistic desire to "set the record straight" or to give the other side of things.

They sent you here because they dont want to try to disprove things that they cant disprove. Keep in mind that your company started as an effort to provide hookups in bars via computer. The porno production, distribution and sales and dual sex/marriage tours predates you. . .

Hey- do they still have that stack of books in the corner of the office about dominating and controlling women? It used to be their biggest seller. Probably found a closet for it when they moved to the bigger offices.

[william3rd]

Wow.  You have no idea what your talking about and you just went on a tangent of things I've already addressed.  YOU have no proof of anything and the reason I'm done with this forum is because you are ignorant and rude.

good day
Anyway , the puss shill boy just sent the above message by PM. . .


Mason my lad, I am holding in my hands a print out of a website called teengarden.com. This particular doc links both big john and porno BECAUSE he is listed as custodian of records for adult entertainers. It may have been changed by now but two years ago this guy was all over the web as a custodian of records. Ya cant explain this stuff away.

Got a large number of docs, emails, articles, first person declarations. . . . lots of PROOF!!!!

Mason, run along off to Johnstown and have a nice glass of Koolaid. . .


My feeling are hurt. . .

 

[Dave H]

As far as all posts in regards to AFA doing business illegally all I can say is that AFA is 100% positive that everything is legally operated and accounted for in PI.  AFA has been confidently operating in PI for 4 years and I personally doubt that they would risk legal repricussions to hold tours in one location.  

Since everything is "legally operated and accounted for," why doesn't AFA open an office in the Manila national capital region? I am sure they would do an even brisker business...until caught! Manila is much more convenient. Davao and Cebu both require catching another flight. Most people are afraid of travel to the provinces. The US State Department warns against travel to Mindanao. Instead, AFA only operates in two fiefdoms, located in the provinces, hundreds of miles from the national capital. One of your former competetors was already shut down in a fiefdom near your Philippine operations, when complaints reached the national level. It seems that he was holding multiple "engagement" ceremonies for his most popular ladies. Most westerner clients don't like to share their fiancees or wives with other men. Of 10 Fil/Am couples I know that met and married through his agency, 8 ladies divorced and remarried 1 or more times (the men are still single). 1 husband died, and 1 couple is still married.The owner was fortunate to have been back in the US when the bust went down! He was only banned from entering the Philippines for life. His Filipino staff were not so fortunate! You can question the owner...your owners probably know him and possibly where his double-wide trailer is located.  The last that I read, he has no money and is still hiding from angry former clients. His Filipina wife was vicious when news crews tried to interview him. There must have been no compenstation offered! I don't know if he has phone service that far out in the bundok.  

Dave

[william3rd]

Short update.

I had my friend, who is a Filipino with some government connections, put me in touch with an appropriate party in the PI government. I asked about the statements that our pet shill made on this thread. This representative stated categorically that the statements concerning the PI government's approval of AFA operations as related by Mason are completely false and then he requested more information about the company and its operations.

I have taken the liberty to provide an "educational" packet including their side businesses, names of principles, and photographs as copied from their websites.

What will happen? maybe nothing.

I think that the foreign corrupt practices act may come into play here at some point. I had a conversation with Ron in Volgograd in 2003 about their future intentions in PI since they had a travel agency approval which is not a license to violate the laws of the PI.

[Dave H]

What will happen? maybe nothing.

Hey William,

You might be surprised! If this info reaches the right Senator, and there are several who take this very seriously!...their "Love Boat" may not be afloat for very long in the Philippines!

Dave

[william3rd]

Hey Dave- why dont you give me the names of some of these appropriate senators? I would be happy to send them information as well. . . .

[piglett]

Why would a guy need an agency in Asia ?
All you need is a computer & a picture of ur self & they come running.